Fifty Shades at Fault
by sheltiegirl
Summary: Christian learns a hard lesson.
1. Chapter 1

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 1

**A/N: This is just a story I was thinking of writing in the future. I know there are a lot of Christian cheating stories so I don't know if I should add to them. Please let me know.**

After another busy day at work Christian's happy to be coming home. He can't wait to taste Mrs. Jones beef stroganoff, or a least that's what he hopes she'll be cooking, to play with his little boy Teddy and hold his adoring wife Ana in his arms. He told Taylor this morning that he felt like driving himself to work today so when parking his black Audi R8 back into the garage he noticed all the other cars present, even the SUV. Good. Everyone is home.

The elevator pings; he gets out, walks into the foyer and calls out "Ana, Teddy, I'm home."

But there is nothing but silence, deadly silence. And there is no delicious smell coming from the kitchen. "Ana? Teddy?' he calls again.

He begins to panic; his heart beats wildly with fear. The first thing that comes to mind is they've been kidnapped. He searches like a madman throughout the house calling "Ana! Teddy!" But, still no answer.

He looks into Teddy's bedroom thinking they fell asleep and didn't hear him but to his surprise, it is empty except for the furniture. His toys, books, photos and clothes, are all gone. What?

Christian then hurrys into his and Ana's bedroom and finds a shocking discovery. Everything of Ana's clothes, shoes, jewelry is gone too… except those things he had bought her. He feels heaviness in his chest. What is going on? He pulls out his Blackberry and calls Taylor. But Taylor doesn't answer. He then calls security. "Where the fuck is Taylor?" he yells at the person on the other end.

"He quit sir." Says the man meekly.

Huh? Why would Taylor suddenly quit?

Christian runs to check Taylor's quarters and sure enough, all of his possessions are gone too. And so are Mrs. Jones'. He becomes twice as puzzled now. Why is his family and two of his loyal, trusting staff missing?

In a daze Christian, in a fast pace walks to the kitchen counter and finds a manila envelope addressed to him. Inside are three forms all two weeks notices dated two week ago one for Jason Taylor, one for Gail Jones and one for Luke Sawyer. Ana's engagement and wedding rings come tumbling out of the envelope too.

Tears well in his eyes; he feels it hard to breath. This is his worst nightmare come true. They've all left him… but why?

Some rather damaging photos are in the envelope as well. Plus a note in Ana's handwriting: _**Well, I hope she was worth this, Christian!**_


	2. Chapter 2

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 2

Aftermath

**A/N: First off, I am AMAZED at the response I've received for this story! I'm at awe! So for all you 'cheatin' cravers' here's some more for you. And I'm honored that you all loved what I wrote and your reviews meant so much. Thank you. Enjoy.**

Christian sits on the edge of the soft white leather couch, the same one he'd cuddled up with Ana or sat on cradling his son in his arms, a broken man. He twirls the glass half full of Scotch in his hand, gulps the rest down and tosses the empty glass across the room. He doesn't care where it land or what else it breaks as long as it shatters into a trillion fragments like his heart feels and definitely what he's done to Ana's. He starts running his fingers through and pulling on his hair, pacing back and forth in agony, _How could I have been so fucking stupid for so_ _long? I've got to be the dumbest fucking son-of-a-bitch out there. Whatever made me think she'd never find out?_

He couldn't eat or sleep; he wouldn't play the piano or go to work. The half-shell of a man named Christian Grey wouldn't leave his home, the home he shared with Ana. He had no desire to. The memories of being abandoned by his crack whore of a mother washed back to him. He sat in a submissive position on the floor and wept feeling like that little copper haired four year-old again. His world had now come crumbling down around him like it had before but this time it was his own fault. Fifty shades his fault.

Nobody had heard or seen him for days. This worried one of the Security guards named Peterson. He had no idea what to do so he called the one person he knew of who would help and love him unconditionally. He called his mother Grace.

Grace rushed right over. She walked in and found a disheveled, cowardly human being sprawled out across the floor. She was aware that Ana had left him, taken her grandson with her and the incidences leading to why but this was her son. Tears welled in her eyes to find him in this horrid condition again. She came over and stood next to him; he quickly wrapped his arms around hers legs and clung on for dear life. He said nothing just closed his eyes and squeezed her tighter. Her lower lip quivered and tears streamed down her cheeks. She ran her fingers through his dirty hair. This was no more the strong man she'd raised. He had transgressed completely.

**Grace's POV**

Oh my poor Christian. Look at him. Nothing but a hollow mass of despair huddled on the floor. I've never seen him this distraught. True, he's only to blame for bringing this whole mess on himself but I'm still his mother. I have to help him if I can. I don't blame Ana for leaving him either. I'm sure I probably would have done the same if Carrick had pulled that to me, if he'd let infidelity ruin our marriage. I just wish I knew where she's gone or if she and Teddy are safe. My first obligation is to see if I can help fix Christian's psyche if it can be fixed so he can try to fix his marriage if indeed that can be fixed. I hope so though I hate to sound negative I have my doubts it can. Getting him mentally sound again I have a feeling will be like starting from square one. And it scares me. I so want the vigorous, confident take-charge no nonsense man again who despite the traumas and insecurities he's had to deal with in life already still has a deep love and concern for his family and not the weak lost frighten soul trembling at my feet. Oh my dear Christian, what have you done?

**Christian's POV**

Mommy, Mommy I've been bad. Hold me, Mommy. Hold me! I'm sorry Mommy, I'm so sorry. I promise I'll be good Mommy, I promise I'll be good. Please don't leave me Mommy. Please don't leave me! Help me Mommy. I don't know what to do.

**AA/N: I know it's not much but more drama will come later. Please let me know what you think.**


	3. Chapter 3

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 3

Revelations

Grace quickly calls Peterson to help her pick Christian up off the floor and walk him out to her white Cadillac. They put her whimpering child into the back seat and she strokes her fingers through his dirty copper hair. "Ssh now my sweet Christian," she softly murmurs, "You'll be okay." She pulls her Blackberry out of her purse and calls Elliott. "Hello, Elliott? Could you come over to the house? I'm going to need your help with something. You'll find out when you get there darling."

How Grace holds it together is a miracle. It pains her so to see her baby boy in such a deplored state. She takes a delicate hankie from her pocket to dry the moisture from her eyes, sits up straight and makes her way home to Bellevue. That woman is a rock, a true example of emotional control. Luck is with her as she makes nothing but 'green lights' all the way back. She arrives and Elliott meets her out front.

"Hey Mom, what can I do ya for?" he asks as she gets out of the car.

"I need help with your brother. He's had a complete and utter meltdown. Help me get him into the house."

"Can't say that I blame him under the circumstances. Here, put his arm around my shoulder." Elliott lifts his sibling out of the car and is shocked. Good God Ma, has he lost weight? He's awfully light for a man his size. And he doesn't smell too great either. Pooh wee!"

"I don't think he's eaten, had fluids or bathed in three days, that's how long the security guard says it's been since they've seen him come or go. His pulse rate is low too."

"Mom don't you think if he's in that bad a shape you should really take him to the hospital?"

They manage to carry an uncommunicative Christian inside and set him on the brown leather couch in the living room. His eyes were vacant and far away like he had no perception of time or space. "You know as well as I do the press would have a field day if news got out he was hospitalized for any reason! And if they knew it was that his wife left and took his child with her because he had an alleged affair with another woman he'd be ruined. I have everything I need right here at the house to tend to him: a portable heart rate monitor, IV solution, etc. Just help me get him up to his old room then go get a pair of your father's pajamas. The sooner we get him hooked up and comfortable the better. And Elliott, don't mention any of this to Kate!"

**Elliott's POV**

Just look at you, my stupid asshole of a bro! See what happens when you cheat on your wife. She leaves you and takes your kid with her. And Ana was great; she was your salvation. Now you're back to being as receptive as when Mom first brought you home at the age of four. You honestly thought you could keep that affair a secret? That Ana wouldn't find out? Dumb fucking idiot you are. I think Mom and Dad made a bet my marriage to Kate would fall apart before yours and Ana's. Speaking of Ana, I suppose it's due to your stalker tendencies that she's cut all communication from the family. Nobody's heard from her, not even Kate. She and Teddy have disappeared off the face of the earth and taken Taylor, Gail and Sawyer with her. Those three are probably just as pissed off as she is. Well at least if the five of them are together they're all safe and well fed. Unlike yourself little bro! I hope you realize starvation is not the solution here. Neither is dehydration or lack of proper hygiene. You need a bath and a shave ASAP so let's get you upstairs and get that taken care of. It's like having a skunk in the house! I do feel for you bro and I'll help however I can but you know it's gonna take a fucking miracle to straighten this mess you created of your marriage out. Hope you're willing to wait a long time 'cause that's how long it's gonna take if not forever to do it. If God is on your side and there is reconciliation with Ana, I have one word of advise for you: keep your dick in your pants!

**Kate's POV**

I could just kill that goddamn mother-fucking bastard, no wait, make that OTHER WOMAN fucking bastard! How could he do this to my best friend Ana! He said he loved her that she was the best part of him, of his life and he's right. She was and is and will always be far too good for that no good son-of-a-bitch. I never liked him before and I like him even less now if that's even possible! He broke poor Ana's heart and she didn't deserve that to happen. She gave him love and a child and permission to partake in kinky fuckery (yeah, yeah, yeah, I know all about it and the 'Red Room of Pain'. Ana told me when I discovered he was a Dom) and what did he do? He let his erection rule his common sense and started banging another woman when he should have been home banging Ana. He deserves every rotten thing that comes his way. Oh, he's gonna pay for this, he's gonna pay big time. He hurt her so bad she won't talk to anybody. I've been waiting patiently for her call but nada, nothing, not happening. I don't care if he is my brother-in-law, I detest him, hate him, detest him, hate him, detest him, hate him, detest… UGH! I hope she files for divorce and takes him for every penny he has! Christian Grey is nothing more than a gazillion dollar creep!

…

**Three Days Prior **

Ana sat at the kitchen counter eating her usual breakfast of granola and yogurt, trying her best to present a calm exterior when in reality a rage fueled by contempt and sheer hatred for her husband burned wildly deep inside. Last night she curled up with their son Teddy in his room for the idea of sharing Christian's bed sickened her. It was all she could do to fake a smile this morning and accept a kiss on the cheek before he left for work in his black Audi R8 without the urge to slap his face. Ana, along with Gail, Taylor and Sawyer waited until his car was safely out of sight before putting her long-thought-out plan of revenge into motion.

"Are you sure you want to go along with this?" she asked Jason. "I mean, you don't have to you know. He's been extremely good to you and your daughter Sophie through the years. I know your relationship means a great deal to him. That goes for you Gail and Sawyer too. He hurt me, not you. This is my battle not yours. Don't leave him if you don't want to."

" I think I can speak for all of us. When he cheated on you, when he broke your heart he broke ours too. Gail and I have been witness to his highs and lows, his crazy unpredictable mood swings and his just plain fuckedupness for too long! Sawyer, not as much. But we've had it. That's why we choose to go with you, Ana."

Sawyer adds, "I was hired to protect you and Teddy and that's exactly what I'm going to do."

Gail took four year old Teddy up to his room, gave him a coloring book and crayons to keep him occupied while she proceeded to pack up his toys, clothes, books etc. everything but the furniture. It pained her heart to have to do this but she needed to. When finished she went to her room pack up everything of hers. Taylor and Sawyer, both with heavy hearts tended to their own belongings. Ana had the hardest task of all. She went through her clothes, shoes, jewelry, sorting out every item that she had bought herself leaving behind what he had bought or given her. Surprisingly that was quite a bit.

Ana didn't bother going through the items in the bathroom or kitchen or any other room in the house. Whatever she needed she could purchase later. Sawyer and Taylor took the packed cardboard boxes downstairs and loaded them all in the back of a rented Ford SUV. She knew if they took the Audi it could be traced and she wanted none of that. Her laptop and Blackberry she left behind too but not before taking a hammer, smashing them to bits and tossing the remains into the dumpster. Ana was taking every precaution she could think of possible to prevent Christian from finding

her and Teddy.

The last thing she did before leaving this house was to take a manila envelope, place inside the shocking explicit pictures she'd received four weeks ago of a naked Christian in a hotel room with another woman. At first she doubted their credibility after all, her husband is always the perfect target for any type of scandal. Taylor did extensive research in hopes of discovering the reliability of the photos; if they were fakes, CGI or… To Taylor's disappointment his finding proved the photos to be legit. One mystery his research never resolved remains the most curious of all: who sent Ana the pictures?

It meant little to Ana who sent them now. They were solid proof that the man she loved and cared about had willingly deceived her. How could he be that despicable? Or clueless as to think he'd be able to keep this affair a secret… especially from her!

Also included in the manila envelope the three two-week notices from Taylor, Gail and Sawyer, her engagement and wedding rings and a note scribbled in her handwriting for her cheating husband's eyes to read. She sealed and set the envelope where she knew Christian would have little difficulty finding it: in the middle of the kitchen counter. Ana turned, walked out the door with tears forming in the corners of her eyes. Her lower lip quivered as she said a last farewell to the house she loved so much. She was off to start her life anew, a life having nothing to do with Christian Grey.

…

**Ana's POV **

I couldn't believe my eyes at first. Or didn't want to. The pictures… No, no. Not my Christian! He could never do anything like that to me! Would never do anything like that to me! Or so I thought. Evidently his infidelity has been going on for about two months. That's two months too long in my book. I need to get away, far away from here and from him. And I'm taking Teddy with me.

Had Christian really meant it when he told me I was all he needed, wanted and desired; that I meant the world to him? Or were they lies too? I guess five years of what I considered to be a happy marriage changed his perspective. I thought I had pulled him out of the darkest; showed him he was deserving of love; given him my trust, my devotion and a beautiful child. And what do I get in return? Fifty shades of a cheating husband, that's what. What other woman would put up with his constant mood swings and his fifty shades of fucked up. Make that fifty-one shades of fucked up now 'cause he just fucked up big time. It's going to cost him his fucking marriage and the possibility of ever seeing his son again.

Do I sound bitter? Damn straight! I think I have a right to be too. The other woman, she's my age and the splitting image of me: long brown hair, blue eyes and pale complexion. The only thing different is the name. Hers is Cassandra Zane. And mine is now mud. Kate tried to warn me about Christian but stupid me didn't listen. He beguiled me. I was caught up in his allure, his dazzling grey eyes. Our relationship was never about money or status, just him, his love. She was right about another fact too. Five months is not long enough to really get to know a person before marrying them But did I listen then either? No! Now I find I don't know him at all. Probably never have.

As far as I'm concerned Christian Grey can go back to the darkness, back to his sadist lifestyle, to his submissives, to the Red Room of Pain to beat little brown haired girls like Cassandra Zane with whips, canes and floggers, back to his horrible nightmares and to Elena "Mrs. Robison' Lincoln! Because I don't give a crap any longer about him! I've had it, I'm gone; I'm walking away. I hope Christian ends up misses me because he'll never see me again. And I never want to see him!

**Taylor's POV**

How do I go about describing my boss! He's a three-way oxymoron. Yeah that's right. A dumb-well educated-fool'! I've put up with a lot from that mother-fucker. Seen a lot too. I've been subjected to more displays of his ferocious temper than I care to shake a stick at, a few times aimed toward me personally. As for his uh, eccentric lifestyle choice is concerned, well, I could write a best selling book and make millions if it weren't for that damn NDA I signed. All those subs he had, each one a beauty! But kooky, some of them were damn kooky. He showed no feeling for any of them. Then Ana came into his life. She's the best thing that's ever happened to him aside from being adopted by the Grey's that is. Turned him clear around. Easy to tell they were meant for each other. So what in the hell provoked him to go do something as damn unforgivable as cheating on her? Sure their marriage ain't been a bed of roses lately say the last four months or so but hey, I'm positive they could have worked things out just like they used to by discussing matters out in the playroom, (hint, hint!). But even that room hasn't gotten a lot of wear and tear in a long time so maybe I'm wrong. Still, he shouldn't have stuck his Johnson into some other woman's garden unless he knew for sure! Ana's so angry and hurt she'll never take the miserable shmuck back now.

My heart goes out for Teddy the most mainly 'cause I know from experience what he's up against. My parents divorced when I was about his age, it's a very confusing way to grow up. Just like the boss, well ex-boss now is confusing. Damn bastard going to be devastated when he finds Ana and his kid have skipped town. He'll die. But still that asshole's gotta pay. That's why I hired Jenkins. Tough-as-nails like me. Still, he don't know the grey-eyed jerk like I do. Am I being too hasty though I'm mad as hell at him? Get a grip Jason, You're out of here and you know it! Well…

**Gail's POV **

To be honest I feel sorry for both Ana and Mr. Grey. He broke her heart just like my husband broke mine once so I know from experience what she's feeling like. The two of them have been so distant lately; makes me want to cry. Still it wasn't right what he did to her! It was downright terrible! It makes me sick just thinking about it! He's simply going to fall apart, maybe even have a heart-attack or worse attempt suicide when he discovers everyone has left him. That's been one of his worst fears since I've known him. He'll need someone. Maybe I shouldn't leave him right now. No, no, go with your husband, keep your marriage going. Mr. Grey has got to learn. But finding this is one hard lesson. He'll need comfort. But Ana needs comfort too and so does young Theodore. He's so innocent. I think I'm doing the right by leaving but there's still regret. Mr. Grey, I still care. Goodbye.

**Sawyer's POV**

I've worked here long enough to see a real change in Mr. and Mrs. Grey's relationship. Through the high points and the low points like this one. Pure disgusting what Mr. Grey did. I wouldn't dare do that to my boyfriend! I mean if even had one that is. I was hired to protect Mr. Grey I mean, Ana in the first place and I'm faithful. She and Teddy will need my protection more than ever now. That's why I'm leaving. God this situation sucks!

**Teddy's POV**

Where we going Mommy? Is Daddy coming too?


	4. Chapter 4

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 4

Transition

**A/N: I'm not the fastest writer so that's I'm always so tardy. Okay, here you go. I hope you like.**

Ana left with no set plan, no idea where she, Teddy and Sawyer would run to. It hadn't mattered really just as long as it was far away from Seattle and the Pacific Northwest. The first day was the hardest for Ana to endure. She found it difficult to relax due to the myriad of emotions (rage and disgust to name a few) she allowed to consume her. Worst one was the deep pain of guilt she felt when Teddy would enquire about his daddy. Her answer never appeased her son for long. Each time he'd asked her heart ached more and a lump formed in her throat. Who was she punishing more by her actions, Fifty, her son or herself?

To ease his young curiosity Ana told Teddy that his daddy sent them on an adventure. She began to believe it herself for that sounded much better than 'running away'. They took time with their traveling, decided not to hurry; stopped for meals, did a bit of sight-seeing; spent nights resting at nice little bed and breakfasts, readying to begin the routine over again the next morning. Ana had a great burden resting on her shoulders. She knew they couldn't live the 'vagabond' life forever but there'd been know interest to relocate in the towns and cities already visited.

Ana always had a love of the ocean; the taste of crisp salty air, the feel of sand squishing between her toes. Thoughts of taking long walks on the beach with her son, chasing waves as they came onto shore, building sand castles and listening to seagulls cry brought a smile to her face. Hmm, maybe that's the answer for Ana, to live somewhere near the shore, to start every morning staring out upon and feeling the serenity of the sea. The more she thought of the notion the more it appealed to her: a place near the beach where she and Teddy could live… and start lives anew…'Greyless'.

From the sound of Ana's yearning Sawyer knew exactly where she should reset her roots. He wanted her opinion and broached the subject at a little diner outside of Carmel, California where the three of them stopped for lunch. "And where's that?" asked Ana curiously as she stole one of her son's French fries.

"Cayucos, California." He answered, taking a chomp of his cheeseburger. "Its small, quaint easy access to anything you need. And I know the perfect beach house. Oceanfront too! You and Teddy are going to love it. I know I always did."

Ana nearly choked on a cherry tomato, "I didn't know you from California, Luke? What part?"

" Up and down Central coast from Santa Cruz to Santa Barbara counties and everywhere in between. That's where my family calls home and where they made fortune."

Ana listened at intently as mild mannered unpretentious Luke Sawyer, a man content to act as security guard for a Seattle billionaire's wife told how he himself comes from a family of considerable wealth and prestige, one worth billions; owns land up and down the coast including shopping malls, vineyards, horse ranches and more. His revelation floored her. "Wow! But whatever possessed you to move to Seattle and leave all that behind?"

"I was like you, Ana. I wanted more. I wasn't satisfied to live a lazy life and selfishly rely on my family's money for income. I wanted to experience hard work for myself. So I decided I'd use all those self-defense classes I'd taken to their best advantage. I went and learned how to shoot a gun then moved to Washington and as you know the rest is history."

"Yeah and now you're minus that income. You do realize I can't afford to pay you for guarding me and Teddy."

Luke simply giggled at Ana's 'tale of woe'." Yeah bummer huh! But I think I have the funds necessary to survive without it."

She found his suggestion interesting. "So, Cayucos huh? How far is that from where we are now?"

"Not far. A few hours drive. Trust me on this. You and Teddy are really going to like it there."

'Trust me'. Ana could vividly picture the man with the smoky gray eyes that pleaded for her faith five years ago only to take that faith and squash it like a bug. But Luke Sawyer spoke those words this time not Christian Grey. She washed ketchup off Teddy's face and hands then heaved a sigh, "I hope you're right. Okay, lead the way. Cayucos here we come."

Two and a half hours later, with Teddy 'sawing logs' in the back seat safely buckled into his booster seat and Ana not for one second straying her eyes from the beautiful California coastline, Sawyer makes a right hand turn then an immediate left into the driveway of an impressive two-story beach-house. "Here we are folks. Welcome to Cayucos and to 'Seahaven'."

Ana stepped out of the SUV awestruck, staring first at the charming structure in front of her eyes than at Luke. "Whose house is this?" she asked trying hard to keep her chin from dropping onto the cement.

Sawyer beamed with pride and blushed with humility. "Mine. I inherited from my Grandfather. Come with me, I'll show you the inside."

The inside was cozy but stylish. Certainly not your typical beach house! Clean, comfortable. And the view of the ocean was spectacular. Like you were 'Master of the Sea'. Marveled the one from Escala. There was easy access to the beach from the back deck too. And the sound of the waves crashing to the shore was as soothing as a lullaby. Ana loved it! She could defiantly see Teddy and her walking on the beach picking up seashells. "This place is awesome! Yes, I can definitely live in Cayucos. I'll have to find a beach house of my own though."

"God Ana, (she didn't want to be called Mrs. Grey anymore and Ms. Steele sounded so cold.) sometimes you can be so dense! I didn't bring you here to show it off I expect you and Teddy to live here. This is your new home if you'd like."

"What?" His kindness overwhelmed her. "Are you serious?" This was an offer way too good too refuse. "Yes of course! But you have to live here too. I'm still going to need security though why you would want to continue being that for me is ridiculous."

"If that's what you wish then I'd be honored."

Ana rolled her eyes. "Luke, I'm the one honored! I'm speechless at your generosity. Thank you. And you're right. You've sold me. Cayucos has two new residents…and one returning one!"

It was due to Sawyer's graciousness Ana and Teddy could afford a fresh start in life. No Christian; no Grey drama. It was a life more to her liking. She herself got a new persona. Goodbye Anastasia Grey, hello to simple Anne Steele. Gone was the long chestnut brown hair. She lightened it and cut it short. Her pale complexion tanned. She was happy and relaxed. And so was Teddy.

…

Meanwhile Christian's life took a turn for the worse. He stopped talking, acted sullen like back when he was a teenager; became angry, bitter. Cared nothing for personal relationships. What was the use? Nobody was ever going to top Ana. His music saddened but his business thrived. Christian became a cold, hard no-nonsense businessman like before who wasn't about to take crap off anyone but secretly yearned for a young clumsy college student named Anastasia Steele to come stumbling into his office again.

Those horrible nightmares returned. They affected him deeper though; more intense than before. At times he'd see his crack-whore mother lying there next to him lifeless, cold and dead to his touch. Other times it would be Ana's face he saw. That caused him the most agony. Then there were times when it was his face he'd see. He'd waked up each time sweating profusely, trembling, screaming out Ana's name hoping she'd comfort him and make them go away; reaching over to pull her close to him but grasping on to an empty space. He felt scared and abandoned again.

He found himself slipping back into the darkest just like before, the light disappearing from his soul. Except for that part of his being where the light refused to dim. He was determined never to return to the BDSM lifestyle. Ana showed him the way out so he vowed not to go back. She'd be disappointed if he did.

That didn't mean the Red Room of Pain never got used. It did. Only the occupancy was one. Christian would take the whips, floggers, paddles and canes and beat himself senseless trying to find any type of pleasure possible from the pain he was faced to endure.

Christian was a man dying of loneliness, regret and remorse. He needed his Ana again to make him whole, to bring joy and laughter back into his life. There was a void without her presence and he made a promise to fill that void. He'd search the ends of the earth for her; he was determined to find her, to bring her back. That was his goal now. To win back his Ana's heart.

…

Anne (Ana) was thrilled with her life now it was easy, uncomplicated. She loved to sit on the beach and bask in the sun while little Teddy gained great enjoyment in burying poor Sawyer in the sand. There was laughter and new friendships by the names of neighbors Alison Cantrall and Trudy King. Ali (that's what Alison preferred to be called) lived in the large blue beach house on the right hand side with her husband Nathan. She was an interior decorator and her home proved it: very eclectic, stylish but still comfortable. Loved to collect antiques. "…like my husband." The tall, blond, middle thirties woman would always joke about seeing that he was early fifties. Anne felt with her a special kinship, as she knew what it was like to have a filthy rich husband too.

Trudy was different in many ways from Ali all that Anne could easily relate to. She was the same age, an only child from a broken home, brunette and loved good literature. Other than that Trudy was short, chunky had two young children a few years older than Teddy and she jolly as hell: a happy personality that put a permanent smile on your face. She and her husband Tony, a chef at one of the nicest restaurant in town, lived across the street in a very simple beige two-story house with a boat parked in the driveway and a Golden Retriever named Ralph. Trudy became Anne best friend and confidant sort of like Kate was what seemed like a lifetime ago.

Anne discovered she had a unique gift with flowers. Trudy, the friend that she is picked up on her special talent and got her a job at La Petite Florale the finest flower shop in town as a flower arranger. Anne couldn't have been happier for the opportunity because sitting around the beach house all day with nothing to do was getting to be a pain in the ass!

Trudy was more than happy to watch Teddy on the days Anne and Sawyer (still her bodyguard. One never knows now does one) would go to her job. Her confidence soon bloomed like many of her beautiful arrangements. This was just what she needed to thrive.

But amid all the joy there were problems. Some nights Anne had nightmares coincidently involving Christian. They kept her up at night interfering with much needed rest. She felt unusually tired; achy and nauseous, couldn't hold anything down. Her color waned too. She assumed she must have developed some kind of allergy. Since she hadn't the chance to find her own physician Trudy took Anne to see hers. Dr. Harper was a gentle woman, reminded her of Grace. After a thorough testing: blood, urine, etc. Anne found the cause of her ailments.

She wasn't please with the results and cried on Sawyer's shoulder when she got home. "Oh God Luke the last thing I expected was to be pregnant!"

"With Christian's baby huh?"

"Uh, maybe." She frowned.

Sawyer scratched his head. "I don't understand."

Anne plopped down on the couch. "It's simple. I have to see the sonogram first."

"I still don't understand what you're saying."

Anne took a deep breath. "Christian wasn't the only one having an affair. He was just the only one stupid enough to be caught!"


	5. Chapter 5

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 5

The truth can set you free

**A/N: Please, please, please forgive me! My last intention was to upset you the fans of my stories. I will admit the last chapter was a shocker huh? But that's what I intended on …shock value. I'm sure it has caused me to lose some followers and again I apologize. The whole 'hypocrisy' issue will be explained early on in this chapter. And no, I have not strayed from my story's text. I am sorry I gave everyone a heart attack and I hope this chapter makes up for it.**

What Ana told Sawyer paled his suntan skin.

"No wait Luke! It wasn't really an affair, more like a one-night stand!" She exclaimed trying to explain herself and bring color back to his ghostly complexion. "And I hated myself afterwards." She leaned forward, put her chin in her hands, took a heavy sigh and continued.

"You see, I was in denial with the first set of pictures. I told myself, "Not my Christian! He'd never do that to me!" And I ignored them. But when I received the second set of pictures I went ballistic! I mean they were really bad. I wanted to cut off Christian's balls and hang them over the rearview mirror like a pair of fuzzy dice! I was so furious I just got in my car and drove. Ended up at a bar. Went inside and started downing shots. I don't even know what I was drinking I just wanted the hurt to go away.

"And then this guy came and sat next to me. And boy, was he gorgeous, I mean Christian Grey gorgeous! I don't even remember his name. Carl, Conner, Cameron. Beats me! We kept downing shots together and getting more wasted. The more I drank the hornier I became. The next thing I know I'm following him up to his suite. After that everything's a blur. Hell, I don't even know if we had intercourse! My guess is we passed out. But is we did it was uneventful. Anyone after Christian would be. Once you've tasted filet minion it's hard to go back to hamburger.

"When I came to and realized what I had done, I put what little clothes I had taken off back on and got the hell out of there. I've never been so ashamed of myself in my life. How I got home safely is a miracle. I woke up on the couch in the morning with the worst hangover in the world! Thank God Gail got me through it. Here's some advice for you Luke: never drink when you're angry, full of rage and horny. They're not good combinations!

"It wasn't until Taylor confirmed the pictures were legit that I decided to leave and take Teddy with me. I wanted Christian to pay big time for his indiscretion and I guess mine as well. I didn't mean for you, Gail and Taylor to leave though. He only cheated on me, not the three of you! So…

"Now I'm pregnant and 99.9% sure it's Christian's baby. Whatever made me think I could just take off and leave to live my life 'Christian free?' What a fuckin' joke that was!" Ana slumped her shoulders and looked like a dejected puppy, "I know you're disgusted with me Luke but not as much as I am with myself. Please don't hate me."

"I don't hate or am disgusted with you. If anything I admire what you did. It took real guts. Ana let me reassure you right now you did not force me to leave! I left on my own free will. It was solely my decision to make. I can't speak for Gail and Taylor but I feel I made the right choice. I don't regret it one bit."

"Hmm. Speaking of Taylor and Gail, I wonder how they're doing?"

"They're probably fine. Jason told me he was buying a fifth wheel and Gail and he were going to tour the U. S. in it. Whatever they're doing, wherever they are, I'm sure they're happy."

Ana moaned, "I hope so."

…

**Two months later**

**The Taylors**

Jason and Gail have been having the time of their lives touring the country in their Fleetwood RV. Simply taking time to enjoy the beauty of nature and the sights of this great nations brings them peace and tranquility. Quite different from constantly being on-guard, looking over your shoulder for some crazy loony-toon making threats on your bosses life. 5:30pm in a RV park in Jackson, Wyoming Gail's fixing 'her man' his dinner. She sighs heavily as she hands him his plate. Her look of grief does not go unnoticed.

"Hey dollbaby," he says, stroking her chin, "what's bothering ya?"

"It's just whenever I fix this I think of him. My macaroni and cheese was always his favorite."

Jason stops amid his third forkful, "Still having regrets huh?"

She looks at him; her sad eyes that tells the whole story. "Uh, huh."

"Me too," he laments, "I miss the sick bastard. What I wouldn't give to hear that fucker growl my name."

"I want to go back Jason!" Gail pleads, "Don't get me wrong, this has all been great! I've seen so much in the last two months more than I ever imagined. It's just that, that …"

"I know. I'm going ape-shit stir-crazy dying from boredom as well. I think we need 'Grey mania' back in our lives to feel useful again."

"Do you think he'd gives us our jobs back?"

Jason gave his wife an incredulous look. "Would you? What we did to Mr. Grey was pretty fuckin' shitty! I wouldn't blame him if he never wanted to see our sorry mugs again! What an asshole I was not listening to my better judgment and turning right back around but I was too pissed that day to think clearly. Yeah what he did to Ana was despicable but we did something far worse to him. The son-of-a-bitch has abandonment issues and what do we do? We abandon him! Ana doing it was bad enough, But he didn't deserve us doing it too."

"Well if nothing else lets just go back to Seattle. I miss it. And I bet you miss Sophie. Then we can work on a plan to get back into his good graces. I really don't care if he hires us back again I just want to see Mr. Grey."

"Same here. First thing in the morning we turn this tank around and head for home." He begins to chuckle, " At lease we don't need to find a place to live, we have one!"

Like Taylor promised after a hearty breakfast of a Denver omelet, hash browns, bacon and sourdough toast he and Gail headed back the next morning for Seattle unaware that the mellow man they long to see again is not the one they left behind but the dark sullen soul of five years earlier before he met Ana.

…

**Christian**

After firing the second housekeeper in the short time of only two months for doing her job unsuitable to his expectations Christian storms out of Escala toward the waiting Audi SUV to head for Grey Enterprises. Joe Perkins, his latest bodyguard, holds the car door open and greets him 'good morning'. Christian doesn't acknowledge him, he never does. Just mumbles quietly under his breath. Immediately upon sliding inside he grabs his Blackberry. "Grey!" he growls. "The fucker did what? No, don't do anything until I get there. I'll handle this myself." He is always distant; shows now emotion, everyday acting like he pissed off at the whole damn world.

He darts into the building ignoring all his staff and heads for his office in fierce silence. Walking pass his assistant Andrea who tries valiantly to grab his attention, He enters his office, slams the door behind him hard enough to break the glass window then sit at his desk. His hand reaches for the small picture frame sitting on his desk, a ritual he does every morning and gently rubs the glass. It's a picture of Ana, Teddy and he taken at a much happier time, Teddy's first birthday the only thing that has the magic to change the bitter CEO into a hopeful one. "I'll find you my loves, I can make it up to you. Ana, you'll see just give me the chance. I can be the man you fell in love with again, you'll see."

An annoying buzz from Andrea turns his mood harsh again. "What?" he bellows.

" It's your mother sir, she like to see you."

Naturally Christian will not refuse a visit from his mother. She saved him a second time and the only person he'll remove his blanket of despair for. "Send her in Andrea."

Grace enters and it's as if Christian has seen sunlight for the first time today. His genuine wide smile matches hers. "Good morning my darling."

"Hi Mom. How can I help you?" He walks from behind his desk to give her a hug.

"I'd like to invite you to dinner tonight and every night after that until you find a replacement for Bernice."

"Oh. Good news travels fast huh?" he sighs, taking a seat on the nearest desk corner.

"Actually I found out quite accidentally when I stopped by Escala and found her running hysterically from the elevator."

"Thanks for the invitation but I think I'll…"

Before he had a chance to fully reject her mother's kindness Grace spoke up. "I know you're a grown man and I haven't the right to ask but I've found you scared and malnourished twice for far. I don't think I can take a third!"

She made too good of a point and he readily conceded. "Six o'clock okay and I bring the wine?"

"Absolutely perfect! I must get to the hospital now. See you tonight."

He kissed her cheek before she walked out the door and within seconds of her leaving his dark mask returned. That stoic persona took over and refused to leave even during his visit with Flynn.

…

Every session with Dr. Flynn starts out the same. Christian comes into his office, sits down on the dark brown leather couch leans against the back, crosses his legs and stares out the window not uttering a word. Flynn hates getting paid for an hours worth of silence; he feels like he taking advantage of his client. But he's learned from past experience with Christian Grey turning a brick wall into a chatterbox takes plenty of time and patience. He hopes today might show some improvement.

"Well hello Christian. You're looking well."

A roll of his eyes and a curt "Whatever."

Flynn folds his hands in his lap."Is there anything special you'd like to tell me today?"

After a long silence Christian softly mutters, "I just want her back."

"You mean, Ana."

He nods quietly and continues to stare out the window.

"What would you tell her if she did come back?"

His lower lip starts to gently quiver, "That I've missed her and Teddy. I want more than anything to make it up to her." A renegade tear escapes the corner of his right eye.

"How would you go about doing that Christian?"

"By regaining her trust."

"You do know that's not going to be an easy task."

He bows his head and swallows hard, "I know." he whispers.

"What if you can't get her back?"

"What are you trying to say?" He looks panic-stricken and runs his fingers through the sides of his hair "I-I have to!"

"Christian, certainly it must have occurred to you at some point that Ana might not want to come back. That she may not want_ you_ back."

Flynn's words stabs his heart like shards of glass. Another long silence until a single weak reply escapes his lips. "Yes."

"Would you blame her if she didn't?"

An agonizing pain hangs heavy in Christian's chest. "No." he answers in a faint whisper.

Christian clams up again. Flynn feels skeptical to delve further regarding his affair; that those delicate questions can wait until later sessions.

"Back to Ana. I want you to know Christian, I did not ask you those question to discourage you from continuing your search for her. I simply wanted you to be aware of the options you might have to face once and if you do find her. I still feel there's a glimmer of hope."

At last he shows a positive response. His eyes glance over at Flynn filled with promise.

"One more subject I'd like to broach today is your attitude toward others. Why the need to be so bitter?"

Christian's mood turned 180 degrees. "It's a release okay!" he snaps. "It's the only way I know how!"

"What about…"

"You mean BDSM? I vowed never to go back to that lifestyle and I'm keeping that promise! Ana wouldn't want me to and I've disappointed her enough already! Look, I don't want to discuss it any longer. I think we're through for the day."

"If that's what you wish. I do think we've made progress today Christian."

He rises and snorts, "Whatever."

Christian walks out of Flynn's office still feeling a mess of conflict and confusion. One thing is crystal clear to him though. Even if she might not want him back he will never stop looking for Ana.


	6. Chapter 6

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 6

Admissions

**A/N: Again, please forgive me for my late update. I hope you like this chapter. Thank you. And may I say I love your reviews. They're so encouraging. I love them all.**

Ana had it confirmed two days later she is definitely pregnant. And it's a girl. She couldn't help but garner mixed feelings one, being relief that the father is not some one-night-stand drunk whose name is nothing more than a forgotten slur, the other remorse for this baby whom she loves and cherishes so dearly is an innocent reminder of the cheater she'd rather forget existed.

Her friends Trudy, Ali and boss Vivian admit that at five and a half months pregnant she's positively glowing and never looked healthier; that pregnancy agrees with her and from what they can ascertain Luke is thrilled at the prospect of becoming a daddy again! No reason for the three of them to suspect he not the father seeing as they already think Teddy is his child and he and Ana are happily married. This devoted man's given Ana his solemn vow never to divulge the father's true identity and as long as she desires him to he's more than happy to keep on with the 'parental illusion'. There's a huge matter in Ana's life he's torn over. On one hand he'd love for her and Christian to reconcile; to put the past behind and start their lives fresh again back in Seattle. On the other Luke can see too how happy Ana is, how much she's prospered and blossomed into her own, independent of the controlling influences that is the main of Christian's world.

7:00am: Ana deems it the perfect time to take a walk on the beach. She tries to every morning not just for the great exercise but a chance to clear her mind, lessen the stress level and give her inner peace. The sound of the waves crashing; the fresh salty smell in the air; the feel of the crisp wind against her skin all have a calm, serene affect on her. She loves the fact she can wave at people who are walking their dogs or fly-fishing or the few early surfers crazy enough to put on wetsuits to brave the freezing cold ocean (Burr! always gives her the shivers!) without worry or the need to be alarmed or constantly looking over her shoulder in fear.

There's a heavy load on Ana's shoulders this morning one that will only grow in tonnage as the next three and a half months pass by: whether or not to tell a soul in Seattle about the baby. It's a conflict deep within her heart she must deal with on a daily basis. She sits next to Luke on the outdoor decking sulking and staring down into her tea mug preying to find from him some solace. "If you were me what would you do Luke?"

"I don't know." he shrugged, "Obviously I've never been put in that position. You came from a broken home, how did that make you feel?"

"Lousy." she frowns.

"See? Do you want your children to feel the same way you did?"

"Are you suggesting I forgive Christian? Sorry, I'm not ready to do that yet!" she snaps. "I don't care if it _has_ been three months, if he only knew how much that hurt and humiliated me to find out he had an affair when all he preached to me was 'Oh Ana, you're more than enough woman for me, I don't need anyone else'. Yeah, right! What a bunch of bullshit that turned out to be!"

"True, but at some point the Greys need to be told. You can't keep this baby a secret from them forever, Ana."

She grew silent regarding the subject knowing full well Luke was right. He helped her to stand up as she mentioned about wanting to take a shower. Taking an ambling pace toward the bathroom Ana ignored the sudden small twinge of pain she felt assuming it to be nothing more than gas. She entered and headed straight for the shower turned the water on to get to just the right temperature: pleasantly hot to sooth her sore muscles. A glance in the mirror made her take notice. The reflection alarmed her of the dark circles under her eyes due to restless nights and nightmares, mostly regarding Christian; the vague expression of doubt and worry on her face and the obvious sign of depression. All in all, she looked like shit.

She took a heavy sigh striped off her clothing and walked in the shower thoroughly ready to enjoy the feel of pulsating liquid beads massaging away the painful muscles. Suddenly visions in her mind caused her to sink down on the tile floor and begin to weep. Could be the hormones or the fact she truly missed a certain someone.

All washed, clean, ready to start the day on a lighter note Ana hears a knock on the door. It is a frazzled looking Trudy. She comes inside wringing her hands, "Oh Ana, my mother's had a stroke! They've taken her to French Hospital. I wouldn't normally ask but I wondered if you or your husband (like I mentioned before, everyone things they're married) might drive me into San Luis Obpisbo. I'm just too nervous a wreck to drive myself."

"Calm down Trudy," she said wrapping her arms around her friend's shoulders. "Everything will be fine. We'll all go. It'll give us a chance to get out of the house. I'll get Teddy and Luke will drive. I won't be long." She was back in an instant with Teddy in her arms, "Ready? Let's go." The four of them scrambled into the Ford SUV, buckled in and headed off toward CA-1 for their twenty- minute drive to SLO and French Hospital.

Poor upset Trudy. Ana held her hands trying to console her; letting her nervously chat away the entire ride. Thanks to Luke's expert driving skills they arrived quicker and a good thing too for Ana's ear needed a rest. Luke helped them out of the car, took hold of Teddy's hand and followed behind Ana and Trudy through the thick glass doors into the hospital's comfortable lobby. He opted to wait there in the waiting area with the young child as the two women took the elevator upstairs to the second floor.

Mrs. Peta Nelson, rm. SW-10 rest quietly in her bed. She stirred and smiled when they arrived happy to see her daughter Trudy's face and visa-versa. After a short introduction Ana excused herself so they could talk. She walked down the aisle not watching where she was going and haphazardly bumped into someone at the Nurses station. She looked up to apologize to a person she least expected to see especially in her condition.

"Ana, is that you?"

"Grace? What are you doing here?"

…

**A session with Dr. John Flynn**

Today is yet another session with Christian. It's been three months and the man is still a mess over his wife leaving. I've gotten him to open up a little bit but with an individual with his troubled past prying any information takes time. He's yet to mention or offer any information regarding the cause of his marital distress: the affair. I pray if I'm insistent enough this session will be a turning point. I feel in order for him to move forward he needs to be able to address and come to terms with the delicate issue of his infidelity. By my watch he should be here in about ten minutes but knowing Christian like I do he'll be early.

And just as I suspected here he comes now, stern face and brooding as usual.

"Good morning Christian. How are you doing?"

And also as I expected about as receptive as a shellfish as he silently plops down on the sofa. Finally I get a shrug out of him. "How do you think!"

"I think you're frustrated, angry and lonely. But you didn't need me to tell you that."

Like always he squirms in his seat and frowns a sign he's starting to relax.

"Christian, I know this is going to be hard but one thing you've yet to mention is the affair. Why?"

When I think I've hit a brick wall I hear him mumble a response, "I'm too fucking ashamed."

"Can you tell me what prompted the affair?"

He looks straight ahead with a vague expression "Our marriage…Ana and me…we were fighting everyday. First about little things then big things soon it didn't matter. Sometimes ending up in screaming matches. We were growing apart…distant. There was hardly any intimacy. We'd go to bed angry not touching… if we slept in the same bed that is. Sometimes Ana would go sleep in the guest room or with Teddy. It, it didn't feel like a marriage any longer. I had lost control, of Ana, of our relationship. I needed it back, I needed to feel in control again."

"Control always has been a big issue for you Christian. Didn't you and Ana ever talk about your marital issues?"

"I tried, I wanted to but between both our work schedules there wasn't any time left and when I did finally have a chance to broach the subject she was in denial told me I was mistaken that our marriage was fine. How can a marriage be fine if there's no communication?"

"I see your point. How did you cope?"

"By staring at the bottom of a glass full of scotch. Every night after work I'd stop off at a bar and have a drink or two. Not get drunk, just enough to deal."

"Is this where you met the other woman?"

He looks humiliated; hangs his head in shame. "Yes. One night I was finishing my second glass when she came up to the bar and sat next to me. She looked like Ana, soft brunette hair, pale blue eyes, light complexion and full red lips. That's all I saw at first, Ana. Even when she told me her name was Cassie all I could see was Ana. Ana, Ana, Ana. We started talking and click! we hit it off… like when I first met Ana. We'd meet each other at the bar every night and just talk and drink. It felt good, like I was talking my problems over with Ana. Only someone was actually listening."

"How long after until the relationship became physical, intimate in nature?"

"Not until she brought it up. One night she'd gotten a little too wasted, leaned against the bar and said, _"I want you to fuck me tonight Christian. I bet you fuck just the way I like it too, nice and hard. Come on how about it, please? Lets go upstairs so you can pound me until my ass is black and blue the next morning."_ Despite the fact I had a severely hard cock at the time I declined her offer. On the way home that night I got to thinking about the times when I felt the most in control, the most powerful. I longed for that feel outside of the office again. I had Welch run a background check on her, Cassandra Zane. It showed nothing suspicious. I decided since I had no intention of ever taking her to Escada I drew up a new type of NDA for her to sign. I took her out to dinner one night the next week and we discussed an arrangement. She signed without even reading the two pieces of paper. I think she was just eager for me to fuck her is all. So I did, that night at a little hotel on the outskirts of Seattle. I signed under one of my assumed names thinking it'd be more esoteric that way."

He seems to enjoy getting this out of his system; like a heavy boulder lifted from his shoulders. I am glad he decided to share. "How did it make you feel afterward?"

"Great!" he smirked, "I felt strong, powerful… in control. I felt better able to face the shitfest at home.

"In other words you felt like a Dominant again."

Christian becomes silent, confused by my allegation. Reacting as if hearing an epiphany. "Yes."

"So she was your submissive?"

"No!" He cries out at first. "No. I mean, maybe. It never felt like… "

"Was she into the kinky sex at all?"

"No! There was no BDSM! Except… maybe for the handcuffs she brought. But no whips or floggers, nothing like that!"

"During those two months did you garner any emotional attachment to this woman say fondness…love?"

He starts running his fingers through his hair a sign of frustration. "NO!" he hisses, "That woman meant nothing to me! I was not fucking that woman I was fucking Ana! Ana was sucking my cock! It was Ana I was spanking! I was in control of Ana! I love only Ana!" He's broken down sobbing. "I miss my Ana! I want my Ana back! I need my Ana back! Oh God Ana where are you? I'm so sorry! Please, please Ana, come back to me!"

That emotional outcry puts an end to our session. I don't think he can take any more questions. But I will tell Christian we made a great breakthrough. Maybe he'll even believe me.


	7. Chapter 7

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 7

By Coincidence

**A/N: I apologize for posting late. Sometimes things get in the way. But here you are. I hope you like it. Reviews (even bad ones. But I hope I don't receive many!) are greatly appreciated. Here you go, chapter 7…finally! **

Ana collected herself from the shock of a lifetime having bumped into someone so unexpected. "Grace, what are you doing here?"

The look of exhilarated joy shone bright in Grace's kind eyes. She threw her arms around and hugged Ana tightly like she were a long lost friend not a runaway daughter-in-law whom some women might consider the worst possible pond scum. "Oh Ana, it's so good to see you." She pulled back, looked at Ana's delicate condition but said nothing, just smiled wide with elation.

"Thank you. You too." Ana managed to reply sheepishly while stood frozen stiff in one spot pondering over the most natural of questions: What was her mother-in-law doing here?

Needless to say this was a very awkward reunion!

She kept biting her lower lip as Grace looked her over from worried blue eyes to growing belly. There was a squeamish uneasiness that showed on her face and knotted hands. Ana wanted nothing more than to cut the dreaded silence that hung between the two of them with a Ginzu knife. She sighed, glanced downward so not to look Grace in the face and stammered, I, I h-had every intention of calling and telling you about the baby it's just I…"

Grace put her hand up a signal for Ana to halt. "That's okay dear I understand. Look, I'd really like the chance to go somewhere and catch up, maybe over a coffee. Do you have the time?"

The trustful woman standing in front of her (and if one thing Grace is, it's trusting) seemed desperate to talk. Ana, though still reluctant for any 'Grey contact', agreed. She never could deny this lovely lady anything. "Sure. Just let me go tell Trudy I'll be downstairs in the coffee shop." After a few minutes she returned and they headed toward the elevator together. "You can see Teddy then. He's waiting in the lobby with Sawyer. I know he'll be over -the-moon to see you and visa-versa I'm sure." They entered the first one that opened. Ana approached her mother-in-law with a problem that's been heavy on her mine a long while. "Uh, May I ask a favor of you first? I realize you may not want to but Teddy sometimes asks about Christian, a lot actually and I'm running out of excuses. Could you help me? He's still so young I don't think he can handle the truth yet. Sounds selfish I know."

"No, no. I'll be happy too." Grace said excited to be seeing her grandson again. "It doesn't sound selfish, not to me it doesn't."

Ana felt a twinge of relief but not for long. As expected the second Teddy laid eyes on Grace he ran into her arms yelling "Gram Gram." Hugs, kisses and twirls in the air ensued. Ana's eyes began to well up with tears of guilt but held strong not letting a single drop fall onto her cheek. But she faltered. Two tears managed to escape from the corners of her eyes. She felt horrid.

As was prepared for Grace answered Teddy's question regarding Christian. She held the façade by informing him his daddy's been busy out of the country but asks about him everyday. That did the job by satisfying the child's curiosity. She suggested Sawyer take him for ice cream while she talks with his mommy. His face lit up like a Christmas tree. Ice cream, especially chocolate, is his favorite. Grace put him down; the gleeful little boy immediately took hold of Sawyer's hand and both disappeared out the glass doorway. She next went to put a comforting arm around the shoulders of a very stoic Ana and smiled, "Come, lets go sit down."

The smell of freshly brewed coffee alone was enough of an incentive to enter the hospital's bright sunlit coffee shop, the chance to catch up with each other another. They found a nice corner table and Grace helped her pregnant daughter-in-law sit down. A young red-haired waitress promptly came over, "May I get you ladies anything to drink?"

Grace ordered a decaf coffee, while Ana, biting her lip in nervous desperation, not knowing how to go about asking the woman across from her an ever so gnawing question, ordered her usual tea. "Grace," she began as calmly a possible, "it's good to see you but please, tell me, how come you're here in San Luis Obispo, California and not in Seattle, Washington?"

"A group of doctors, pediatricians mostly, from up and down the Pacific coast, I lucky to be one of them, were invited to visit several different hospitals pediatric wards in and about the coastal region. French Hospital happens to be one of them. And believe me, I'm just as surprised as you must be that we ran into each other! Talk about a small world huh? So please, I'm anxious. Tell me all about the baby."

Ana shrugged her shoulders and gave a sigh, "Not much to tell really: a little girl due the middle of November. Of course we needn't have to guess who the father is."

"No I suppose not." chuckled Grace.

Their exuberant waitress quickly returned with their order, and set the cups on the table, "Will there be anything else I can get you?" she politely asked. With a 'no' from both she turned to leave them to their visit .

"I must say," Grace continued taking a sip of coffee, "that you look just wonderful! A little tired perhaps but I'm sure pregnancy isn't the only reason why. It must have come as quite a shock to discover you were."

"Lord you have no idea!" Ana exclaimed, rolling her eyes. "Under these delicate circumstances, not the first thing I wanted or needed to hear!"

"I can see your point. It wouldn't have been the easiest thing for me to deal with either! So, other than the obvious how's life treating you?"

"Good! Never better. And you?" Before Ana gave her a chance to reply, her worried eyes searched Grace's in a desperate plea, "I know there's every reason why you should but please, I beg of you, don't hate me for running away like I did."

"I don't hate you." she said kindly taking Ana's hand in hers, "If anything I applaud your courageousness. I admire your tenacity. Not many people would have had the guts to do what you did. No one has ever walked away from…" She knew not to go any further; not wishing to upset Ana by the mere mention of Christian's name.

Relieved, Ana finally took a sip of her tea. "Thank you but I'm neither brave nor strong." she scoffed, "If I am then I wouldn't have fled in the first place. I know it's been three months but I'm sorry, I'm still not able to forgive Christian. Who knows if I ever will? There's a wound in my heart so deep that Grace, it may never heal. He was supposed to be my Fifty and no one else's. I remember someone telling me once I wasn't enough for him that he'd end up finding a woman who was. Silly me didn't listen then and now I wish I had."

"Whoever told you was mistaken. I agree my son's weakness was atrocious and inexcusable. I would have done the same as you had it been Carrick."

"No. You're wrong. Carrick wouldn't have given you any reason to. He, unlike Christian didn't have any fucked-up shit to deal with."

She knew better but Grace could not keep the anguish she felt bottled inside any longer. Her lower lip began to tremble, "He's grown dark again, Ana." she cried, "Mean, cruel, insensitive, short-tempered like before he met you.

Not with me, or with the immediate family, but he is to everyone else. The light you brought to his heart is gone. Oh Ana it's so hard to watch, like reliving all those years him growing up, only much more so. I'm in a quandary. I don't know what to do. Every day he looks more lost. I only hope and pray he doesn't get to the point where he'll choose that sadistic lifestyle again."

"Please Grace stop! Don't tell me any more. I don't want to hear it! Yes, I feel your pain and I know how much you must be hurting, after all, he's your son. But there's nothing I can do. I'm not the one to bring him out of his darkness this time! I'm not the same Ana who first showed Christian he could be loved. That girl is gone! She's moved on, made a new life for her and for Teddy. Believe it or not I'm happy here in California. I can walk down the street without fear of some maniac wanting to harm me, or the paparazzi following my every move. I couldn't do that in Seattle." Ana glanced up to see her friend Trudy waving at her from the hospital lobby. "Look Grace, I've got to go now."

They both rose from the table. Grace gently brushed a few stray strands of hair away from Ana's face. "I think you're wrong Ana. I think you are that same girl. The same girl who fell in love with a man who never thought he deserved it. It's just going to take time for you to realize it. And when you do I hope you come back."

Ana put her arms around Grace and hugged her affectionately. "I love you Grace, I always will. You're like a second mother to me. But, I have a tremendous favor to ask of you. Please don't tell Christian you saw me. I'm sure he's been searching, driving Welch crazy all these past months hoping to find me and knowing him like I do, he'll never stop until he does. To be honest with you I wish he'd stop. Because I don't want to be found."

Grace was taken aback by her bold statement, "Ana, I believe deep down inside your soul there's a feeling that still wants to be. We all dream of that knight-in-shining-armor who comes to our rescue saves from a fateful doom and protects us from evil. That includes you." She notices Trudy growing impatient. "It looks as if your friend needs you so I guess it's time we say goodbye. You have no idea how much I've enjoyed our talk." She kissed Ana's cheek. "I love you too. You are so special to me and always will be. Please give Teddy a kiss for me. Take care of not only yourself now Ana but of my little baby granddaughter. I do hope we get to see each other again." With a heavy heart knowing full well this might be the last time she'd ever see her daughter-in-law, she turned and walked toward the elevators.

"Who was she?" asked Trudy, "Seems like a nice enough person."

Ana felt a huge lump form in her throat. "She is, in every way. She's my… a dear old friend whom I'm going to miss very much."

…

**A few weeks later**

**Taylor and Gail **

Christian comes storming out of the bedroom this Wednesday morning impeccably dressed as always in a signature white linen shirt, gray designer suit and today sporting a dark blue tie. He is stern faced as is now normal, bitter and mad-at-the-world. His Blackberry lately takes the blunt of his ire. "Barton!" he growls, "Get in here now!

"Barton's not here sir." Says Connor, one of his other security guards.

He grumbled, "For fuck sakes why?"

"He got a call that his wife's been rushed to the hospital. She's about to give birth. But I was able to find a replacement."

"That quickly huh" Well send him up."

"Yes sir. And sir, there's a woman here about the housekeepers position."

Christian stood looking out at the Seattle skyline, his voice reeked of annoyance, "Oh, alright. Send her up too!"

Suddenly two, both familiar to his ears voices rang free, "You're a sight for sore eyes Mr. Grey."

"Do you still eat egg white omelets and love macaroni and cheese?"

Jason? Gail? His eyes widened, afraid of the possibility his mind was out to deceive him. What would he say if he turned around to discover they were not figments of his imagination but two real honest to goodness living breathing human beings standing there in the foyer all smiles waiting to receive and dole out handshakes and hugs? Would he treat them like he would a member of the family with warmth and sincerity or like everybody else he happens to meet with a brash insensitivity so customary for a cold-hearted asshole he's let himself become?

"_What are you two doing here?" he sneered harshly._

"_We hear you're looking for a bodyguard and housekeeper and we'd like to apply for the positions."_

"_Oh yeah? You want me to just hire you back just like that huh? Why? So you can abandon me all over again? How stupid do you think I am? Leave my sight now!"_

"_But, but sir, Mr. Grey…"_

"_I said leave, NOW! And don't ever come back!" _

Though they deserved every bit of his wrath for deserting him like they did Christian thought twice about being that abrupt with The Taylor's.

"_Good you're both in position. Eyes downward Jason, remember?"_

" _Y-yes." _

"_Yes what?"_

"_Y-yes sir?"_

Christian immediately detested 'The Dominate' idea. What a horrific notion! Though it did make him almost crack a smile to imagine a strong viral ex-Marine like Jason reduced to a lowly obedient submissive. No! Never! Not anyone ever again. He was finished with that lifestyle for good.

He turned swiftly relieved in one manner to find his sanity intact. His body stiffened; dark gray eyes pooled with tears. They were the first tears he's felt like shedding in ages. "Jason, Gail. Is that really you?" he softly whispered.

"Yes indeed." Jason replied, "I hear you're looking for a bodyguard and a housekeeper. My wife and I would like to apply for the jobs if that'd be okay with you Mr. Grey. We're very reliable sir."

It's been some time since the sight of someone touched his heart. It mannered little to him now they had run out on him months ago, he was overjoyed they decided to return. The staunch businessman remained but his fierceness disappeared. Christian walked over, held his hand out to Jason. "Welcome back." He turned to address Gail and lost it. His arms wrapped tightly around her in a hug. "God I've missed you two."

Gail began to cry, "No Mr. Grey, not half as much as we have you. Leaving was the worst decision we've ever made. I do hope you forgive us."

"So Mr. Grey, may we have the jobs sir?" asked Jason."

It's been ages too since a smile, even the slightest crack replaced that stern seemingly chiseled frown. Today was certainly a triumph. "Only if you drive me to work today, Taylor and she fixes Mac and cheese for dinner."

"You got it boss! I'll get the car. The Audi SUV sir?"

"Yes, that will be perfect. Oh Taylor, it's good to have you back. You can't begin to imagine the imbeciles I've had to hire to replace you. And Gail, you can never be replaced as well. You have no idea the inept idiots I've ended up firing because they can't live up to your standards." He began to chuckle, a sound not heard out of him in a long time as well. "At least now I can eat a decent meal. My mother will be thrilled!"


	8. Chapter 8

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 8

Guilt Trip

**A/N: I know, I know, I'm very late with this update but it couldn't have been helped. Other important priorities got in the way. But here's the chapter now so enjoy (or not but I hope you do!) **

For the next thirty minutes it took to drive home Trudy rambled on and on about 'her mother this and her mother that' while Ana half listened and little Teddy rested in the car-seat between them. Sawyer tuned her out; kept his eyes on the road the whole time except for occasionally glancing up at the rear-view mirror always wary of the pain written on Ana's face not brought on by the sound of continuous babbling but of a problem far more difficult to have to endure. They've returned home and a grateful Trudy gets dropped off at her house first. The woman is so terribly thankful she'll probably bake Sawyer lemon bars tomorrow. He loves her homemade lemon bars. Ana quickly unbuckles a still napping little boy from his car seat. He doesn't stir not even as Sawyer carries him inside and into the child's bedroom setting him gently on top of the 'absolute most favorite' dinosaur bedspread.

Ana feels she's held back long enough; that the anguish kept bottled up inside finally needs its release. Her bedroom is a safe haven. She rushes inside, closes the door and let's loose. All the pent up frustrations, anxieties emotions come pouring out in her tears. She sits on the bed and weeps uncontrollably. This day, the unexpected meeting with Grace was far too stressful a coincidence. Ana cries and cries getting it out of her system. The well is empty and she rises goes to the kitchen pours herself a glass of orange juice then walks out on the deck to reflect her woes and find peace from watching the tide roll onto the shore though puffy eyes red from weeping and feeling the cool ocean breeze upon her tearstained cheeks. Sawyer sees a distraught Ana and comes out to join her, to keep her company. Or maybe it's to protect her from jumping off the edge?

"Luke, am I a good mother?" she asks, looking downward while twirling the glass in her hand. "Am I doing the right thing?"

He leans on the railing next to her. "You're a fantastic mother. Why?"

"I don't feel like it, not after today. Seeing Grace with Teddy how happy they were to see each other. Visiting with her in the coffee shop. I'm confused now. Part of me wants to give up, go back. Be weak like the old Ana would. But it's not that easy. I'm not ready to forgive Christian yet probably never will be." She stops and takes a drink of juice, "God if I weren't pregnant this would be vodka. That's how depressed I am."

"Blame it on the hormones then."

"I wish it were that simple. Luke, I don't know how to feel. I'm confused. I hate Christian and don't want a thing to do with him yet way deep inside I miss him. I don't want to hear anymore about the affair but then there's a tiny chip of my curiosity that wants to. I despise myself one moment then feel proud of my willpower the next. Right now I'm just a fucking mess of contradictions. Talk about a person who has to get her shit together!"

"I'm positive you will in time."

"You know what Grace told me today? She said Christian's turned 'dark' again. You're lucky you never had to witness him like that. That time before you were hired, before I came into his life."

"Don't worry," Luke chuckled, "I know all about it. The playroom, his subs. Taylor filled me in. In spite of the NDA he signed he thought I needed to know those facts first."

"I told her not to tell Christian she saw me, that I didn't want to be found. I wonder if she'll keep her promise."

"I think Grace will. She won't tell Christian but…" He turns to face her with a smirk, "That doesn't mean she can't tell someone else. And then they're free to tell Christian."

"Oh holy shit! I didn't think about that!" Ana puts her face in her hands and nods, "I am so screwed. Now it's just a matter of time before he finds me."

"What would you say to him if and when he does find you?"

"To leave and never bother looking for me again. I don't want to see his face or talk to him either. Just go away Mr. Control Freak, you're not welcome!"

"Ana, I understand why you don't want to see him but the two of you need to talk to each other and get the matter out in the open. I've seen for months now how it's tearing you apart. You're not as happy as you think you are."

Ana folds her arms against her chest in defensive denial, "What are you talking about Luke?" she shouts, "I'm very happy! Maybe not deliriously but I'm happy. I've just had a very emotional and stressful day. Fine 'Dr. Sawyer', go right ahead and blame my hormones for my indecisive and depressive state of being. I don't care. Now excuse me while I go and prepare dinner." She stalks into the house but suddenly halts wincing at a sudden flash of pain, the second one she's experienced today. The feeling lasts only a few seconds nothing she thought to cause great concern or be deemed a warning. She foolishly chooses to ignore it taking a deep breath instead and continues on with the business of dinner.

A matter that did cause her worry was the horrible way she lashed out at Sawyer. With remorse and sad blue puppy dog eyes she apologizes. He assures her that wasn't necessary for he understood and together they chuckle, "Blame it on the hormones."

After a filling dinner of homemade lasagna (homemade by Trudy but baked in Ana's oven), salad and garlic bread, she rinses and stacks the dishes in the dishwasher then takes her little man in for a bath, prepare him for bed and read to him a bedtime story of his choosing. "The end. Now give Mommy a kiss and go to sleep. I've already checked under the bed and so has Uncle Luke. No monsters of dinosaurs are hiding anywhere. Nightie, night my sweet Teddy bear."

Ana thinks she'll call it an early night too. Because of a day like this had been bursting with enough tension and anxiety to last a lifetime a nice hot soak in the tub is to her liking. "Ahh, that's more like it." She declares reveling in the soothing qualities of the mineral salts she added. "I needed this and so did you my precious baby girl. Don't worry, mommy's going to take real good care of you."

Feeling better now than she had all day Ana was ready to put it behind her. She climbs into bed, gets as comfortable as possible (for a woman who is almost six months pregnant can get), cuddles her head on her pillow hoping this night will be a restful one free from that ever menacing reoccurring 'Grey' nightmare.

…

Hearing the bell go 'ping' she stops cleaning the yellow carnations, looks up to greet the customer who just entered the shop. "Hello. Welcome to Le Petite Florale. I'm Anne, how may I help you?"

He turns away from the refrigerated display case to answer. She is struck down in awe of this man's Adonis like good looks. He is stunning; sheer perfection. Only one other man has ever affected her in the same way. Now there are two. "Yes, I'd like to get flowers to take to my aunt. She's in the hospital. What do you recommend?"

Ana almost doesn't answer being too entranced by his deep blue eyes, golden blond hair, perfect smile and tall, muscular physique and sensual voice. The first thought to race through her mind is _Why do men_ _this hot love to wear tight T shirts that accentuates a fantastically toned body just right and slim Levi's that makes a nice firm butt look might fine? _"Were you thinking anarrangement or a bouquet?"

One long slender finger scratches his chin. "I guess a bouquet. But I'm kind of at a lost at what flowers to pick out. What would you suggest? "

"Let's see, roses, lilies, gerbera daisies, tulips are nice 'get well' flowers."

"Those right there are pretty," he says pointing to the pink lilies. "I think Aunt Peta will like those."

The sound of his aunt's name makes Ana take special notice. "Peta? Like in Peta Nelson?" He nods to the positive. "So you're related to Trudy King?"

"Yes, we're cousins. How do you know Trudy?"

"She's my neighbor and good friend. Anne Steele's my name. And you?"

"Greg Christiansen. Nice to meet you." He courteously like any well-bred gentleman might do, holds his hand out for Ana to shake. The second their hands meet the same electrical current she felt five years ago in a certain someone's office she experiences with him.

Ana's taken aback; she can't quite comprehend what just took place. From the look on his face he felt it too. She begins to mull his name over in her mind, _Greg Christiansen, Christiansen Greg,_ _Christian Grey._ Hmm, what are the odds!

She comes back to her senses. "The lilies? I think your aunt will love them." Per his request she pulls the nicest looking dozen from the bunch. "Would you like me to arrange them in a vase for you?"

"No thanks, I'll just take them that way."

Ana proceeds to ready the lilies with greens and filler flowers, wraps them in colorful cellophane and ties on a big white bow. "Here you go. I know she'll love them. That'll be…"

Before she finishes he pulls out a black Centurion Amex card, one she's only seen one of before, her husband's. _Who is this man?_ "Thanks. I think so too."

Before he turns to leave, Ana come around from the counter, walks to the display case and pulls a small arrangement of mixed flowers out. "Here, could you please take this to your aunt from me?"

"Sure, no problem." He says unconcerned by the sight of her protruding belly. "On one condition. You and your husband come have lunch with me sometime." He flirts noticing the lack of a wedding ring on her finger.

She feels shy and demure. And giddy as a schoolgirl. "I'm not married. But I'd love to have lunch with you if you don't mind being seen with a fat cow like me."

"Of course not. Women are most beautiful when expecting. May I have your number so I can call and tell you when?"

She quickly grabs a business card from off the counter and scribbles down her number. "There you are." She replies handing to him all smiles.

He reaches for a card too and writes down his. "Here's my number. I'd give you one of my cards but I'm not carrying any with me. Well again, thanks. Bye now Anne. It's been a pleasure." _Who is this man?_

Ana's all giggly inside smiling as she can't help but stare adoringly as he walks out the door. Her smile quickly turns to a frown when she realizes how stupid she's been. _Oh shit! Trudy thinks Luke and I are married! How_ _will I explain this? _

This predicament bothered her for the rest of the workday on through dinner until she heard a frantic knock on the door. It was the way Trudy always knocked so it didn't take a genius to figure out who was pounding on the door. Ana answers relieved to see her friend hoping to clear this mess and ease her mind. She answers and lets inside a wide-eyed manic woman. "Anne, please don't let my cousin break up your marriage!"

Ana sighs and tells a white lie, "He can't Trudy because I'm not married. Luke is my brother."

Trudy's eyes beam, "Brother huh? If only I wasn't married."

"He's gay anyway."

"Oh." She pouts, "Seems like the cute ones always are. Or already married. But why the charade?"

They go sit down in the living room so Ana can explain her situation with twisted honesty. "Because I didn't know how you or Ali or anyone for that matter would react to me being a single mother. And then I find out I'm pregnant so Luke is pretending to be my husband. Sorry for the deception."

"That's okay." replies a now calm understanding neighbor. "I never thought poorly of you. So where's the father?"

"He's no longer in the picture. We were engaged but then I found out he was cheating on me so I gave him back the ring, took Teddy and left. As far as I'm concerned, the bastard's dead to me, his son and his unborn daughter."

"Oh my Lord! That's horrible! Then it is okay for my cousin to ask you out? Because I've never seen him so taken with a woman as much as he is you! To be honest, we all thought he was gay."

Ana sits with a wry smile on her face thinking how familiar the scenario sounded. _Good God, I hope he's not into BDSM too! _"He seems very nice. So how old is he? What does he do for a living?"

"He just turned the big '3-0'. Spent it in Jamaica or Bermuda or one of those other island places. You would never guess by looking at him that he's a big shot in the financial world would you? Co-CEO of his dad's banking firm and one of the trustees of the Christiansen-Abrams foundation. The guy's a super genius! And not so bad looking huh?" she winks and comically wipes her brow, "Whew! I feel better now knowing that he can't break up a marriage seeing as there wasn't one to begin with!" She rises up off the couch feeling like a gigantic weight has been lifted from her shoulders. "You must think I'm a fool for worrying the way I did. It's just that I know how charismatic Greg can be. Confidentially, yours wouldn't have been the first marriage he's broken up."

"Oh really?" The similarities between he and Christian were starting to add up. "Out of curiosity, does he enjoy sailing, flying, things like that? Does he play the piano?"

"You mean does he own a yacht and a plane? " Trudy smirks, "Yes. And prized race horses. You know, 'rich boys and their toys'. I know he loves surfing and cars. Doesn't play the piano very well but boy, put a violin or a guitar in his hands and pow! The sweetest music you've ever heard."

"Does he speak fluent French?"

"No. Spanish, Italian and a little Portuguese. Why?"

"Just wanted to know a little bit about him first incase he does want to get together. Uh, does he know his wines inside and out?"

"I wouldn't know." she shrugs "But he's very found of his cheeses."

"One last question. Did he go to Harvard?"

"No, he graduated Dartmount head of his class. I remember going to the graduation and being bored to tears." Trudy sighs and rises to leave. "Well, enough about Greg, I should be getting back to my family."

An overwhelmed Ana rises too. "Thanks for the info. I'm glad you told me. Sounds like a very interesting guy." She'd like to ask her friend about any fetishes he has or unusual lifestyles, but hasn't the guts.

"Ah, what are friends for?" Trudy says, heading out the front door." I'll see you Anne. Oh, does Luke like brownies? I'll bake him some."

"He'll eat anything." She decides to load up the praise. "Especially if it comes from you."

Trudy's wide beam could light up the darkest night. "Tomorrow then. Bye, bye now."

Ana closes the door and heads for the kitchen finally able to prepare dinner. She shakes her head in bewilderment. _Geez, wouldn't you know it. I've met_ _another Christian. How is that even possible? I must attract them like flies. Lord, I hope he's not a messed up control freak too!_

**Grace's POV**

Well what were the odds I'd be bumping into Ana? And of all places here at the hospital! I'm glad though, getting to visit with her, seeing Teddy and finding out I'm going to be a grandma again. But the hard part will be obeying her wishes and keeping it from Christian. But I do understand the reason why. Or do I? What he did to her, shattering the faith she had in him was an unforgivable act. I'll never understand why he did that either. So I don't blame her for wanting to keep her whereabouts a secret from my son, the overbearing, stalking, control freak. Ana trusts me so and I don't want to let her down. But still, Christian should know he's going to be a father again. But in his state of mind he'll be furious if I tell him and try harder to find her. I can just hear him now if he does. _"Damn it Ana, You better do as I say. That's my child too and I demand you get back to Seattle immediately. No ifs, ands, or buts. Do you hear me? Right now or there's going to be hell to pay. If you don't I'll charge you with kidnapping and…"_

Oh no! He'd never be that desperate. He loves her too much even though legally he might. I'm in such a quandary. Christian will never trust me again if I don't tell him and Ana will never trust me again if I do. I wish I had just stayed home now. Then I wouldn't have met her and been put in this position. But I did and I am so tell me Lord, what am I going to?


	9. Chapter 9

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 9

For what it's worth

**A/N: As always late, late, late with the updates! But here we go now…finally! Expect the unexpected! I hope you like it.**

For the next three days Grace agonizes heavily over Ana's statement, 'Don't tell Christian, I don't want to be found'. Her decision constantly wavers between respecting Ana's wishes or the fear of breaking her control freak of a son's heart even more. Her indecisiveness keeps her up at night; robs her of precious sleep. She needs some good advice and there was only one person she knows of whom she can seek council, one person she trusts to set her on the right path. And they'll be meeting today for lunch. Promptly at noon finds her sitting at a corner table at her favorite bistro quietly reading the menu and patiently waiting for her luncheon guest to arrive. She glances up to see he's walked through the door and on his way to join her.

"Hello Grace." greets the dapper looking British gentleman before her, "How nice it was of you to invite me to lunch. I must admit I've quite been looking forward to it."

"Thank you John. I'm so glad you could make it. Please, have a seat."

Dr. John Flynn nodded and obliged. Upon taking his seat he was quick to surmise from Grace's troubled expression there was more on her mind than just a friendly lunch. "So how are you doing? How's Carrick?"

"He's fine." she sighs, "We're both doing good, thank you."

He eyes her suspiciously not buying it for one bit. "Really? Because you look awfully burdened to me like you've the weight of a thousand men on your shoulders. And I can guess whatever it is involves Christian."

The good doctor's observation amuses her. "It seems a way of life lately."

A young blond haired waiter comes to take their order. He's a very personable fellow; reminds her a little of Elliott. She opts for an Asian salad and he the bistro's signature cream of broccoli and herb soup.

"John," Grace implores, "I, I need your advise. While I was in California last week on a medical tour I accidentally ran into Ana."

This tidbit of news piques his interest considerably. "Oh? Where was this?"

"San Luis Obispo. I was with a group touring the pediatric ward of French Hospital and we literally bumped into each other! Teddy and Sawyer were with her too so we did a little catching up. Teddy looks wonderful. Of course he misses Christian so I let him know that his father misses his 'Little Teddy Bear' just as much if not more. I can tell it pains Ana terribly to keep the two of them apart. Sawyer then took him for ice cream so Ana and I could have our own separate visit."

The waiter returns with their lunch. John's soup smells heavenly and Grace's salad looked too luscious for words. He readies himself for a spoonful. "May I be so bold as to ask what the two of you discussed?"

"Of course. We spoke of many things. How she and Teddy are doing, how they're dealing with the change and if they're happy. She says they are. Not once did she ask about Christian though. So I decided it best not to mention he'd had a complete breakdown. I did however tell her how much his personality has changed back to way he was before they met."

"What was her reaction? By the way, this soup is delicious."

"She didn't want to hear about it. Didn't care. Said there's nothing she can do to help him anyway. That she's not the same 'Ana' that she was back then."

"What do you suppose she meant?"

Grace nodded her head in doubt, "I don't know. I do know the 'Ana' she must have referred to trusted, cared and loved Christian with all her heart. But he foolishly destroyed her with his infidelity. That's why she's unable to forgive him and possibly never will. But I disagree with her on the point. "

"So you believe she still exist, hidden somewhere behind her pain, heartbreak and humiliation? That she might someday find a way to condone him for his peccancy?"

"Yes I do. The trust may be gone but she still loves and cares for the man deeply."

"You sound so sure about that Grace."

"I am! I know because of the look of worry in her eyes and on her face when I spoke about him. Here's my main problem though. She doesn't want Christian to know that I saw her so she's asked me not to tell him.

Flynn looks perplexed, "And why is that?"

"Simple. Ana's not stupid. She knows if Christian has any inkling where to look, he'll move heaven and earth to try and find her and the last thing she wants is to be found! But I haven't even told you the worst part. She's six months pregnant with his child and has made it perfectly clear she wants no contact with him whatsoever. So I ask you, John, what do you think I should do? Abide by Ana's wishes and say nothing, or go ahead and tell him. I'm aware that legally being the father he has a right to know about the child but I'll be risking breaking my son's heart even more than it already is if I do especially when he hears the part about her not wanting him to bother seeking her out because she never wants to speak to him again and hope for a reconciliation does not exist."

"You're correct in every aspect Grace, he does have a legal right to know. But at this particular time I can see where knowing would do Christian more harm than good. That would just drive him insane because of the simple fact he's not in control of the situation. And I will go out on a limb and tell you that the root behind this whole massive hornets nest stems from the lack of obtained control. Another thing, you may have seen Ana, Teddy and Sawyer in San Luis Obispo but there's no guarantee they even live in that city or anywhere in the vicinity. Why for all you know they could have been passing through as tourists. My advice to you Grace is to say nothing. But I'll leave that option to you."

She pondered Flynn's guidance carefully hence coming to a conclusion. "When you put it that way it sounds like sage advice." Being satisfied with the information she had desperately sought she felt somewhat relieved. Her spirit lifted and lunch for her and Flynn continued on a happier note.

"Well Grace," he said bringing napkin to mouth, "I thank you for a most delicious lunch."

"I thank you for the session. Because of you my mind is now at ease."

"Feel free to call me any time. After all, we both have Christian's best interests at heart."

…

**Two weeks later**

Saturday morning, and Christian sits at the kitchen counter eating his breakfast of an egg white omelet and orange juice all the while being consoled by Gail. "I know it's been three months since Ana and Teddy left but please don't give up hope, Mr. Grey. Jason and Mr. Welch are trying harder than ever now to find them and I just know there will be some good news soon."

"Thank you Gail. I hope so too. I've thought about it though, giving up that is. My life is useless without Ana and Teddy. They're the only good things I've ever had happened in my life aside from being adopted by the Grey's. I even put them through hell growing up. I didn't deserve them then and I honestly don't deserve them now. And I don't deserve Ana either because of my stupidity. But I want to try and make it better if I can. I have to and I need to. I need her back Gail. I need her love and her trust to survive. These past months have been pure hell for me. She made the nightmares go away. They've been back since she left and worse than ever. I wake up screaming. Even playing the piano anymore doesn't bring me solace. Gail, will you be honest with me? How badly was my marriage falling apart?"

"From what Jason and I witnessed it was pretty bad. The two of you would fight continually over of the stupidest of items. But worse, neither of you took the time to discuss things through with the other. Both of you would go to bed angry at nighttime and wake up just as angry in the morning. You'd leave for work without talking to each other. It was very evident she was in denial. Didn't want to face the fact that her marriage was in trouble. I tried to tell her but she wouldn't listen. And you, the one who always needs to be in control, wasn't. The more you tried to gain it back the worse things became. And in my opinion the affair for whatever the reason you decided you just had to have one was the final breaking point. Can the marriage be salvable? I hope it can if not for the two of you for Teddy. But we'll have to wait and see if it can won't we?"

Her fidelity hit him fairly in the chest. 'Your affair for whatever reason…'. The words bit into his fiber; his every muscle down to his core. He regretted the night he met Cassandra Zane. And how he's been lying to Flynn and to himself the nature of their alliance. Voices started screaming in his head. _How could you Grey? How could you let your dick rule your wisdom? For two months yet! You asshole you!_

_**But admit it. You loved fucking that young girl senseless didn't you? Made you feel wanted, virile, in control; Dominant again! A feeling Ana had been denying you for a long time. But you're still a fucking jackass! **_

_But at what cost now eh? Your marriage, that's what you dipshit! You deserve every ounce of shame and disgrace that's owed you._

"Mr. Grey, this just came for you."

The sound of Taylor's voice brought him back to the now. He took the manila envelope and paled at its contents. It was a sonogram and a note.

_Congratulations, Daddy _

_Love, Cassy _

…

Meanwhile, Ana's relationship with Greg has blossomed but no farther than very good friends. He's as protective of Ana as is Sawyer. They take Teddy for leisurely walks on the beach together tasting the salt air and listening to the gentle sound of the waves as they lap onto shore, out for ice cream or lunch on the Embarcadero at Morro Bay, even sailing on his sailboat and experiencing the excitement in Teddy's face as he caught his first fish. She's all smiles and contentment being by Greg's side. It's a different kind of warmth of companionship then she shares with Sawyer. She revels in the sheer enjoyment of this gorgeous man's company.

On a sunny Saturday while sitting on the green grass of the park with Trudy, Sawyer, Teddy and Greg watching Trudy's oldest play softball a sharp pain, sharper than any she's agonized but foolishly ignored in the past stabs her body with such severity she can't help but scream out in pain. "Someone call an ambulance!" This is all Ana hears before going into premature labor and slipping into darkness.

There is chaos and frenzied curiosity as the sirens blare and the ambulance appears. A paramedic tends to Ana, "We've got to get her to the hospital fast! The baby's in distress and she's unconscious if we don't there's a chance we may lose them both."

Trudy takes Teddy, Greg and Sawyer follow the ambulance to French Hospital. In a panic he calls a certain number he thought should know of the drastic circumstances. "Hello. I need to talk to a Dr. Trevelyn-Grey. It's an emergency of the highest degree. Tell her Sawyer's on the phone!"

**AA/N: So, is it really Christian's baby? Will there eventually be a hot romance between Ana and Greg? Or will Ana and/or the baby even survive? Tell me what you think!**


	10. Chapter 10

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 10

Life or Death

**A/N: I couldn't leave you hanging for long so here's the next chapter. Again, expect the unexpected. **

In a large corridor near the second floor Nurses station of busy Harborview Hospital stands a small group of doctors discussing the status of one their patients. A young nurses-aide dressed in pale pink scrubs comes running toward them, "Excuse me, Dr. Trevelyn-Grey, there's a phone call for you. It's a Mr. Sawyer. He says it's an emergency."

Grace's eyes grow wide. She doesn't even excuse herself just rushes over to the station, takes the phone from the hand of the other aide sitting behind it. "Sawyer, what's wrong?"

"It's Ana! She's gone into premature labor. They're rushing her to French Hospital now. The baby's in distress and she's unconscious. It's serious, Grace. She might die! How soon do you think you can be here?"

As a woman who retains her cool amid the most adverse conditions Grace's lower lip begins to quiver for despite all the misery bestowed the family she loves Ana with all her heart. "I'm on my way now. And I'm bringing Christian with me!"

Sawyer nods his head in agreement, "I think under these circumstances it's a good idea."

A lump forms in Grace's throat as she hangs up the phone. Out of the pocket of her white doctors coat and pulls out her Blackberry. Suppressing back tears that have formed in her eyes she quickly dials Taylor.

Within seconds she hears his sturdy voice, "Taylor here."

"Hello, Taylor this is Grace. How soon can you get the plane ready? I need to use it immediately."

"Sure Grace, where to? Why? What's the matter?"

"To San Luis Obispo. It's a dire emergency! And tell Christian he's coming with me. I'll explain everything on the way."

Taylor hangs up and wastes no time calling to ready the plane. He hurries toward Christian's office with the speed of a Daytona 500 racecar to find his boss sitting behind his desk working on the computer. In as calm a voice as possible he relates the news. "Mr. Grey Your mother called requesting the plane. Says it's an emergency. Flying into San Luis Obispo. And she insists you come with her. She'll give you details on the way. I've already called Olsen. It'll be ready for us to leave in fifteen minutes."

Christian's eyes widen in confusion. What's happened that needs his attention? And why out of state? His queries will have to wait to be answered until he sees his mother. He's totally dazed; rises out of his big comfy leather chair, walks in a fast pace to his bedroom and packs a small carry-on bag. Ten minutes later he and Taylor head for the airport.

Upon boarding his company's plane he is perplexed even further to not only find Grace sitting patiently waiting for his arrival but Dr. Greene as well. "Hello Christian, hello Taylor," she greets, "Please have a seat and I'll explain everything. And don't you dare get angry or upset!" The plane roars off and she continues. "Two weeks ago I and a group of doctors were visiting a hospital in San Luis Obispo. While there I bumped into quite accidentally, Ana."

The mere mention of her name makes his breath hitch; his heart beat faster. He sits up in his seat nervously rubbing his knuckles ready to listen to his mother more intently than before.

"We had quite a lovely visit. By the way, Teddy told me to tell you hello and he misses you." Tears begin to well in his eyes. " We're going to San Luis Obispo because she is six months pregnant with your child. She didn't know it when she left and has now gone into premature labor. I just thought you as the father would like to be there!" He is agape by the news and begins to talk but Grace holds her hand up first. "Shut up! Don't you dare say a word! The reason she hasn't mention the pregnancy… is because she doesn't want any communication with you or the family. In short Christian, she never wants to speak to you again all due to your asinine error in judgment! Now, sit back in your chair, quietly vent your anger and hostility with me and with Ana out of your system and try to relax. If you feel the urge to say something then do it without growling! Because, you know my dear son, you started it all. Face it. It's-all- your- fault! You are fifty shades at fault!"

Christian cowers at his mother's reprimand because he knows it's all the truth. He was caught with his dick stuck inside the 'Infidelity cookie jar' and now he's paying the price! He sits back carefully pondering the situation that lay ahead. _What will I say to her when I see her? If I get to see her that is,_ s_eeing as she doesn't want to talk to me because to her I do not exist any longer! But seeing as I am the baby's father maybe she'll change her mind. And if she does how do I go about winning her back because more than anything I want to make things right again. I want my family back! Ana, Teddy, me and, and…is the baby a boy or a girl? Whatever, the new little addition! Yeah! But what if she and the baby don't survive. What will I do then? Stay strong for Teddy you idiot! Stop thinking of yourself! Don't you realize yet that's what got you into this mess in the first place… you moron!_

Soon enough the plane lands at the nearby airport and due to Taylor's keen insight a rental car is waiting to whisk them to their destination.

Meanwhile…

…

**At the hospital**

A rush starts to take place as the ambulance with its lights flashing and siren blaring swiftly pulls in front of the hospital. Hurried Medical personal starts to clamor around and the jargon flows freely similar to that of a T.V medical program: "What have we here?" "An unconscious white female six months pregnant and going into labor." "Get her inside stat!"

Within seconds Sawyer and Greg pull up in Greg's sleek white Quattroporte Maserati to observe Ana being placed on a gurney. They catch up and follow as she's being wheeled inside. Sawyer knows that in an incident this serious there is no room to lie so when asks by the intern for pertinent information needed instead of obeying Ana's wishes to keep her anonymity safe he opts in telling the truth. "Her name is Anastasia Grey, 27, married, one child, husband's name is Christian Grey."

"Christian Grey, the billionaire?" she asks looking up from her clipboard.

Realizing full well that Ana will kill him for betraying her confidence he sighs and nods his head in affirmation. "Where are they taking her?"

"To the ICU. She'll need to be monitored and attended to. I'm afraid the two of you will have to wait over there until the doctor comes with news of her progress."

As requested Sawyer and Greg resigned to the area designated. They sat, Sawyer in a chair, Greg on the comfortable couch to wait nervously for any news on Ana. Sawyer picked up one of the magazines from the table to use as a distraction. Greg started to do the same. "So she Christian Grey's wife huh? What's with Ann Steele then?"

"Yes and it's a long story, one I'd rather not discuss."

"Are you her brother?"

Sawyer is becoming perturbed by the small talk but looks up from his reading to answer his question. "No. I'm really her bodyguard."

Five minutes later a doctor come over with news on Ana. "She's still unconscious but we have to take her in for an emergency C section. I'll let you know right now because of her condition it's a 50/50 chance one or both may not survive."

Sawyer is petrified with fear. With trembling fingers he picks up his phone and calls Grace to let her know.

She answers immediately aware the only person calling would be him. She chose her words carefully not to bring alarm to the others. "Yes?"

"Hi Grace, it's Sawyer. Just so you know they just took Ana in to surgery for an emergency C section. The doctors need to do it now or there's a chance that she or the baby or both may not survive."

Sawyer's words hit her hard. It was the second worse information possible she wanted to hear. The first of course…Grace refused to think about. She swallowed hard and remained stoic for the others. "I see. Thank you. We'll be there as soon as we can. Yes. Don't worry, I'll tell the others. He knows." Grace puts the phone down and gazes at the three faces anxious to hear what she dreads to tell them. "I want you to prepare yourselves first. What I'm about to tell isn't good. The doctors have taken Ana into surgery. They needed to take her in for an emergency C section." She took a hold of Christian's hand; his eyes welled with tears. "Christian, Ana might die. Or the baby or both."

Both Taylor and Dr. Greene gasps astonish. Christian could no longer contain his tears. The floodgates opened and they ran freely down his cheeks. His hand grips tightly onto his mother's. The thought of losing Ana again is too much for him to bare. "She can't Mom, she can't."

Grace pulls him close; puts her arms around him; comforts him as only a mother's love can do. "I know it baby, I know."

Meanwhile…

…

**Back at the hospital**

Ana gets prepped for the surgery; hooked up to monitors and the like. The surgeon is ready with scalpel in hand. "Ready Dr. Allen?" asks the surgical nurse. He replies with a nod of his head and begins to cut.

He lifts the tiny fragile baby from Ana's womb. "Put her immediately in an incubator." he orders, handing the child quickly to a nurse. He turns back to close her up.

"Doctor, she's bleeding!" "Her blood pressures falling!" "Her pulse is weakening!" "Quick Doctor, we have to stop the bleeding!" "Hurry, blood pressures falling faster!" "Her pulse…we're loosing her doctor, hurry!"

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep…

Flat line.

**AA/N: Now before I get all you bleeding hearts out there angry at me "Why'd you kill Ana!" please think again! **


	11. Chapter 11

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 11

Death or life

**A/N: This is a short chapter but I couldn't keep you in suspense forever. I hope you like it. **

The planes light landing change the somber mood of its passengers. When come to a complete stop the anxious four quickly depart and in as fast as a nanosecond climb into the waiting black rental car. Taylor, who has been studying the best and fastest route to take over to the hospital gets behind the wheel, Dr. Greene in the passenger side and Grace and her distraught son in the back. The ten-minute drive feels like forever to him. Why, to his prediction a snail has a better chance of arrival than they did.

Once at their destination and safely parked they bound out the car with the speed out light. A frazzled out-of-control Christian has to be reigned by his more composed mother. "I'm telling you Christian calm down! Before you walk through those doors you get a hold of yourself first! Your anxiety isn't helping one bit."

They rush toward the glass doors. Despite Grace's demand Christian bursts in with a fury. "Where's my wife?"

Grace rolls her eyes as if why did I even bother! It's Taylor's turn now to quell his boss's angst while a placid Grace along with Dr. Greene walk over to the front desk to check on Ana's status. " Hello, I'm Dr. Trevelyn-Grey and I'd like to inquire about a Mrs. Anastasia Grey please?"

"She's in surgery right now. Please, have a seat and the doctor should be with you soon."

…

**Ana**

Whoa, where am I? Who are all these people? They're in such a panic and look so stressed out. Ugh! Too depressing. I'm out of here! Hmm, I'll take a walk down this hall, maybe figure out where I am. By the look of some of the people who are wearing scrubs I'd say it's a hospital. But what am I doing in a hospital?

"_Because you went into premature labor, Ana."_

Huh? Who is this strange woman walking with me? _"Where did you come_ _from? Who are you? How do you know my name?"_

" _My name is Elle. I know everything about you." _

"_Oh my God, you're Christian's mother!"_

"_I know everything about you too"_

Who is this soldier walking next to me now? _"Uh, have we met?"_

"_No, we never got the chance to. I'm Frank Lambert. I'm your father."_

Hold on a minute. Both these people are dead. Does that mean that I'm…

"_Yes it does. But you don't have to be. You can still go back. You really should you know. My son misses you terribly._

"_I miss him too. But how can I ever forgive him?" _

"_Yeah, that was pretty shitty of him to do. Just goes to show how weak a man he really is. And that's my fault. I made him weak. I brought despair into his life. I can't thank Grace and Carrack enough for making my sweet Christian part of their family…and saving him. You saved him too, Ana. _

_Look at him over there. I've never seen a more miserable man in my life."_

Wait. What is Christian doing here? And Grace and Taylor and Dr Greene?

"_Because he really loves and cares about you with all his heart. You mean everything to him or else he wouldn't be here."_

"_But how can I ever trust him again? What guarantee do I have that he won't go and do that again? Tire of me, find someone else like, like that slut Cassandra Zane?"_

"_People learn from their mistakes, Ana. Christian has. He realizes that was the worst mistake he's ever made by breaking your heart. He's doesn't blame you either for running away and taking Teddy with you. But he wants you both back. He wants to try and make things right again."_

"_I don't think he can Elle."_

"_He will. It won't be immediate. There will be bumps along the way but he'll eventually make things the way they were before. Your marriage will be strong again. And Christian does not love Cassandra Zane. In fact he despises the woman now. Regrets the night he even came in contact with her. And you're right. She is a slut. A manipulative bitch!"_

"_Hey, he wasn't all to blame for your marriage falling apart. You had a part in it too."_

"_Me? What's that's suppose to mean Dad?"_

"_Your feistiness, I love it! You get that from your mother. What I mean, Ana is you have to learn to communicate with each other. Don't just yell and scream, talk your problems out rationally. And young lady, quit being in denial all the time! There was a real problem with your marriage. People like Gail and Kate, they tried to tell you so but you refused to listen to what they had to say."_

"_Go back, Ana, please go back. If not for Christian's sake then do it for Teddy and Phoebie." _

"_Phoebie? Who's Phoebie?"_

"_She's that precious little girl fighting for her life over in the nursery. You just gave birth to her and she's going to need love of a mommy and a daddy now more than ever." _

"_And go back for Carla and Ray. I'm so glad she found him. He raised you up right. Not to mention Grace, Carrack, Kate, all of them that love you and would be devastated by your death. Please we beg of you, go back now!"_

"_Okay, I will!"_

Beep…..beep…beep….beep….beep…beep..beep…

"Doctor, we've got a heartbeat again." "And her blood pressure's rising" "Her pulse, it's weak but there is one." "And she's breathing again too."

"It's a miracle. She's alive!"


	12. Chapter 12

Fifty shades at Fault

Chapter 12

…to those who wait.

**A/N: I know, I know later than I expected to post but here you go. I want to thank those of you who left suggestions for the story. They sound good! I'm thinking of using a few. Awesome! **

"She's in surgery right now. Please, have a seat and a doctor should be with you soon."

Grace nodded and thanked the young girl for this small tad of information. Granted it may not have been much but enough to allot her distraught son a bit of much needed hope and ease of mind. He was sorely in need of them for the more he frantically paced back and forth raking his long slender fingers through his shaggy copper hair the more he feared the thought of a sad inevitable. She walked up behind and gently tapped him on the shoulder, "Christian," He jumped at the sound of his name and turned quickly to face his mother praying she'd be able to pass him a few words of comfort. "Ana is in surgery right now. They won't know more for a while yet so I advise that you and Jason go sit and wait until a doctor comes out with more word on her condition. Carol and I are going to walk around and see if there's anything we can find out."

"I'm going with you!" cries a panicked Christian.

Grace looks straight into his worried gray eyes and puts one hand on his unshaven face, "I say it's better if you wait here darling. You're too upset and on edge. You need to calm down first or you'll be no good to anyone, least of all, Ana. Jason, please take him over to the waiting area where Luke and that other gentleman are sitting and you two do the same!" She motions for Dr. Greene to join her and they disappear down a wide hospital corridor.

Taylor respected her wishes and without haste led his reluctant boss over to the one spot in the lobby whose soul purpose was for nervous angst-ridden people like Christian, to sit and visit with others feeling just the same whilst playing the all-mighty waiting game. He nodded at Luke in recognition and gave him a sly smirk which was quickly returned in what was probably acknowledgment of some ongoing 'Grey' joke between the two of them.

Christian finds it far too difficult to relax. He fidgets in his seat, taps his foot non-stop and drums his fingers on the arm of the straight-back chair. Out of appreciation for watching over Ana and Teddy these past tumultuous months he gives Sawyer a deserving smile. But gives Greg an evil eye. _Who is this fucker?_ _What the fuck is he doing here? How the fuck does he know Ana? He better not be fucking her or he'll be fucking dead!_

Sawyer feels the time is now to intercede with needed introductions. "Uh, Greg, this is Christian Grey, Ana's husband. Mr. Grey this is Greg…"

"Gregson Christiansen, the billionaire _playboy_ right?" Christian snidely replies, putting the emphasis on playboy.

Greg chuckles and with cool sophistication answers, "Funny how the media likes to label a person, huh? Yes, I'm wealthy but no, I'm not a playboy. And if I'm not mistaken you've dealt with the same problem yourself aka trying to live down a false rumor."

With a smoldering ire, Christian utters, "Touche."

Sawyer clears his throat deciding that an explanation regarding Greg and Ana's innocent relationship is definitely in need if the green in Christian's eyes are to revert back to their normal shade of gray. "Ahem, Greg here is Ana's best friend, Trudy King's cousin. We were all at the park together when she went into labor. Trudy took Teddy with her and we followed the ambulance here to the hospital."

Christian's expression softens, "Thank you." he mutters to Greg.

He accepts the offering with a quick nod and goes back to flipping through an old issue of Time magazine.

Christian turns to face Taylor, "God I wonder where my mother is."

…

**Grace and Carol**

The two good doctors escape down the long hospital corridor, their heels making a clicking sound as they walk. "I've never seen Christian so on edge before." Dr. Greene confides, "Not even when his son was being born."

"Yes I know. It's because of Ana. He's always worried about her safety but even more now since he hasn't seen her for four months"

"Tell me honestly, Grace, do you see any hope that their relationship can be salvaged? Not that it's any of my business but you know what they say about curiosity."

Grace breaths a sigh, "That depends solely on Ana. I do hope so though. I hope she can find it in her heart to forgive him." She inquires on the surgical schedule and is informed of the surgeon performing Ana's C-section: Dr. Kenneth Allen. The name sounds familiar to her. Of course, now it comes back to her. He was one of the doctors she had met two weeks ago. Out of the corner of her eye Grace notices a rather weary pair of dark green scrubs rounding a corner on the right. She couldn't be more delighted that the doctor wearing the scrubs is Dr. Allen. "Hello, Dr. Allen. I'm Dr. Grace Trevelyn and this is Dr. Carol Greene. You may not remember me I was a member of the tour that took place here two weeks ago. I see that you were assigned my daughter-in-law Anastasia Grey's surgery. I just wanted to ask how it turned out and how Ana fared?"

"I do remember you Dr. Trevelyn." Exclaimed the tall, silver haired man. "How have you been? I had no idea you were related to Mrs. Grey."

"Yes, she's married to my son, Christian Grey. So about the surgery."

"What a coincidence. I was just about to inform the family but I'm glad I ran into you first. You're not going to believe what I'm about to tell you. You see, Ana die on the table…"

Poor Grace gasped from horror and almost fainted onto the floor if not for Dr. Greene having a tight grasp of her arm. "Oh my poor Christian and Teddy!"

"Wait, wait! You didn't let me finish! Like I said, she died on the table and just as we were about to call 'time of death' is when we get a heartbeat."

"So, so she _is_ alive?" asks a stunned paled Grace.

"Yes, yes indeed. They just took her back to ICU."

"And the baby?"

"Very tiny. She's been put in an incubator and moved to the nursery for observation. There is a problem however. It concerns her breathing. Right now it's very shallow. They're checking but we think it might have to do with the fact her lungs aren't as fully developed as they should be yet."

"I see. You don't mind if Dr. Greene and I take a peek at her do you?"

"Of course not! Please, go right ahead. I'll just go and inform the other family members about Mrs. Grey."

"Oh, uh about that. If you could by chance do me a favor and not mention the part about her dieing on the table. I don't think my son could handle knowing that part right now."

Dr. Allen understands and nods in agreement, "You're right. That would sound better coming from your mother. Thanks for the heads up." He turns but a thought comes to his mind first, "Oh, and the baby? I'm sure he'll ask. Anything you don't want me to tell him?"

Grace thinks for a bit on what Christian's reaction might be, "No, I think it would be okay to tell him everything. She's his child, he needs to know." Not envious one bit of the doctor's next task, she and Dr. Greene head toward the nursery to check on her newest grandchild.

Leaving Dr. Allen the duty of finding a neurotic Christian on his own.

…

**Neurotic Christian and the others**

Whilst Taylor tries his best to keep Christian from having a panic attack Sawyer decides to make himself useful. "Thanks for the coffee Luke." Greg says upon being handed a piping hot plastic cupful.

Christian, who a this point is about as calm as a caged bull, manages a small smile of gratitude when handed his cup which pleases Sawyer since that's more than he expected to receive.

Taylor nods his appreciation and is quick to notice a tired figure in green medical garb walking toward their anxious group. "I think that's the doctor now, boss."

Christian's eyes grow wide; his anxiety jumps. He rises in a frenzy,…

Dr. Allen saunters over to meet them with an outstretched hand, "Hello, I'm Dr. All…"

…and before the introduction is complete he lunges and frantically yells, "How's my wife?!"

A taken-aback doctor calmly replies, "You must be Mr. Grey." Thankful for being warned ahead of Christian's obvious delicate state of mind he continues to answer the query. "She's fine. They've taken her to ICU…"

"When can I see her?!"

"Oh, not for a while yet. She needs rest and monitoring. I suggest waiting until tomorrow."

Christian tenses, his eyes narrow; "I demand to see her now!" he growls."

"I'm sorry Mr. Grey I can't let you, not yet. Wouldn't you like to know about your daughter though?"

A goofy grin appears on the new father's face and his disposition mellows. "Yes, of course, my baby. Where is she? How is she? Can I see her?"

"She's over in the nursery and being that she premature we naturally had to put her in an incubator. The staff was quick to notice a difficulty in her breathing largely due to the underdevelopment of her lungs. Yes, by all means go see her. Your mother and Dr. Greene are there right now. You're welcome to join them if you wish. I'll even take you there myself. Follow me." Dr Allen pats the over-the-moon poppa on the shoulder and leads him to visit the newest addition to the Grey family.

Jason scratches his head and lets out a deep breath, "Is that poor sap wound tighter than two thousand drums or what! He's been like that for hours now. Ever since Grace told him about Ana."

"Well he wouldn't be so wound up if I hadn't called Grace! I panicked! Though I knew she was back in Seattle, I called her anyway. I felt one of the Grey's should know that Ana might be dieing and who better than the one who already knew of Ana's condition. But now, and she's tried so hard to keep her anonymity." Luke holds his head in his hands and moans, "When Ana finds out she's going to kill me!"

**Ana in ICU**

It's dark, quiet. So quiet. Swirling. Darkness. Light, I see light. Reach the light. Craggy mountainside, climb. Hard, hurting. Fingers bleeding. Arms sore. Clawing. Must climb. Almost to top. Reach ledge. Slippery. Can't hold. Have to, Please! Help, I need help. Take hand. Pull. No! No! Don't let me… No! I, I can't! I'm…AWwwww….falling, dark. Swirling, deeper, down, darker…dark… dark….noooooo….

_**Happy Thanksgiving everybody! **_


	13. Chapter 13

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 13

Emotions anyone?

**A/N: Here you go- chapter 13. I hope you like it.**

His lower lip quivers, his eyes pool. A teardrop slowly runs down his cheek. Christian stands silent staring in awe of the little infant fighting for life in her crib of glass and tubing. This was his child lying there; his little baby girl and he couldn't even hold her in his arms. Grace puts a comforting hand on her son's shoulder, "She's beautiful isn't she?" she asks, in admiration of her newest grandchild.

Christian is too overcome for words. A simple nod of the head has to suffice as a reply.

"Carol is in with her now checking her vitals. Christian, right now her lungs are very weak. I know it's too soon to tell but, there's only a 50/50 percent chance she'll survive."

He is awash with fear and guilt. _It's your fault she's there you fucker! It's_ _because of the stress and anxiety you brought onto Ana! You've only ever caused her nothing but grief and heartbreak. The same goes for everyone else in your life too starting with your birth mother. If you hadn't been born she wouldn't have turned into a crack whore. And Grace and Carrick. Look at all the shit they've had to put up with from you through the years. God, you were more trouble to them than you were worth! How could they have loved you? How could any of them have loved you! You've never deserved any of it and you never will. Because of you and your fuckedupness that innocent child may not live. You're a disgrace Grey, a fucking disaster! And that's all you ever will be isn't it! To anyone! Even yourself!_

Christian's emotions can no longer be contained. He buries his head into his mother's hair and the waterworks flow. "Because of me. It's my penance."

"Please dear, you mustn't go blaming yourself more than you already have. That's not going to help you or the situation any. Besides, this type of condition happens quite often in premature babies. Look, I don't see where there's anything you can do for her right now but there's something you can do for yourself. Get. Some. Rest! Take care of those bags under your eyes and let the doctors and nurses take care of that precious little gift. Better yet, go spend time with Teddy. He needs you now more than ever."

"Sir," announces Taylor, "Sawyer's gone to get him now. I thought it best the two of you meet at the plane other than the hospital. Then take it from there."

"Thank you." whispers a mentally exhausted Christian. "You'll call me if there's any change won't you Mother? With Ana too?"

"Of course. Now go to my grandson. Shower him with love and kisses. Make up for lost time. Can you do that?"

He sighs and gives her a peck on the cheek, "You know it!" She smiles back at her son and a silent "Go" escapes her lips. His tense body begins to relax; he turns and heads off behind Taylor, looking forward to do what he's yearned for all these past months: send quality time with his son.

…

Ten minutes later Sawyer and Greg return to the 'scene of the crime', the park in Morro Bay to retrieve Sawyer's patiently waiting SUV. He quickly jumps out of Greg's Maserati, "Hey, thanks for all your help today, Greg," he says gratefully holding one hand up to shade his eyes from the bright late afternoon summer sun. "You don't know how much it was appreciated."

"Hey, anytime. I'm glad I was there to offer some. Here's praying that Ana and her daughter will be okay."

"I'm sure that she will be. I know Ana and she's not about to give up without a fight."

"I've gotten that opinion about her." Greg chuckles. "I suppose it's no secret to you Luke just how fond I am of Ana. And of Teddy too."

"No it certainly is not. And I'm glad too because I know for a fact they're quite fond of you. Speaking of the little guy I better hurry and get him. Are you going to the hospital tomorrow?"

"Yes, I'm planning on it. Although Grey might have a fit if he saw me again. That man does not like me!"

"That's because you pose a threat. He's jealous of any man who has the unmitigated gall to show Ana the slightest bit of attention. Who knows, he's probably jealous of the doctors and me now too."

"Hmm. The man sounds a tad insecure about their relationship. Is that why she left him?"

Luke's eyes grow wide at Greg's inquiry. _How did he know?_ "Excuse me?"

"Hey, I'm not trying to pry but all the signs are there. First, she's not wearing a wedding ring. Second, she changed her name. Anastasia Grey to Anne Steele? Probably didn't want him to find her. Third, she took their son with her. Boy he must have done something despicable to make her leave. What happened? Did he cheat on her?"

"Look I really feel uncomfortable talking about it and besides, I have to go pick up Teddy. I'll see you later, tomorrow at the hospital. Bye and thanks."

Luke turns toward his car as Greg darts off like a flash. _Oh good Lord he_ _knows! But you didn't tell him so it's okay. Maybe this is a good thing though. Having competition around might spurn Mr. Grey on to try even harder to win Ana back. Or…it could prove a fucking disaster!_

…

**Teddy**

"How's Anne? Is she okay?"

"She'll be fine Trudy. Resting in ICU. I'll fill you on the details tomorrow. But right now…where's that Teddy boy?"

"I'm right here Unca Luke!" says the spry little four year old bounding out of another room.

"Hey, there's my big T-Bear! Time to come with me now. Say goodbye."

Teddy gives Trudy a big goodbye hug and a tiny peck on the cheek. "Bye Auntie Twrudy." Luke takes hold of the boy's small hand and heads for the SUV. Naturally a thousand questions needing a thousand answers start popping out of the little tikes head. "Where's Mama? Is she okay?"

"Your Mama is going to be just fine." Luke grunts as he picks Teddy up to put him in his booster chair. "She had an accident and we had to take her to the hospital but she's okay now. She just has to stay there for a few days. So it's you and me kid. But I've got a surprise for you."

"Really?" His face lights up with glee. "I luv surprises! What is it?"

Luke chuckles as he slides in behind the steering wheel. "If I told you what it was it wouldn't be a surprise! I will give you a clue though. I'm taking you to the airport."

Teddy ponders the clue and for the entire time (less than half an hour but still poor Luke!) his questions flow like water. They finally arrive to the airport and Teddy cannot contain his rapture when setting sight of the big white GEH jet and the casually dressed man standing, waiting in front of the steps for him. Luke quickly unbuckles him; he jumps down and scurries off with his arms open wide screaming "DDDAAADDDIIIEEE!"

Christian's strong arms scoops his son right up and he hugs him with all his might. "Oh my Teddy Bear, have I missed you!"

Teddy's arms wrap around his father's neck; his head full of copper colored hair rests on top of Christian's wide shoulder. "I've missed you too, Daddy."

Tears start to flow and the reunion begins.

…

**Ana**

_Amid a tomb of darkness I hear a door squeak open. I walk toward the sound and see a stairway. My curiosity won't be quelled. My desire to discover it's wear-about is too strong. So marks the ascent._

…

**The next day**

**Sawyer**

The cool, crisp, feel of the ocean breeze. The sound of waves as they gently crash to the shore. The slight tangy taste of salty air. Sawyer's senses come alive as he stands outside on his balcony looking out on God and Mother Nature's beauty, sipping his morning coffee and contemplating the start of his day. Yesterday he shared this magnificence with Ana. Today he shares it alone; by himself like he had years ago before he moved to Seattle.

"_Son, why are you leaving?"_

"_Because Ma, I'm sick and tired of living off this family. I want to depend on myself, and hard work to get by in this world not the Bernard T. Sawyer Family Trust. I'm not content to just selfishly sit back month after month with all the money I'd ever need right at my fingertips. I want the satisfaction of being able to say 'hey I actually did something to earn it'. Sorry, but being a trust fund baby and the son and grandson of billionaires isn't all it cracked up to be."_

"_Don't be ridiculous Lucas, it's owed you. Why, your grandfather worked very hard…"_

"_See, see he made the money, not me! I'm just standing around doing nothing but reaping in the benefits. That maybe fine for Sheila and Perry but not me."_

"_You sound ashamed of your family. Are you?"_

"_No, I'm not Ma. I'm sorry if I gave you that impression. It just… I want more out of life. I guess I'm not thrilled with the ostentatious lifestyle of being wealthy. _

"_And what are you planning to do to as far as a job goes?"_

"_I don't know yet. But I'm smart, resourceful. I'm sure I'll find something without monetary help from the family name."_

"_Okay but where are you planning on going?"_

"_I don't know that either. Maybe… Canada!"_

"_Wait! You're not following that horrible trollop are you?"_

"_Hey, don't you dare talk about Deidra like that! So what if the Walkers aren't snobby rich. They're good, descent people and so is she. We loved each other! Really loved each other. And we'd be married now if it weren't for you and your meddling! And no, she wasn't pregnant! She wouldn't have stooped that low. Deidra loved me for me, not my money."_

"_Well I see it's useless to try and persuade you to stay. You're so stubborn just like your father. That's one of his qualities I adore. And I adore you too. I love you sweetheart and will miss you terribly. Please keep in touch will you? Oh, your money will always be at your disposal in case you need it."_

The buzzing sound of his phone brings Sawyer out of his reminiscence. It's Taylor on the other end reminding him that he's to pick up Teddy and he'll be ready for him when he gets there. Sawyer rushes himself to get ready. Less than half an hour later, all showered, shaven and freshly dressed he heads out toward San Luis Obispo in the SUV.

Sawyer's day has officially begun.

…

Grace and Carol are the first to arrive at the hospital so of course they're the first to visit with Ana whom has now been moved to a private hospital room. She lays peaceful in the bed. Serene, in a state of unconsciousness hooked up to this contraption and that contraption.

"How is Ana doing today Dr. Allen?" asks Grace to the doctor in charge. "Has there been any change?"

"Yes, her vital organs are better," he answers glancing up from her chart, "All seem to be in working order. Heartbeat and blood pressure remain normal for now. She just needs to rest, that's all. I can't tell you when she'll regain consciousness. Could be hours or days but that's up to her."

"Thank you Doctor." Grace goes over by the side of Ana's bed and brushes a few strands of hair from her face. "If you can hear me Ana, please wake up. We all miss you terribly. And you've yet to see your daughter. She's beautiful, so precious. She needs you very much we all do. Especially Teddy and Christian." Grace leans down to plant a gentle kiss on Ana's forehead. "I'll leave you to rest now my dear."

**Ana**

_It feels as if I've been climbing these steps forever. I need to rest. Good. There's a platform and an open door. There are people in the distance just standing around. I must go see why. Who are they? And why are they all dressed in black? I must get closer. This black tunnel seems like it goes on forever though. Wait, wait I can see them better now. Oh my God! It's Christian and little Teddy Bear and all the Grey's. There's my mother and father, Kate, Ethan, all the Kavanaghs. There's Jason, Gail, Luke and Jose! They're all crying too but why? Now they're leaving. Stop! Stop! Wait for me! I'm almost there. Darn, I'm finally here and they aren't. Let's see what all the crying was about. Oh my God! There are two tombstones one big one and one small._

_The larger one- _**Anastasia Rose Grey**_. The smaller one- _**Baby Girl Grey.**

_What? No, no! It can't be! I don't believe it. I refuse to believe that the baby and I are dead. Because we aren't! I need to go back to the darkness where it's safe. I need to get back to the stairs and start climbing again! I need to get back to my family, to Teddy…to Christian!_

**A/N 2: I don't want you guys to worry Ana and Christian will reunite soon. It just takes awhile to get there. Hope you stick around until then. I want to thank you all for your kind reviews. They're awesome! **


	14. Chapter 14

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 14

Two days of awakening

**A/N: Here you go, late as always, the next chapter. I hope you like it. **

The hospital is alive with activity this morning. Some of them are even patients, their loved ones, doctors and nurses. Lets just say news regarding billionaires and their wives travel fast. It's only 8:47am and already there's a floral delivery at the front desk. "These are for a Mrs. Anastasia Grey."

"Leave them right here and we'll make sure she receives them."

The young deliverer tries to argue with the stern receptionist but in the end reluctantly concedes. _Well duh, what did the idiot expect? _

Grace, who had arrived earlier with Dr. Greene and just been to check on Ana who was recently moved to a private room in ICU is now on her way to the NICU to check on tiny little baby Grey. The news is not good.

"Oh there you are Grace," said Carol upon catching glimpse of her walk into the room, "They've had to put the baby on a ventilator to help her breathe. Evidently this morning one of her lungs collapsed."

"Oh dear Lord!" replies an anguished Grace, "How is she doing otherwise."

"Still weak. Only weighs less than three pounds. But she's a fighter. All fourteen inches of that precious little darling is determined if it's in Gods will to survive."

Her grandmother smiles, "Much like her mother. And her father."

And speaking of her father…

…

An hour later after Sawyer has safely picked Teddy up from the plane, Christian with Taylor following behind come storming into the hospital and inquires at the front desk on his wife whereabouts. The receptionist calmly complies, "Hmm, Anastasia Grey. Still in ICU, room 10-B."

Without haste he rushes to find her and when successful his emotions take over as he stares at the figure of a young woman lying perfectly still in her bed, eyes shut tight and hooked up to equipment. A soft beeping noise is the only sound that can be heard in the room. With tearful eyes he gently puts her right hand in his, "Oh God Ana, I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am. I'm so ashamed! I've been such a fool. I don't know what got into me or why I even did it. It was weak and stupid of me and I will never forgive myself for hurting you so badly. I don't expect you to forgive me either. But I want you back in my life. I love you, Ana. Only you and I always have and always will. Please, please come back to me. I'm a wreck without you. I know I'm not worthy of your love anymore and you deserve a man far better than a wretched human being like me but I need you. You made me whole. You saved me! I'll never make it through life without you. I'll do anything to earn your trust again, anything. I want to make thing better baby, I want to make up for all the hurt and heartbreak I've caused you. Please, I beg of you, could you find it in your heart to…" He breaks down and starts sobbing uncontrollably. A more pitiful, remorseful sight there never was.

**Ana**

_What's that noise? It's so faint like, like someone's crying. Ugh! It's so dark and I feel like I've been climbing these stairs forever and getting nowhere. Hmm, there's another open door. Let me see, it leads down a dark black corridor to a couple of double doors. Come on swing them open already Ana, you know you want to. Oh look! A wedding! Wow, it's so beautiful! But, who's the lucky bride and groom? Wait. What? No, no it can't be! It's Christian? He's the groom? He's getting married again? Oh my god, don't tell me he's moving on. But, but why, how… come? What happened? Did I divorce him? Did he divorce me? Or… did I really die? If I didn't then I guess Elena was right after all. I wasn't enough for him and he's found someone who is! He doesn't look all that happy though. Now I'm really curious as to whom the bride is. Turn around so I can see you already! (gasp)This cannot be true! That's, that's her! That's the slut whore tramp Cassandra Zane? He's actually marrying the bitch? So he lied? He really did fall out of love with me and in love with her? Was his birth mother wrong when she told me he didn't? Oh Christian of all people why her? Please, someone tell me this is just a bad illusion or a joke! But if its not, I, I can't stand to watch it anymore. It's too damn depressing! I just want to cry! I want to go back to the safety of the darkness now please. (groan) Maybe I'll just stop climbing the stairs, and stay here forever! _

…

**Sawyer and Teddy**

He hurries toward his destination listening to the news on the car radio and according to the clock on the dashboard he's right on time. Pulling into the airport parking lot in his black SUV, Sawyer has come to pick up his little buddy from "Daddy and Unac Taywor" before those two can head off for the hospital to wait for any change in "Mommy's" recovery status. Safely buckled into his carseat it's time for 'boys day out' for Sawyer and Teddy.

"So Mr. T-Bear how did you like spending the night with your papa on that big plane?"

"Sooper! I had so much fun Unca Luke!"

"Good! So what did you guys do?"

"We pwayed games."

"Video games?"

"Yeah. I beat him!"

"I bet!" he chuckles, "You daddy's never been any good at them. What else did you do?"

"He sowed me all around his pwane. Said I'd own it one day and dat I fwy it one day!" Teddy's joyous smile turned to a frown. "I wanded to fwy it den but daddy said no way!"

"I agree with him. You're not big enough yet my man." Sawyer glanced in the rearview mirror and saw a pouting child. He wasn't about to spend the day with a brat. "Don't be so glum. Your daddy doesn't fly it either."

Teddy perked up with that revelation. Seems like his daddy passed the mercurial gene to his son. "He doesn't? Oh."

Sawyer grinned upon seeing a now satisfied little boy. "Nope. So what else did you do? Did you two talk any?"

"Um hum. About Mommy. And my new sister. Said both are in hospital sick and not ta worry. Can we go see her?"

"Sorry pal, not today. Your daddy's orders. Maybe tomorrow. What else did you guys talk about?"

"Daddy wanded ta know how I like it here. I said yes. It's fun. We go walking on the beach, ta the park, the pwaygwound, on Gweg's boat…"

Sawyer could just imagine Christian's ire at the mere mention of the man's name. And his rage if he knew his family was spending time with him. He wants more than anything to change the subject fast. "Say, did you have any breakfast this morning?"

"Juice, toast."

Well I know a special place we can go to. You can get pancakes there."

Jubilation shows on Teddy's face. "Oh boy! I wove pancakes!"

His approval is all Sawyer needs to cement the notion. Now he and Teddy are on their way to IHOP.

…

**A friend named Trudy**

A bouncy figure carrying a bouquet of flowers in her hand sweeps through the hospital doors. She sees a familiar face standing talking with another doctor. She doesn't hesitate approaching her with an inquiry. "Excuse me, I remember you from before. You're a friend of Anne's aren't you? Maybe you might be able to help me then. You don't happen to know how's she's doing do you? Oh by the way I'm Trudy King. I'm a friend of hers too."

Grace turns to address her and immediately recalls her too. "I remember you too. Hello, nice to see you again. Yes of course I can help you. She's fine, resting in ICU. Ana had to have an emergency C-section. The baby's in an incubator in the neonatal ward."

"Is it alright if I go see her?"

"I don't see why not. It's only her husband that's in with her right now."

A revelation of this magnitude leaves Trudy flabbergasted. "Husband? Anne is married?"

"Actually, her name is Anastasia Grey. Her husband is Christian Grey. He's my son."

"The billionaire? From Seattle? Huh! Well whadda you know. I think I remember my uncle mentioning his name awhile back. But not in a good way! In regards to a business venture that went sour. So, you're his mom huh? I guess that makes you Ana's mother-in-law."

"Yes, it does. Let's go find her shall we?"

Trudy keeps rambling as Grace walks her down a corridor in search of Ana's room. "I can't believe it! So Ana's married after all! Wow. And I thought she and Luke made such a cute couple and that Teddy was his son. But then I find out that Luke and Ana are actually brother and sister and not married which wouldn't make Luke Teddy's father unless of course he had gotten her pregnant… How long have the two of them been married?"

"Going on five years. Which would make Christian Teddy's father."

"Oh, well thank god that clears everything up then. Looks like I've been watching too many soap operas huh?"

Grace as always is careful not to let her annoyance show. "It sounds like it, yes. Ah, here we are. 10-B."

Taking a wary peek inside the room Trudy eyes the figure of Christian asleep in a chair pushed up to the right side of Ana's bed, his head using it as a pillow, his right arm draped over her legs and his left hand steadfastly holding on to her right. Trudy, ever the romantic, breathes a sigh and decides to let them be. "I just haven't the heart to disturb them," she whispers, "I can always come back tomorrow."

"Well" Grace whispers back, "seeing as you're already here today why not come with me and have a look at the baby. She's a determine little charmer."

Without a second thought needed Trudy jumps at the chance to accept Grace's kind offer. Halfway down the hall her friendly rambling continues, "You know my older sister Jenny's oldest daughter gave birth five weeks prematurely. She and her husband were just walking their dog and then pow, She goes into labor! I guess it's like Heidi Klum says: one day you're in and the next day you're out!"

A patient Grace rolls her eyes. _Wherever did you find this gem Ana?_

…

There is little excitement the rest of the day. A sentry-like Christian continues to his self-proclaimed duty: the gentle stroking of Ana's hand and silent repeats of pleas and apologies in hopes she'll respond by opening her eyes to gaze adoringly onto his tortured face and softly whisper "Christian I miss you, I love you and I want you back." Hours past and still no change, not even when he plants a light kiss on her lips. _Hey, it works in fairy tales_ _why not try it here? _But alas, Sleeping Beauty does not wake up. His desperate begging, "Please baby, please wake up. I'm not leaving until you do. I'm staying right here by your side, I'm here for you always. Please come back, please come back, please, come back," garners not a single acknowledgement either.

A bubbly nurse aide in pastel green scrubs comes striding in carrying in her hands the newest addition to Ana's ever growing collection of flowery, fragrant get-well wishes. They are beautiful: iris and orchids in a variety of tints and hues. Curious as he is Christian asks who sent them. "Greg." She says reading the attached card.

_What the hell? Who does that goddamn fucker think he is to send flowers to my wife for? That fucking asshole is going to fucking pay!_ "Send them away!" he growls.

"Leave them right where they are." Commands a person of motherly appearance. "Christian, you have no right to dictate what Ana can or cannot keep. They were sent to her not you. Besides they're lovely."

"Fine." He heaves, yielding to Grace's scolding.

"You really need to take a break, son." She says as two nurses enter behind her.

"I can't!" he snaps, "I won't. Not until she wakes up. I want my face to be the first one she sees when she does."

"Then give_ her_ the break! Let these nurses do their job. Let them tend to her, check her wound, change her dressing because I have something you need to do that's just as important."

"What that?"

"I want you to go see your daughter. She's struggling and could really use her daddy."

Christian's heart wrenches at the news. _Struggling? My little girl is_ _struggling?_ Knowing that to be the case he doesn't hasten to follow his mother's lead. _Wait for me my dear Ana. I_ _won't be gone long._

They arrive at the Neonatal unit and Grace crooks her finger to motion Christian inside. His eyes glaze over as he stares at the little bundle of joy quietly lying in the incubator. "Would you like to touch her?" asks one of the nurses. He trembles at the thought but relishes the request. "Carefully put your hands through the holes at the side of the incubator like this and just gently touch her, don't rub. Her skins far too delicate for that yet."

He's apprehensive at first but soon obliges. And it is a thrill he will never soon forget. If simply placing his long slender fingers on the infant's itty bitty body could bring a lump to his throat imagine what happens when three of her wee ones wrap around one of his. "She knows me!" he squeals in amazement then relinquishes tears. "My baby girl knows me!"

"Of course she does Mr. Grey, and now you know her better too. It's very important for a preemie to feel the nearby presence of one or both parents. It helps form a warm comforting bond and that's a tremendous aid to this critical part of their early growth and development outside of the womb. For some the closeness gives them the will and strength to continue on. And this little miracle right here needs all the strength she can get. Would you like to stay with her a little longer?"

As nervous and afraid as he was at the beginning Christian finds it difficult to take leave of his daughter's side now. His soft gray eyes are pools of adoration, "Yes, I'd love that."

Fifteen more minutes spent with 'Papa's petite angel' later and Christian and Grace finally leave the NICU. He beams with an indescribable feeling of gratification. "You know what Mom, I know I'm the reason she's in that incubator now but I'm going to try my best to make sure she doesn't have to stay there."

He hurries back to Ana, anxious to share his exciting accomplishment with her. He takes her right hand in his, brings it to his lips and softly kisses her knuckles. "I saw our daughter today Ana. I touched her. She held on to my finger, she knows me! You have to meet her. You just have to. She's another reason for you to wake up. She needs you just as much as Teddy and I do if not more." Christian takes a seat and stays with his beloved for the next few hours lovingly caressing her hand, and running his fingers through her shoulder length hair its chestnut color now almost completely grown back. Taylor comes and informs Christian it's time now to pick up Teddy. Before leaving he lightly brushes his fingers down her cheek and whispers, "I love you so much, Ana. I'm off to get Teddy now. He loves you too. But I'll be back tomorrow."

…

**Ana**

_Oh Lord, it feels like I've been climbing these stairs for ages but to no avail. But the voices I'm hearing keep getting louder the higher I climb. Does that mean I'm closer to the light? Oh when will I escape this darkness? Is it through that door over there? Is that the way at last? But wait. Maybe I shouldn't open that door. What was behind the other two doors turned out to be crummy! But then again they say third times a charm so maybe… Okay, let's see. The door's really heavy. Ugh! Taking all my strength to open. Gosh, I hope it's worth it. Oh rats! Another long, dark, corridor! This time, leading to two double doors. Get ready Ana, to swing them open and quite possibly be free at last! (gasp) No. It can't be. There's nothing but ruin here. Everything's gone. Burnt to the ground. Destroyed. Deserted. The smoky smell is nasty! Is this where I'm to end up? Trapped in a sea of desolation? Alone? Confused?... I can't! I don't want to. It's too depressing here! I'm going back to the darkness and start climbing again. I just know I'm going to reach the top soon. _

…

**Early the next morning**

Christian shows up to the hospital bright and early, a cup of coffee in hand and an enthusiastic grin on his face. First on his list is to head on over and visit with Ana for a bit. There are so many flowers from friends and well-wishers one would tend to think they were in a garden or a florist shop but not a hospital room. Her status hasn't changed any since yesterday but never will he give up hope. He goes to her side, gently rubs her arm, strokes her hair and starts discussing the events of last night, how much she is loved and missed, that Gail sends her best and Teddy told him to give his mommy a great big hug and he can't wait to see her again. A quick kiss on her plump but dry lips and it's off to spend time with their little girl.

While he's in the NICU cooing with the yet unnamed Grey family member a nurse has checked Ana over, changed her saline bag then leaves to tend to her other duties. The room feels peaceful and calm once more until… a few more, including her boss Vivian, visitors come to see her.

"Oh, my God, did you see that?" "Yeah I did. She moved." "Quick! Go get someone I think she might be…"

One of them runs out of Ana's room and down the hall, "Hey, hey she's waking up!" Trudy yells frantically, "Ana, I mean, Mrs. Grey is waking up!"

Christian, who has just left the NICU and his and Ana's daughter has come into earshot and hears her exclamation. He rushes over to his wife's room as if his butt was on fire determined to be the first person Ana sees.

It happens. She's reached the top; found her way out of the darkness. Her eyes flutter open; she looks around the room then gazes into the familiar gorgeous face of the man in front of her who's holding her hand and smiling.

"Hey." She says softly, smiling back.

"Hey to you too."

"Where am I? What are you doing here?"

**AA/N: I have a few 'thank yous' to make.**

**First: To Lobster33 for the wonderful and helpful information regarding the feelings and emotions experienced that goes with parenting a premature infant. She's right, accuracy is important.**

**Second: To cmwiseman for some terrific story ideas. Wow!**

**Third: To all the readers and fans of this story. You guys are awesome! **


	15. Chapter 15

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 15

Victory or Defeat

**A/A: I'm sorry for the very late update (please don't hate me!) but the holidays have me swamped. But ta-da! Finally! Here's Chapter 15! **

Ana is now awake! The light that eluded her for days has now been found. She lies in bed, her mind a befuddled mess. Everything is strange to her; nothing makes any sense. Especially the reason why she's in a hospital room that is filled with an overwhelming floral scent instead of being in her own bedroom that smells faintly of the sea. She is very perplexed too by her heighten sense of touch. Why are the soft items such as her blanket, feeling so velvety to her fingertips? While solid items, take for example her metal hospital bed, feeling extremely hard and cold? But what Ana finds not too terribly difficult to comprehend is her weakened state, the terrible dryness and yucky taste in her mouth, and her vision. Though blurry at first it clears after a few blinks thus recognition of her surroundings and the people amongst her a breeze particularly the very handsome gentleman who is smiling and holding onto her hand.

Yes. Ana has returned from the darkness. The room is full of joyous relief for all… except for the crestfallen fellow standing by the doorway frozen like a statue with his hands clenched tight in fists and fuming to the core. _Why did it have to be that motherfucker's face Ana saw first? It was suppose to be mine. I'm the one and only one she should have set eyes on not him. Why, I'm going to kill that arrogant asshole. If that son-of-a-bitch thinks he's going to take my wife away from me he's got another thing coming. That fucker's going to pay big time if he even dares to try!_ Before Christian could dare move one step further a strong hand grabs his shoulder thus bringing a halt to his plan. "Making a scene ain't gonna get ya anywhere or win back Ana's heart." whispers Taylor. "Come with me, Boss. I think your mom's got a better idea."

…

**Ana**

Wha… what's going on? How come we're not at the park? We were just there a few minutes ago so what gives? What's happened? Why is Greg here? Why is he standing at the side of my bed holding onto my hand? Not that I'm complaining mind you after all he is one gorgeous, sexy man. I'm just confused as to why he's here? And why I'm here and not at the park with Trudy and Teddy and Sawyer? Oh my God, where are they? Are they okay? Are they safe? _Why don't you ask Greg those questions? Surely he should know. _Yes, you're right. He should, shouldn't he? That's a good idea. I'll ask him right now. I'll look straight into his beautiful baby blue eyes and just…"Hey."… melt like a warm chocolate bar.

"Hey to you too."

"Where am I? What are you doing here?"

"You're in the hospital Ana," he answers, brushing a few stray strands of hair from my face. "Have been for two days. As for what I'm doing here, it's because like all your other friends I'm concerned about you."

"Two days? Seriously? Two days? But, how come?"

I'm listening intently for him to speak but he doesn't get the chance.

"Oh my God, you're finally awake! Yea! Ana, welcome back!"

"Trudy? You're okay? How's Teddy? Is he okay too?"

"Aw yeah, he's fine, he's safe. He's with Luke right now. Jeez gal, did you ever have us worried!"

"I did? But how?"

She scowls at Greg, "You didn't tell her? Ana, you fainted in the park and went into premature labor. Why you almost…"

"Ana! You're finally awake? Oh, oh my. Oh thank goodness. You gave us all quite a scare."

_What the hell is Grace doing here?_

"I'm so glad you came back to us. How are you feeling now?"

_What is the kindest woman I know, one I can't help_ _but love like I do my own mother, doing here?_ "Confused. Very, confused. Uh, what day is it?"

"It's Monday dear. You've been here in the hospital since Saturday."

Huh? I may have reached the light but I've never felt so much in the dark. I desperately need answers and here's just the person to ask. "Grace, will you tell me everything that happened please? Why I'm here, why you're here?"

I notice Greg lean over and suggest that he and Trudy do something she'd rather not. "Trudy, I think you and I should leave and let them talk in private, don't you?"

Of course she's none to happy, it's made evident by her sneer. But Trudy reluctantly complies with his request anyway. "Oh, alright. Nice to see you again, Dr. Trevelyn."

Grace waits until they've left the room to start filling me in the missing pieces. "Ana, you were rushed here to French Hospital on Saturday afternoon after collapsing in the park and going into premature labor. You fell into an unconscious state and have been in that condition for two days. The doctors had to perform an emergency C-section or you and the baby would have died. You did die! In the OR!"

I can't believe what she just told me. "I did what? I, I died?" Out of nowhere I hear a sweet voice in my mind, _"Yes, it does. But you_ _don't have to be. You can still go back."_

"Time of death was just about to be pronounced when a faint heartbeat was found. My guess is you just weren't ready to die yet."

"What about my baby? Is she alive or did she…" The word is poison to my ears. I refuse to think it's even possible. _… she's fighting for her life…_

"Your baby is in NICU. She's tiny, Ana and very weak. They've put her in an incubator and because her poorly developed lungs collapsed she's been hooked up to a ventilator since yesterday. She's doing better but not out of the woods, not by a long shot."

I feel trampled on by a herd of elephants. My eyes are blind with tears; my lower lip quivers. No, it couldn't be. Not my sweet little baby girl. "Do you think she has a chance to survive Grace?"

"Yes. Yes I do! And so should you. She won't give up without a fight so you shouldn't give up on her. I'm sure not going to."

"Tell me how you found out Grace. Who told you?"

"Don't be mad at him Ana. It was Luke. He panicked. You were in such bad shape he wasn't sure you were going to make it to the hospital alive. He figured under the circumstances, whatever fate may come to be that a member of the Grey family should be informed. Knowing I was aware of your pregnancy already he called me at work, told me what had happened. The second I hung up with him I was on that plane. I wanted to be here for you no matter what. That's how much you mean to me, Ana. How much you mean to us all. We've been here the whole time. We've never left."

"We?" Oh no. I pale at the very idea of whom else might have come.

"I brought Dr. Greene with me. She's been with the baby since day one and kept an expert tab on her condition. And I know you're going to hate me but there was a possibility of him losing both of you so I brought Christian along with me too."

My breath hitches; the monitors go crazy at the mere mention of his name.

"Please don't be angry with me, Ana. I've kept your secret for weeks now and would've continued to do so but I'm sorry, he does deserves to know."

"I know he does and I'm not angry. If anything, relieved. He was bound to find out eventually. I just didn't want it to be this soon." I close my eyes in hopes my woes will disappear. A stray tear runs down my already stained cheek. "Grace, I don't think I'm ready to see him yet. In fact I know I'm not. Please, just tell him to go away."

She breathes a heavy sigh, "I can't. He's already here."

…

This will be the first in four long months Ana sets sight on Christian. Her mood is a myriad of complexities ranging from anger to zeal. She turns her head toward the door to watch as Christian, Dr Greene and a nurse named Trisha come wheeling in tiny baby Grey, incubator and all just so her mother can view their beautiful bundle from heaven. "Look who we have here!" He beams with unlimited pride ready to share with Ana the same feelings of elation and joy that he experienced from gazing upon their delicate little baby for the very first time.

She gasps adoringly at their daughter's 'premiere debut'. "Oh she's gorgeous." her mother coos, "So fragile looking, like a China doll."

"Yes she's quite the looker." Christian elects, "Just like her mother."

Ana's far too busy devoting her attention toward the lovely little lady in the incubator to give Christian's complement any regard. "When can I hold her Dr. Greene?"

"I'm afraid that won't be for awhile yet. Two weeks, maybe longer. We'll have to see day by day then make a decision."

"Ana, I've touched her. I can't explain how amazing it feels. And she knows me. She grabbed onto my finger and held it. He knows I'm her daddy!"

Again his valiant effort to gain her attention goes unnoticed.

"I know you don't want to give her up yet but we really need to take her back to the NICU and put her on a ventilator again, okay? Take care of yourself now, Ana and may I say how wonderful it is to see you again." Grace assists Dr. Greene and Trisha in the returning of her granddaughter so leaving Christian and Ana alone. He smiles nervously like a teenager on a first date; unsure of what to say hoping the longing in his gray eyes alone will speak volumes. And she's feeling just as awkward in a room being swallowed up in agonizing tension.

Ana is the first to pull back the silent veil between them. "Congratulations, Christian." She says smiling shyly.

His heart bursts free with exhilaration; he's so filled with happiness he wants to cry. Could this be the start of a fresh new beginning? "Yes," he sighs, "Our daughter's something isn't she?"

"That's not what I meant."

Christian cocks his head with dubious curiosity. "What then?"

"What I meant was, congratulations Christian, you found me! Now please, just go and leave me alone."

He stands by her side as woebegone a soul as before. "Please, Ana, please. Won't you…"

"Christian, just because we have a daughter now and I might have died doesn't mean anything's changed. It hasn't. There's no use pretending nothing happened. It did. And before we can move forward and try to fix our marriage if it's at all plausible our marriage can be fixed there's a ton of shit we have to go through first. Now is not the time or place to do so. Besides, I'm not ready or feel like addressing those issues yet. So will you do as I ask and please leave? I'd much rather be alone."

Christian's plan has failed. A lump forms in his throat and a raspy, "If that's what you want," comes from his lips as he unsuccessfully holds back tears. "I only want to make you happy." This fallen, dejected man turns to leave as per his wife's request. He stops halfway to the door, turns to look back, his lower lip quivering, "Is it okay if I come back?"

"Just go, Christian!" Ana demands as she turns on her side away from him and buries her head in the pillow.

His heart feels as heavy as an anvil as he walks out the door with head hung low. "It didn't work." He whispers to a waiting Taylor.

Taylor gives his boss a comforting pat on the shoulder, "Don't you dare give up boss. Just because she didn't come around this time doesn't mean she won't the next. You gotta keep the faith."

"I won't. I can't. I'll never give up trying to win my Ana back! It's just… I don't think she wants me back."

Meanwhile Ana's pillow has become drenched with tears. She can't seem to stop crying. "Why did he have to come?" she sobs endlessly.

That sweet voice haunts her mind again_. "Because he really loves and cares about you..." "…misses you terribly." "…wants you back." _

"I know. Same here. That's what makes this so hard. I don't know if I want him back."

Exhausted from weeping, Ana fell into a deep sleep. She stirs when she feels someone stroking her hair. Her eyes open to gaze upon a smiling Grace.

"I take it things did not go well with my son."

"I'm sorry. I just couldn't look him in the face. I treated him horribly too."

"Don't worry, he understands. I know this isn't going to be an easy road for either one of you but I'm here to help if I can."

"Grace, what would you have done if Carrick had cheated on you?"

"You really want to know? I would have cut off his fucking balls with a dirty scalpel!"

Ana couldn't help but wince at the thought and break out in a fit of giggles. She found it very amusing to hear a woman like Grace cuss. "Grace!"

"What! It's true! And after I was sure he suffered enough I still wouldn't offer him antiseptic. If he tried to cheat on me again well, let's just say, he'd never have an erection again."

"Oh Grace, I love you. You make me feel so much better! But you know what would make me feel even better? If I could see Teddy again."

"Well, what a coincidence!" she smirks, "There's a little certain someone who's waiting to see you too!"

In pops a joyous little four-year-old anxious to climb into his mother's arms. "Mmoommmmyy! I've missed you!"

I've missed you too, Teddy Bear!"

And waiting by the door is his father hoping some day soon she will crawl into his. _And I've missed you, Ana. More than you'll ever know!_

**AA/N: Thanks to my fans, followers and the readers, **_**Happy Holidays!**_


	16. Chapter 16

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 16

From the mouths of babes

**A/N: God, I am so sorry for no update! The holidays left me with no time to write. I just got a chance yesterday so here you are, chapter 16. I hope you like it. **

The afternoon seems brighter now that Ana has her little man in her arms. His jubilation over seeing his mommy again is only matched by hers for him. He sits on her hospital bed all smiles and elation as they talk and hug and laugh and giggle and catch up on these past few days they've had to spend apart. It pains her to think, she might not have had the chance to gaze into his shiny gray eyes, tussle his copper hair or kiss his chubby cheeks again if her fate had taken a different course. Ana knows that deep down inside that no matter how much she can't stand him right now the same applies to her feelings for Christian.

As for somber Christian who stands outside the open doorway wishing more than anything he could be part of the reunion too, he finds leaving to be one difficult option. The urge to stay and eavesdrop on their joyous visit is too great; more than he can bear. But he finds the strength to fight his weakness, his 'stalker-like tendency' so out of a deep respect he has for Ana and her need of privacy he slowly turns and with a heart that feels like a ton of lead walks away, back down the hall toward a waiting Taylor.

"Boss, Welch just called me. Evidently Ros has been trying to get a hold of you. There's a problem at the office they need you for. I guess it must be important if she can't handle it."

Christian is puzzled and starts searching for his Blackberry. _Why the fuck wasn't she_ _able to get a hold of me?_ Then it dawns on him. He had turned it off when in the NICU with the baby so as not to be disturbed. He quickly dials Ros to find out the urgency; why he is needed. From the fierce look on his face the news can't be good. He paces back and forth, runs his fingers through his hair in frustration then hangs up in a fury and walks back over toward Taylor, "Call the airport and ready the plane. You and I have to go back. There's a merger going sour and Ros can't handle it alone. I'll go find mother and tell her I'm leaving, that I have no choice." Naturally Taylor gets right to it as Christian heads off in search of Grace. He finds her heading down the corridor toward Ana's room. "Mom, thank God I found you. Believe me, this is the last thing I want to do under the circumstances but it can't be helped. Taylor and I have to go back to Seattle. It's got to do with business. I should only be gone overnight so if you wouldn't mind staying here and keeping me posted on Ana and the baby I'd really appreciate it. I realize this has been quite an imposition on not only you but on Dr. Greene so if she needs to return to Seattle I'll gladly take her back with me but that's up to her."

"How soon were you planning on leaving?"

"In an hour or as soon as the plane is ready." Christian pauses to take in a big breath. With head bent down staring at his shoes, "Uh, it might not matter or she probably doesn't give a damn anymore but you know I'll never stop caring about Ana. I just wish that somehow she knew. Maybe you could let her know if it should somehow come up in a conversation. It probably won't though so there's no real reason worrying. Keep an eye out for Teddy too. I know he's in very safe hands with Sawyer but that doesn't stop me from being concerned."

"I know you do dear and I will. Just go, take care of the problem at work and come back safely. Everything will be fine here I promise you. If there is any change I will call you personally. And again I don't know how many times I need to stress this to you because I know the situation looks dismal right now but it won't always be. Trust me. Just be patient and things will turn around! Now, you have to do me a favor. Just let your father know I'm fine and I'll be home soon." She cups his stubbly face between her hands, "You see, he worries about me just like you worry about Ana. And I'll be sure to explain your absence to Teddy in a way he'll understand. Now be gone with you. Shoo!"

He softly chuckled and kissed his mother on the cheek. "Thanks. Oh, have I ever told you how much I love you?"

"Once or twice. But I never get tired of hearing it."

Just then Christian's Blackberry rings again. "Grey. Okay. That's fine, in ten then. Thank you." He hangs up and starts to speak, but Grace is quicker.

"Don't worry about Carol just go!" she demands, practically pushing her son and Taylor out the hospitals doors.

Once outside Taylor feels brave and has the urge to remark, "Boy Boss, your mom sure reminds me of Gail: a stubborn, classy dame."

Christian smiles, his eyes full of compassion, "Yeah I know. We should all be so fortunate."

…

**Ana and Teddy**

Teddy plants a sloppy kiss on his mother's cheek and takes another sip of his apple juice box. His mind is agog with so many questions where to begin is a query into itself. "Momma, awe you okay?"

"Of course I am. And even better now that you're here."

"But you musta been sick! Only sick people come here. Dat's wa Aund Twudy says. Were you sick Momma?"

"Hmm, sort of. But now you have a new baby sister!"

"I know! Dat wa Daddee told me too! He said she sick too. Wa wong? Will she be okay?"

"Yes she will. She was born too small so the doctors and nurses are keeping her someplace so she'll get nice and strong. Like you!"

Teddy bursts into a fit of giggles and Ana beams with delight. No sweeter music than a child's laughter in her book. "Momma, can I see her?"

"Umm, sorry sweetie, not yet. I've only gotten to see her one time but let me tell you she's awfully pretty. And she'll need a big brother like you. Are you ready to be a big brother?

He nods his head up and down so fast he looks like a bobble-head toy. "Yes I am!" he proclaims proudly.

"So, tell me. What have you been doing since I last saw you on Saturday? Have you been a good boy for Uncle Luke?"

"Yea an for Aund Twudy, Unca Taywor an Daddee too."

Ana's heart begins to pound causing the blood pressure monitor to rise. She can't help it. Christian still has an affect on her that way. Her emotions are varied: from happiness, anger, jealousy, the list goes on. "Oh? What did you do with Daddy?"

" We, I spend nights wi him on his pwane de one dats gonna be mine someday. He say so. It's big, it's pwetty. And we pway games, vido games. I beat him evwy time."

A recollection of her doing the same makes her smile. "Did you two talk? What about?"

There goes the bobble head again! "We talk about awada tings. About me. He wand know how I wike it here. I say good. Wad I wike ta do. Walk on ta beach, pway at ta pwaygwoud, see ta seals, go on Unca Gweg's big boat."

"Oh I bet he liked that one! What else? Did you talk about me?"

"Uh huh. Daddee misses you awot. Do you miss him?"

His question sets her back a bit. "Yes Teddy, I do."

Teddy takes another sip of apple juice and empties the box. He innocently asks his mother the next question. "Don't you love Daddee anymore?"

She's shocked and angry assuming he'd been prompted to ask her that by Christian. "Why would you ask me that? Did your daddy ask you to?"

"Uh, Uh! But I see an hear tings like you at night time. You cwy an have bad dweams. You say his name. I always wand ta cwal indo bed wit you an make dem go away but Unca Luke always stops me. He hears you too. And Daddee cwys an has bad dweams too. An he doesn't live wit us. Why not? Dats why I ask. Do you still love Daddee?"

Tears well up in Ana's eyes. How does she answer? And why is her son smarter than she. "Yes I do. With all my heart! But things are complicated right now baby. Someday I'll be able to tell you but I can't right now."

As if like clockwork in walks Grace. "I think your mommy needs some rest now and your Uncle Luke is waiting for you."

Still visibly emotional Ana reaches for her boy. "Come here and give me a great big hug before you leave." Her arms wrap around him so tight it's a miracle he could breathe. "I love you my Teddy Bear."

Another sloppy kiss on the cheek, "I love you too Momma. I'll be back tommowo, okay?"

"You better!" Ana gives Grace a grateful smile, turns over and starts sobbing in her pillow. _What am I doing to him? What are we doing to him Christian?_

…

A few hours later Christian and Taylor finally return back home, tired, worn and frustrated. Gail had dinner ready for her two men: chicken marsala, and the divine smell as they walked in the room had their mouths watering and lips smacking all in anticipation of its yummy good taste. At least there was one good reason to be home: Gail's delicious feasts.

After dinner Christian retreated into his study to fire up the computer and see if he can find out some information about the merger going awry. He opens his desk drawer and there it is the manila envelope he received a few days ago. _Shit!_ Immediately Taylor is called into the office. Within seconds the trusted bodyguard is at the door, "You called me sir?"

"Yes. I'm going to need your help with something." Taylor comes and stands in front of the desk and Christian slides him the envelope. "I want you to take a look at this."

He takes the envelope and opens the flap not expectant of its contents. His first reaction made his eyes draw wide and a let out a sharp whistle. "Damn! Are you sure the bitch is pregnant? Maybe it's some kind of a scam."

"That's what I want you to find out. If this isn't a scam and she really is pregnant with my child there's no fucking way in hell I'm ever going to get Ana back!"

"I'm right on it Boss. Oh, uh, you know, I never did like that Cassy woman. Struck me as an opportunistic er,… slut from the start. I know, too little too late. I wish now I'd told you from the very beginning how I felt."

"Thank you Jason. But…" He heaves a breath, "I doubt if my self-righteous, arrogant, son-of-a-bitch ego would have even listened. So caught up in my own wants and needs, not giving a damn about Ana and Teddy or how my actions would affect them." His voice reeked of self-loathing disgust. "And now_ this_ little gem!"

"Don't worry, we'll get to the bottom of this. That Cassy dame ain't gonna get away with shit!"

"You know what still bugs me, are the pictures. Who took them and who sent them to Ana?"

"Well, I don't mean to brag but I'm quite the mystery aficionado and I'll bet anything Ms. Zane's the one! She took the pictures and then sent them to Ana. Not just once but twice." Taylor, now pleased to have voiced an opinion his boss deemed worthy of consideration, quickly exited his boss's office eager to begin the task entrusted unto him.

Christian found it almost an impossibility to keep his concentration on spreadsheets and financial figures and had to force himself to do so. His shoulders felt the weight of numerous tons. He needed some sort of release. Picking up the phone he dialed two friends: Claude Bastille for a kickboxing bout and Dr. John Flynn for some serious advice and counsel. Surely they could be of some help. Anything was worth the effort.

…

**Flynn in the Morning**

The clock on his Blackberry reads 7:52am. Since he always makes it a habit to arrive early, Christian is on time for his 8:00am session with Dr. John Flynn. He's shown great improvement during these past three months: he's more relaxed, able to control his anger (to a point), take criticism and most importantly, willing to communicate more freely. Christian strides into Flynn's office wearing his signature gray Armani suit, white cotton shirt and black silk tie feeling less tense since his 6:00am workout with Bastille… but the signs of stress are still ever present. "Welcome, Christian," the good doctor says as they shake hands then take their usual seats, Christian on the dark brown leather couch and he in the soft leather chair right across. "So, what's new since I saw you the last?"

The rapture cannot be contained any further. "I've found Ana!" he rejoices in wide eyed elation, "and I'm a daddy again!"

"Congratulations! Sounds like you've had quite a weekend."

Christian's joy begins to fade replaced by uneasy doubt. "You can say that."

"I get the feeling it didn't turn out as you would have hoped. Let's begin with Ana. How did you find her and where?"

"Sawyer called my mother on Saturday to let her know that Ana had gone into premature labor…"

This shocking news takes Flynn back, "Ana's was pregnant? How far along was her pregnancy?"

"Six months."

"So Ana was pregnant when she left. Tell me, why of all the family members would Sawyer call your mother?"

"Because she was the only one of us who knew of Ana's condition. She found out three weeks ago after accidentally bumping into Ana at a hospital."

"And where was this?"

"San Luis Obispo, California."

"Ana's been in California this whole time then. Why didn't your mother tell you about this three weeks ago?"

"Because, she was just abiding by Ana's wishes. Ana didn't want any of us to know. Hell, she didn't even want my mom to know! She especially didn't want me to know!"

"Tell me Christian, how does that make you feel to know Ana didn't want you to be included?"

"Hurt of course, but mostly confused. Because I can't blame her for not wanting to tell me! Not after what I did to her."

"But Christian, it's your child. She was wrong to not tell you. You had a moral right to know. Surely you can see that."

"I broke her heart! I broke our wedding vows! I did the worst thing a husband could do! It's payback time, that's all!"

Flynn realizes he's at an impasse. At this time, nothings going to change Christian's mind. "Lets get back to the Saturday Ana was rushed to the hospital. Do you know any of the specifics?"

"Mom told me that Sawyer informed her that Ana was unconscious at the time. She and/or the baby could have died so they had to perform an emergency C section." Tears begin to well in his eyes, "Ana did die." The notion still hits him like a ton of bricks and he's this close to falling apart. Miraculously he gains control of his emotions and a smile forms on his face, "But she came back. They brought her back. I'd like to think she came for me but I'd be lying. She came back for Teddy and the baby and… her new life in California. But not me."

"Why do you think that?"

"Because after two days of unconsciousness she finally woke up. I wanted it to be my face she saw but it wasn't!" He became furious; his brow furrowed and jaw clenched. "It was that shithole Greg Christiansen! When she did see me she told me to go away. That she doesn't want to talk to me or see me again. In her eyes don't exist."

"Christian you know that's not true. You're a major part of her life just as she is of yours. Plus you're the father of her children. Those a huge factors not easily forgotten. Now tell me about the baby. Have you seen it?"

Christian's face lights up like a Christmas tree. "Yes! A little girl! She's beautiful like her mother. And fragile. She's in an incubator and on a ventilator because her lungs collapsed already. But she's getting stronger every day. I touched her! She knows me. She knows I'm her daddy!"

"And that is an important sign. You have to give, Ana more time She'll eventually come around. Don't give up having faith."

"Everyone says that so there must truth to it."

"Exactly. Now here's another thing: quit beating yourself up, tearing down your self-worth. That's not healthy. It only heightens depression. You don't need that right now in your life. It won't help the situation if you're feeling down every day it'll make it worse. Do you understand?"

"Yes. I think so. I'll have to try harder then. Who knows? Could be possible."

"WILL be possible. You should never doubt your abilities. Now, I have suspicion we've barely scratched the surface of your disturbances. So Christian, what else is troubling you"

Christian takes a deep breath, "It's the affair. I haven't been completely honest about it."

"In what way?"

"When you asked if Cassy was my submissive, I said no but she was. When you asked about kinkyfuckry, I said no there wasn't but there was. She wasn't into the BDSM lifestyle but curious about it. So everytime we'd meet at the hotel I'd take items from the playroom like floggers and whips and we would have scenes. She loved it. Couldn't get enough. Turned out to be a perfect submissive. So I contracted her. I didn't lie about never taking her to Escala because I never did. She showed up on her own in the car I provided for her, the car I provided all my subs with. And we'd use the playroom. But I never took her into the bedroom. I was always Christian the Dominant never the lover like I was with Ana. There was never one ounce of intimacy. It was all about control. It was never Cassy I was controlling it was Ana. It was never Cassy in the playroom or at the hotel. It was Ana. I'd close my eyes and it was Ana I'd be fucking and controlling and sucking my cock! All because I was being denied the pleasures at home! Our marriage was at it's worst. And I was at my weakest and gave in to those suppressed needs. The horrible part was I was enjoying myself so much. I was a powerful Master again. I look back and think how could I have been such a selfish bastard to jeopardize my marriage like that and hurt my wife and family. Sick, twisted bastard! If I could only take those two months back! But I can't so now I'm paying the penalties as well I should."

"But Christian the fact you feel remorse and guilt now is good."

"Yeah, right! But you haven't heard the worst part. Cassy may be pregnant with my child."

Flynn's pen fell from his hand. "If she _is _pregnant, how sure can you be that you're the baby's father? I know for a fact you're a stickler for protection."

"That's what Taylor's looking into now. He's pretty sure it's a scam."

"What if it's not? What are you going to do then?"

"I don't know. I'll have to wait until we find out to make a decision. But if the baby is mine there's no way Ana will ever come back into my life. I will have lost her for good. And I'm fifty shades at fault."

**AA/N: You readers are very special to me so to all…**

_**HAPPY NEW YEAR! **_


	17. Chapter 17

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 17

Causes, affects and a GILF

**A/N: Excuse me for this terribly late update. I've had a bad cold and haven't written much. But finally, here's chapter 17! Better late than never huh!**

Ana sits in her hospital bed reading a magazine for quiet entertainment, and stops at an article about a celebrity's marriage falling apart and ending in divorce. She stops reading and begins to reflect on her and Christian's own failing marriage; what caused it to go awry in the first place.

"_Ana, why didn't you take security with you?"_

"_Relax, it was only lunch with Kate."_

"_Only lunch with Kate? Then I hope her security was there."_

"_No. For once we wanted some alone-time by ourselves."_

"_No? No! How stupid of the both of you then. How could you take that kind of a risk? What if something had happened to either one of you?"_

"_Well nothing did, did it? I'm home in one piece aren't I? Unscathed! And how dare you call us stupid!"_

"_I wouldn't have to if you hadn't pulled a foolish stunt like that! How could you have been so inconsiderate of me, of yourself and most of all Teddy? Why couldn't you and Kate just have lunch here at home instead of running around Seattle unprotected? You could have been killed!"_

"_Sorry Mister control-freak warden but occasionally we like to escape the confines of our million dollar prisons!"_

"_A prison? Is that what you consider this place to be? I'm only trying to keep you safe, Ana! And now because of your dumb escapade someone's going to get fired!"_

"_Don't. You. Dare fire a soul! It's not their fault I had to sneak out undetected so me and my best friend and sister-in-law could have a nice enjoyable lunch for a change!"_

"_Boy, do you have that right!"_

"_Fuck you, Christian!" _

Other painful instances came to mind. Some of them never were settled.

"_How could you do that Christian? How could you embarrass me in front of your family like that?"_

"_What do you mean, Ana?"_

"_Don't play dumb! You know exactly what I mean. We agreed that we weren't going to go vacation with our family this year, that we'd take a one by ourselves, and we'd tell them so today at the picnic at your parent's house. When the subject came up at the table I start to give our condolences only to be blindsided and left to look like a fool when you rudely interrupted me with 'Of course we're going Ana. Why would you think we wouldn't?' Christian, you should have given me the courtesy of telling me you had changed your mind."_

"_It was spur of the moment. I got talking to Elliott and decided to change our plans. No big deal."_

"_Yeah big deal! Especially since you made a promise. Now call your parents tomorrow and cancel or else I will. Oh, and nice going humiliating the way you did." _

"_Fine, Ana, I will. I'll do what you say. You're the boss, okay? And I apologize, I was wrong. But you're making way too much out of this."_

"_Well I don't. Mainly because you neglected to tell me, and that hasn't been the first time! I have a strange feeling I've been kept in the dark about a lot of things lately."_

"_Oh for God sakes quit being so dramatic! Drop it already!" _

"_No, I'm not going to! This is serious. Christian, is there anything else…"_

"_I said drop it Ana! I'm not keeping secrets from you! Now quit being so fucking paranoid!"_

"_I'll quit being fucking paranoid when you stop sounding so guilty!"_

"_I refuse to discuss this any further…" _

Ana saddens to reminiscence that like countless others before that argument only got worse ending in either to a full blown screaming match or one of them leaving in the middle of the night or both.

"_Ana, I think we should have a serious talk tonight."_

"_About what?"_

"_About you, I, our marriage."_

"_What about our marriage? It's fine."_

"_It is not 'fine'. It's not even 'okay'. Not when we keep fighting and/or ignoring each other the way we are."_

"_I ignore you? I'm not ignoring you right now. So fine! You want to talk, we'll talk after dinner if you're even home for dinner that is and I put Teddy to bed seeing as you don't seem to find any time for him either! Now I've got to get out of here or I'm going to be late. And there's nothing wrong with our marriage!"_

"_Ana!"_

That was just one of the discussion that never materialized. None of them had. Not even the ones scheduled with Dr. Flynn. Ana winces upon having to admit that her birth father was right, _"...he wasn't all to blame for your marriage falling apart. You had a_ _part in it too." "…quit being in denial…". "People like Gail and Kate tried to tell you so but you refused to listen to what they had to say." _How stupid of her not to realize their marriage was on the verge of breaking in half when others around her could. How disgusted she felt of herself for being so damn oblivious! This whole mess might have been avoided if the two of them had simply communicated! But would that have stopped the affair?

A soft knock on the door brought her out of her self imposed hypnotic state. "May we come in?"

Ana looks over and lit up like the summer sun when she saw these three familiar faces joined by Grace. "Kate! Mia! Mom? Is that really you?"

"Of course it is Steele!" Kate smirks, adding the large bouquet of red roses she carries to add to Ana's ever-growing floral collection. "Nothing's going to keep 'The Sisterhood of the Traveling Aunts and Grandmas' away."

Mia comes to her sister-in-law's side carrying a massive arrangement of Mylar and multicolored latex balloons. "Oh Ana, I so glad you're okay! You don't know how much I've missed you!"

Her myriad of emotions and gallons of tears flow freely as Carla's arms wrap tight around her daughter. Ana is quick to follow suit. "Oh, my baby, my baby, my baby girl. Thank heaven you're alive! I don't know what I would have done if I had lost you!"

Ana clutches her mother even tighter, "Oh Mommy, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Kate, Mia," Grace whispers, "Why don't we give them some time alone. Come with me, and I'll show you your new little niece."

The three walk out while Carla and Ana rock back and forth sobbing on one another's shoulder. "What are you sorry for sweetie?"

"For everything. For all the pain I've caused you, for not calling and telling you about the baby or that I left, why I left, where I went to… for marrying Christian."

Carla lets go of Ana and balks at her confession. "You have nothing to be sorry about and I know that last statement is not true!"

"Why shouldn't I be? I'm sure you've been brought up to date about the situation already, haven't you Mom?"

"Yes, Grace told me everything." She smiles and takes a fresh tissue to dab away a few remaining tears from her daughter's red blotchy eyes and stained cheeks. "At least Christian is remorseful for his sin. Many men are not. My third husband wasn't."

"Stephen cheated on you?"

"Honey, I found out too late that not only did he cheat on me but on all four of his other ex wives as well. That's why we're exs. But he wasn't sorry for doing it. It was like 'so what?'" That's why our marriage only lasted five months. Plus he was abusive at times. Has Christian ever been abusive?"

Ana thought hard about that question since she doubted her mom knew about Christian's past lifestyle. After all, she liked and enjoyed the kinkyfuckery. "No."

"Then you should definitely give him a second chance. I know he still loves you very much and that you love him or else you wouldn't be crying over the man like you are! Question: did you see him at all yesterday when you woke up?"

"Yes, once. I was mean to him too. Treated him like disgusting dog-crap which I felt under the circumstances, was duly justified. I told him to get out! Go away, leave me alone that I didn't want to talk to him. He must have gotten the message because I haven't seen him since. Not that I'm ready or actually want to."

"Now stop that Anastasia Rose Grey! Admit it, you do want to see him! You only said those things to hurt him because you're hurting. You need to talk to him honey, you need to discuss those issues out and make your marriage work again!" says Carla in earnest willing her daughter to heed her sage advice. She suddenly pauses and grimaces, feeling like a hypocrite. "Oh, hell, what am I thinking? Who am I to be giving you advice on marriage? Why look at me, I'm on husband number four! One of my biggest regrets in life was divorcing Ray. He's a good man. He was good to me, he's good to you and if I could do it all over again I wouldn't have. I'd hate to see you follow in my footsteps. Okay, I think it's time to change the subject. I heard you died and they brought you back. Tell me, out of curiosity, what was it like, death?"

"Weird, strange. Oh my God, Mom, the spookiest thing happened. I met Frank. I met my birthfather! Man, he was really a hunk!"

Her mother sits wide-eyed and gasps, "You did? Oh, yes, he certainly was! And very charming! It was love at first sight for me, for us. We adored each other much like you and Christian. I mourned his death terribly for years. You remind me an awful lot of him especially in the eyes. You have your father's beautiful blue eyes."

"And your feistiness. At least that's what he told me. Speaking of fathers, is Ray here?"

"I don't know, sweetie. I do know the next time he sees Christian won't be a pretty sight!"

"I know." cringes Ana, "I shouldn't but I can't help but feel sorry for Christian. Ray's gonna beat him to a pulp until he's black and blue."

"If he doesn't take a hunting rifle and shoot him first."

"Yeah," snorts Ana, "That's another option! Tell me, how did you, Kate and Mia get here?"

"I flew in to Seattle from Georgia last night and we took the GEH jet here this morning."

"But I thought the jet was already here at the airport with Christian."

"He had to fly back last night. There was a crisis at work that needed his attention. So he let us use the plane. Said he'd fly the helicopter out when he was finished."

Strange, but the news of Christian's absence has a bazaar effect on Ana as if a part of her is missing.

And it's quite noticeable by Carla who says nothing; just sits there grinning like a Cheshire cat.

A flurry of oohs and ahs comes walking into the hospital room. An excited Mia rushes over to Ana, "Oh my God Ana, she's darling! The cutest little thing I've ever seen! So very petite and tiny just like a little baby doll!"

Kate rolls her eyes at Mia's comparison. "She is beautiful Steele. You did a great job. The NICU nurse says she's greatly improved and her lungs are getting much stronger."

It's Carla's cue to leave the three girls to visit and gab about. "I think it's time I take a look at our granddaughter huh Grace?" And the two quickly sped off out of the room and down the hall.

"So, tell me," prods Mia, "Got any baby names picked out?"

"_Phoebe"_

The lilt of Ella's voice springs into Ana's mind, "Yes. Phoebe."

"Ah, Phoebe Katherine Grey. Sounds great huh?"

A pout appears on Mia's face. "Phoebe Mia sounds better."

"It's going to be Phoebe Grace. But don't tell my mother!"

"So, Steele, now that you've been discovered, any designs of returning?"

"I doubt it. This is my new life now and I love it. I got a job and friends, a beautiful home. And freedom! I don't ha…"

A soft knock on the door halt's Ana's response. "Hi Ana. Is this a bad time to visit?"

Both Kate and Mia are at awe of this gorgeous man in the doorway. "No, no. Come in. I'd like you to meet a couple of friends of mine." Greg walks in carrying a small giftbag in his hand. "Greg, these are my friends from Seattle. Kate Kavanagh and Mia Grey. She's Christian's younger sister. This is…"

"Gregsen Christianson." Replies a mesmerized Kate. "I see your name in the papers quite a bit."

"I hope you're talking about the good articles and not the bad which carry no validity whatsoever. And please, call me Greg."

His dazzling smile, showing off perfectly white teeth, and warm handshake leaves Kate breathless…and jealous. What is it about Ana that the most handsome, charming, eligible west-coast billionaire bachelors can't resist? "So Greg, how do you know Ana?"

"I'm her best friend Trudy's cousin. Oh, Ana just so you'll know, Teddy's over at her house playing with the other three rug-rats. And she sent these over for you."

Ana takes the bag from his hand and her suspicions immediately quell. The contents are still warm and smell out-of-this-world. "Trudy made me Chocolate-chip cookies?" she exclaims, "Be sure and give her a great big thank you from me!"

"I will make sure and do that." Greg slips his hands into his jean pockets and nervously fidgets. Feeling awkward visiting Ana at the same time as Kate and Mia he decides to say his adieus. "Well," he says clearing his throat, "I should get going. Just came by to see how you were doing, play messenger and delivery boy. Ladies, it's been a pleasure meeting you. Ana, I'll be sure and check in on you later. Bye."

He turns and leaves, all eyes stare at his cute tight ass as he walks toward and exits the door. When clearly out of her view, Mia sighs, "I want one! I want a sexy god just like him!"

"Ditto for me! How do you do it, Steele? What is it about you that the charming, good-looking, single 'moneybags' kind of man find so utterly attractive? Haven't you ever heard of sharing with those of us who aren't fortunate enough to possess such an amazing aura?"

A light pinkish hue adorns Ana's cheeks. " Hey, aren't you guys forgetting about your husband and fiancée? And Greg's just being a concerned friend is all. He, Trudy and Sawyer have been very supportive of me through this pregnancy. I honestly don't know what I would have done without them."

An evil smirk appears on Kate's face. "Mia would you like a peach smoothie? I know I could use one and I bet Ana would like one too, right?" Ana nods aware of Kate's plan for a bit of privacy without hurting their sister-in-law's feelings. Once Mia leaves to abide the request, Kate turns her attention to her bedridden friend, "You know what? From what I've seen of him I bet that Greg is an awesome lay. And he is so into you it's not funny! You've got to get him in between the sheets Ana, you've got to do it, you've got to do the big nasty with him!"

Kate's ever-present directness stuns Ana speechless. How can she suggest such a thing! "Are you nuts? What would possess you say a thing like that? And what makes you think I'd even consider it?"

"Oh please, Steele, the guy screams sex. I bet he rivals Christian and Elliott something awful. Tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind before."

She gulps, aware her silence has just revealed one of her hidden desires. "Once. Twice. Alright, I admit it! Several times! But I was horny and pregnant then. I would have humped a streetlamp."

"Well, you're not pregnant any longer and he's not a streetlamp. And from the way you two looked at each other, if he asks you'd be more than willing to comply."

"Stop it Kate and no I wouldn't!"

"Bullshit! What's wrong? You afraid Christian's going to find out? Well, here's hoping he does. Consider it payback Ana. Give the bastard a taste of his own medicine. Let him know what it feels like to be cheated on!"

Ana sits up, petrified from her friend's manic behavior. " Kate, what you're suggesting is nothing more then revenge sex! I refuse to stoop that low. Anyway, Greg's too nice a person to be used like that."

"Fine, whatever but you're missing out on a great opportunity."

Fate is truly on Ana's side. As if on cue in dances Mia carrying three frosty cups full of sweet liquid libation. "Smoothies anyone?" She passes them out and as naïve as a lamb asks what they'd been talking about. When Kate caught her up on the discussion she answered, "Oh, the GILF."

"Excuse me?" came two wondrous voices in unison.

"Yeah, that's right." she said, taking a sip from her smoothie, " The GILF. You know, a Guy I'd Love to Fuck me!"

The three can't help but click their cups together so they could make a toast, "Here, here! To Greg the GILF! We couldn't have said it better!"

As loud as the cheers and laughter are inside the room the snickers coming from outside are just as hard to keep contain. Carla, Grace and Carol stand by the doorway listening in on the girls' conversation. "Is this Greg fellow really that much of a hot stud?" whispers Carla.

A bright pink hue rushes to the cheeks of an embarrassed Grace and Carol before coyly answering the question together, "Oh yes Carla," they sigh, "You have no idea!"

With the strength and conviction of a drill sergeant Ana's mom brings the hilarity to a halt. "Hey, come on you guys we've got to go. Time to check in at the hotel. Plus Ana won't get any rest if we clowns are here visiting with her twenty-four seven."

Kate and Mia wait to respond until the last little drop of their drink has been slurped. They roll their eyes in an annoying fashion, say their adios' with promises to return in the morning. Carla comes to the side of the hospital bed, brushes a few strands of hair away from her daughter's face and gives her a gentle kiss on the forehead. "Take care my darling. I'm so thankful to still have you in my life."

"I am too, Mama. Oh, I'll tell Luke to bring Teddy over tomorrow. He's grown up so much since the last time you've seen him. And he'll adore seeing you and his auntie Kate and Mia."

"Looking forward it! Now please darling, try and get some rest, okay?"

…

10:30 at night. The hospital is calm and still. Ana's relaxed, enjoying the romance novel she reading and the chocolate-chip cookie she's munching on. Soon her eyes grow heavy and staying awake is no longer possible. She yawns heavily, puts down the book, turns over onto her side and pulls the blanket over her comfortable repose. The second her head hits the pillow she falls into a deep, restful sleep. Her dream that night puts a smile on her face and she softly moans in pure contentment. The dream is very different than the ones she's been having lately and in the morning, Ana will awaken to discover it has had a surprising effect on her.

Sometime during the night while she's sleeping so soundly a visitor quietly tiptoes into her room. The person is someone who adores and cares deeply for this peaceful angel and would like nothing more than to leave her with a gentle kiss goodnight.

"Sleep well my sweet Ana. You don't know how much I love you."

**AA/N: So, what kind of dream did Ana have that made her so god damn happy? And just who was the late night visitor? Any guesses? Let me know what you think. **


	18. Chapter 18

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 18

Not what it seems

**A/N: I know you've waited a long time for this update but here it finally is. And I'm very sorry for the delay. So here is chapter 18…at last!**

After a long, hard day toiling away at the office, succeeding at turning a sour deal into one of peaches and cream Christian is ecstatic to finally be on his way home to Escala. The meeting went way longer than expected. Even Ros was ready to tear someone's hair, fingernails and other precious parts of the male anatomy out due of the extended length. But after a few (maybe too many) drinks the merger was at last settled and everything is now copasetic.

Taylor watches with grave concern as his weary (and part tipsy) employer slides into the backseat of the black Audi SUV and starts unloosening his tie. "Uh, Boss, you look exhausted!"

His statement garners no argument from Christian.

Jason has an important matter on his mind and one he feels he must enforce even thou there's a chance it'll piss Christian off and ruin the evening plans. He waits until they've arrived home and headed up in the elevator before stressing his demands. "Sir, as your bodyguard and head security officer I must inform you that in all clear conscience I cannot allow you to fly the helicopter to California tonight."

"The hell you are! I have to get back to Ana and Teddy."

"That's all well and good but you're not doing it tonight. Number one, you're too tired and need sleep. Second you've been drinking automatically grounding you. If you choose to disregard these orders I have no use but to report you to air traffic control as a risk."

Christian reviews his options. There was only one: to reluctantly accept Jason's terms. Because deep down he knew his trusting friend was right. "Fine! But can I get some fucking coffee?"

"Coming right up Boss." Jason strolls into the kitchen to prepare them a pot (Yeah, he can do things like that without Gail's help!) while Christian flops down on the living room couch. He begins to mumble in a soft voice: "I'm sorry I'm not there for you Ana. Looks like I'm a fucking disappointment again."

…..

Greg walks into his lush two-story mansion and is immediately welcomed with a phone message.

_Beep. Gregsen, this is your father. Just checking to see if you're still coming to the family reunion dinner tonight. I hope so. It would make your mother and us all very happy. Let me know or just show up if you are. It's at six o'clock here at the house. Hope to see you here._

Holy crap! He forgot about it. He puts a call into Trudy and yes she and her husband will be attending too. That settles it. Looks like he stuck appearing at the long boring get-together or risk looking like a rotten son to all. His plan to return to the hospital tonight has been thwarted. By the time it's over so will visiting hours will be too. Looks like he won't be going back tonight.

….

Luke stands outside Ana's room and hears his cell-phone ring the theme from Star Wars. He pulls it from his pants pocket and answers, "Luke here. Oh, hello. Yes, yes. Sure no problem. I'll be happy to. What time? Five-thirty. Okay. I'll come get them then. No, don't worry it'll be a sleepover. You can get them in the morning. Yeah, reunions can be a bummer. But you and your husband try and have fun anyway. Bye, bye Trudy." Looks as if Luke won't be going back to the hospital either.

…

**At the hospital - Ana **

"_Oh yeah baby." "Come for me, Ana." "You are so…" Oh, oh, oh, Ana!" "Such beautiful skin. So soft." "You're always ready." "You are so beautiful." "I've wanted you for a long time." You. Are. Mine."_

_Oh, my god! I've never had sex so good before! The way he sucks on my nipples; tickles my swollen clit with his tongue; the feel of his silky kisses upon my bare skin. The way he brings me to orgasm not once, twice, but over and over again. I crash and then crash again. His thrusts are slow and gentle at first then hard, fast, deep, never ending. He's a powerhouse. Oh yes! Take me! Take me! You're a god, a fucking god! My hands clench his shoulders; my fingernails rip into his back; I know I draw blood, blood mixed with sweat. I stiffen and shiver; I scream out; explode over what, twenty-five times so far. The longing. The desire. The rapture. He is wonderful! This dream is wonderful. I want him! Oh do I want him in me always. But who is this fantastic lover?_

I open my eyes to find my mother's smiling face. I smile back…almost._ Oh_ _shit! Look what I've done!_ Oh my god, I haven't had one of these of ages. This has got to be the highest form of humiliation! Mom's looking at me very concerned and starts asking what's wrong. How can I tell her what I did? _Just do it Ana!_ So I swallow my pride and what does she do? She tries not to laugh. Great. _It's not funny Mom!_ And now she wants to know about my dream too! Uh uh! No way! That's way too personal. I'm not… Okay, okay! But I'm not going into details!

Stop salivating Mom will you? Your daughter feels like a phantasmagorical slut! And I know you mean well but quit acting like a psychiatrist. _Will you stop being in denial Ana? What your mother says is true and_ _you know it!_ Hey, I am not being stubborn! It's just I can't, I won't! I don't care! I'm not ready! Christian's a pig! A controlling, unreasonable, cheating, no good, adulterer who breaks wedding vows! And I doubt he's changed. You know how much he broke my heart… Mom! How could you say such a thing! I don't want… I may never… _Ah shit, just admit it to yourself Ana. You still_ _love the bastard!_

Fine, okay, you win. I'll talk to him. But not right now. Not until me, and my baby girl are out of the hospital. But first get me out of this fucking wet bed and gown! I want to see my daughter just liked you promised.

What? You're kidding me! Daddy's here in the hospital? When did he get here? Oh crap! This means Christian's gonna get clobbered when daddy discovers the truth! But hey, I don't give a shit!_ Oh yes you do! You care about him with all your heart. He's more than just Teddy and Phoebe's father to you, he's_ …

Yes, I know I do. And that's why I'm so scared.

…

**At the hospital – Everyone else **

Bright and early the next morning Grace strides into Ana's room surprised to come upon Ray sitting in a chair watching his daughter still asleep. She motions him over towards the door as not to disturb peaceful 'Sleeping Beauty'. "When did you get here?" she whispers.

"About an hour ago. Took a taxi from the airport. Grace, why is she in California and not Seattle?"

She stiffens, realizing, _Oh, that's right! He hasn't been told the complete story_ _yet._ And fearing for her son's life after he does! "Believe me Ray, it's a long story. May I buy you a cup of coffee and a bite of breakfast so we can talk? Oh, and by the way, have you seen your new baby granddaughter yet? Carla's in with her right now."

"What? I have a granddaughter?"

_Oh Lord he really is in the dark!_ "Yes, and she's just beautiful. Come with me. Let me take you to the NICU and I'll show you."

A short while after Ray and Grace leave, Carla ambles into the room to quietly check up on her daughter. She's just in time too to watch Ana begin to stir and wake up. She smiles as Ana opens her eyes. "Good morning sleepyhead!"

_What a great way to start the morning. Not every day I wake up to see my mother's cheery face._ Ana smiles back and begins to reply but scowls at the uncomfortable feeling between her legs instead. _Oh shit no!_

"Ana, what's wrong honey?"

"Mom," she winces in disgust, "I think I had a wet dream!"

Her mother tries to stifle a giggle. "Oh? Care to share?"

Flushed cheeks prove one hundred percent the embarrassment Ana feels. Her left hand covers her eyes, "It's too humiliating but here goes. I was lying in bed having sex. It was great sex too. Hot, super intense! I must've had over twenty orgasms! It's just, that I have no idea who the sex was with! I couldn't see his face. It was too dark! It could have been Christian, or…"

"Or Greg, or Luke or Jason or that cute Dr. Quincy or…"

" Mom, please stop, okay! I said I don't know! But I wish I did!"

"Oh Ana, Ana, Ana. It doesn't matter who it was. What matters is who you want it to be!"

Her breathing hitches; she feels completely gobsmacked. There was only one man that came to mind. But did she really want it to be him?

Carla puts her hand on top of Ana's, "Look darling, you can fool yourself and everyone else but you cannot fool your heart. You know exactly who that man is, don't you?"

Ana lowers her head and barely whispers, "Yes."

"Then why are you continuing to be so stubborn? Talk to the man! And the sooner the better! Get your issues out in the open, clear the air and start over if you must. That 'wet dream' of yours only proves it's been way too long and you crave nothing more than to feel his cock, and no one else's inside you again! Now, lets call a nurse and get you out of that wet bed and into a dry gown before it's time for your breakfast. Then, I'm going to take you to see your little girl. Got it?"

"Fine, I'll make the effort. But not until Phoebe and I are both out of here."

"Phoebe? Is that what you're naming your precious little gem? Ana, I think that's a very appropriate name. Did you know it's Greek for bright, shining one? Well, there's no denying she certainly is that!"

"Here we go Mrs. Grey." calls out the friendly Rhiana look-alike dressed in pastel green scrubs now entering the room. "Lets get you out of this wet bed so we can change those linens." Carla lets out a sigh of relief upon seeing the young, black Amazonian nurse come to help lift Ana, who naturally is in quite a bit of pain, up and onto the cold linoleum floor, a feat she knew she'd be unable to accomplish alone. With their arms securely wrapped around a wincing Ana, the three slowly shuffle toward the small bathroom. "There. I'll go get you a clean hospital gown while you Mrs. Grey, get washed up. Then I'll get to work changing that bed for you. Oh by the way, hi, my name is Avalon. "

By the time Ana, now clean and refreshed and wearing that unfashionable hospital gown, and Carla exited the bathroom the bed had new linen, breakfast was waiting and so was Avalon to once more assist the lovely new mother up in her bed which Ana and Carla were most grateful. "If there's anything else you need Mrs. Grey, just ask for me." the studious 'Angel of Mercy' requested.

Both Ana and Carla smiled and said thanks. One of them scowled and turned her nose up and her breakfast of hot tea, orange juice, oatmeal, fresh fruit and toast. It wasn't the one standing by the side of the finicky patient. Carla tried her best to coach Ana into taking a bite. "You have to eat sweetie. You have to keep up your strength. Here, a few spoonfuls of oatmeal, the fruit and drink the orange juice. Okay?"

Ana rolled her eyes and relented. The food wasn't so bad after all!

Grace and Ray soon return. He's none too happy about the situation and wants to castrate a certain someone. (Yikes!) Though very apparent he tries to hide his anger the best he can from his daughter.

"Daddy!" Ana's face beams like a ray of sunshine upon setting sight of him standing at the foot of the bed.

He walks to her side kisses her on the forehead before encapsulating Ana into a bearhug. "Oh Annie I'm so glad you're safe and alive." He lets go and almost smiles. "How are you feeling? Are you sleeping okay?"

Grace intercedes, "I came in to check on her last night before I went home and she was sleeping like a baby. Must have been having a heck of a dream from the grin she had on her face."

Ana blushes while Carla fights the urge to snicker.

Ray can't help himself; he's kept it in long enough. He leans over and whispers in Ana's ear, "I'm gonna kill the son of a bitch!"

Ana is not surprised and answers, "Get in line."

Just before Kate and Mia bursts into the room Dr. Allen made his entrance with some very good news. "Good morning Mrs. Grey. Looks like you're good enough, you can go home tomorrow."

"What about my baby? Can she come home too?"

"Sorry Mrs. Grey. Due to her size and condition she'll have to remain here a while longer for observation. Say three to four weeks maybe more. It depends on how she progresses."

Ana is crestfallen; tears well up in her eyes; nothing else matters. Not the people surrounding her or breakfast or the gifts in Kate's hand, or the flowers and balloons Mia is holding on to. There's only one thing on her mind… "I've got to see my little girl!"

…

**Meanwhile in Seattle…**

Christian sits at the kitchen counter downing his usual egg white omelet and cup of coffee anxious to get going and fly Charlie Tango back to California and Ana. Though casually dressed for a Monday, he must stop off to GEH first to sign a few important papers that are waiting on his desk. He's not happy about it either; scowls all the way over to the building, through the lobby, in the elevator up to the twentieth floor, pass his assistant Andrea and into to his cold office. He finds the papers and starts to sign but is first interrupted by a buzz from Andrea. "Mr. Grey, You have a visitor."

"I haven't time. Tell whoever it will have to wait."

"But she says it's very important."

Christian rolls his eyes, "Fine. Send her in."

The woman walks into his office and he cringes at the sound of her voice. "Hello Mr. Daddy to be. How are you?"

"What in the hell are you doing here Cassandra!" he says furiously.

"I just stopped by to show you how little Christian is coming along. That's right. We're having a son!" she replies, rubbing her starting-to-show belly.

"That is not my child!" bellows Christian.

"Oh yes it is. Remember? You wanted to have a baby with me, you told me to go off the pill. I showed up for our Friday session one day and you made love to me the whole weekend. Slow, passionate, love instead of hard vanilla sex. It was beautiful. We didn't go into the playroom once, not ever. I remember it well because it's the first time you yelled out my name instead of Ana's when you climaxed. And I've never had orgasms like that before. Christian you are one fantastic lover. And a hell of a Dom too!"

"You are so delusional. I would never tell any sub to do that."

"I know. But I wasn't your sub was I. I was your mistress. You were going to divorce your wife because you wanted to marry me and start a family. You hated her. Called her a fucking shrew. You said she was a mean, angry self- absorbed bitch who ignored you and withheld what you desperately needed: sex, control, love and BDSM. That's why you came to me. I gave you that and more. I kept your appetite fed. You even told me you loved me that day in the shower when you were washing my hair. Then you started sucking on my breasts, bringing me to orgasm with your long slender fingers then pounded the hell out of me from the back until I melted on the shower floor from an extreme orgasm. You followed and we lovers lay while the water fell on us like rain."

Christian is getting madder and madder. "What a crazy, fucking liar you are Cassie. I NEVER said those things and that shower NEVER happened. Only in your mind."

"Of course you're going to say that Christian," she laughs, "Because you're in denial. And once Ana finds out I'm pregnant there's not way to save you're marriage. She'll end up divorcing you so fast…"

"You are a damn lunatic Cassie. And I bet it was you who sent those pictures to Ana."

"They turned out great didn't they? My favorite is the one where you're feeding me your cock. I hope she liked it to."

"Get out of my office you deranged fanatic! I don't know what got into your head but I would never want a child with a nutcase like you!"

"Oh well, my word against yours. We'll find out for sure in January, won't we? Until then I'm off to buy more baby supplies for our little boy."

He's positively fuming. "Taylor! Show this bitch out!"

"That's okay. I know the way. Bye, bye Christian. Laters, Papa."

Cassie strolls out his office, down the elevator, and through the lobby humming a tune of self-satisfaction. Once outside the huge glass doors of GEH, Cassie pulls out her Blackberry and sends a text.

* You're right. He's scared shitless! *

**AA/N: I hope this answered a few questions. Thanks to you all. You're fabulous. **


	19. Chapter 19

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 19

Truth or dare

**A/N: I know it's been a long time since an update and I really apologize. Between the cold and work I've not had much time to write. But here you go. It's kind of a lead in until the next chapter. I hope you like it.**

Christian stands in the middle of his office fuming, his hands at his sides clinched into fists of rage. "Have her followed Taylor. I don't know what her angle is but she's not going to get away with it."

"Right on it Boss." Taylor makes a quick call and the deed is in the works. "All's a go. Ryan's putting the tail on her now."

A grateful nod is all he receives from the boiling mad CEO. Furiously running his fingers through his copper colored hair Christian storms behind his desk, slumps in his chair, covers his face with his hands and vigorously shakes his head back and forth.

As a concerned friend and not a bodyguard Jason poses a question, "Uh have you ever considered that broad just might be carrying _your_ baby?"

The insinuation knocks Christian for a loop. He raises his head and gives Jason a 'Dom' look. "What the hell do you mean?"

"I'm just saying condoms do break. And people can be forgetful. Especially at hotels when they're dead drunk with a quote unquote sub."

"So what you're assuming is there's a good chance it might be mine?"

"Until we can prove otherwise that she's lying and this whole thing is bogus then yeah! As a friend, I'm telling you not to rule out the possibility so quickly. Don't be fooling yourself Christian you know damn well_ if_ she is knocked up you just might be the kid's father."

A deathly silence covers the office as a terrified Christian, his jaw tight as a vice stares blankly ahead. The accusation tears at him like a knife. "No," he finally hisses, "I refuse to believe that." Between fists making contact with his desk he loudly proclaims "That. Baby. Isn't. Mine! Get It!"

Jason nods his head in disgust. _Damn bastard! You should've kept your pecker in_ _your pants where they belonged. Ana ain't ever coming back if you're wrong._

Christian's body softens but only to the slightest degree. His head hangs sorrowfully in regret. "Oh God, it can't be my child, Jason, it just can't be. But if that baby is mine then I've lost Ana for good. There'll be no way in hell she'll forgive me now." With one swift swoop of his arm the items on top of the desk land on the floor. "What a fucking asshole I am! A stupid fucking asshole who let his best reason for living slip through his fucking fingers!"

_Jesus the guy's scared shitless. I gotta do something before he hurts himself._ "Will you calm the fuck down?" yells Jason as he tackles an out-of-control Christian against a wall hoping to slap some sense into the jerk. "Get a grip will ya! Yeah, I agree. You are one fucking asshole. But you're jumpin' the gun here. We don't know shit yet. You want my opinion, I've seen a few pregnant women in my time and I know she's just starting to show but believe me, it ain't a boy. Too low. I've seen my ex with Sophie and Ana with Teddy and well, I think the bitch is full of crap."

A glimmer of hope brings Christian back to earth. "Oh. Really? You think so? Hmp. Good. Thank you."

"Yeah. Look, you're in no shape to fly that chopper and I ain't about to risk my life so I'm calling Dan. That is if you still want to get your sorry ass back to California."

"It's a helicopter! And yes I do."

"Yeah, yeah whatever. Come on then let's go…Boss."

…..

**Meanwhile, in the NICU**

Ray wells up with tears at the sight of his newest grandchild. "She's so tiny. Looks like she'd break if ya held her. And all those tubes. I didn't know they made them that small. And that teeny, tiny mask. How long she have ta wear it? How long she have ta be in that contraption?"

" We're not sure how much longer sir." answers Mindy, the NICU nurse, "That's up to her. She's progressing nicely though."

"Has Ana seen her, Grace?"

"Once. But not for very long. Maybe if she's strong enough Ana can come see her today."

"Has that motherfu… sorry, I mean, the father seen her yet?"

"Yes. Christian has seen her every day. She's his pride and joy."

Ray smolders at the sound of his name. _At least the jackass can do_ _something right!_

To smooth his ire Grace offers him a suggestion. "Why don't we go get Ana. She might be feeling strong enough now and I know she's been dying to see her baby."

"Yeah, good idea. I haven't seen her awake yet, let her know I'm here." An irritated Ray turns to leave along with Grace, "Don't worry Grace I'll put a lock on my temper around her… I hope."

…

Thru the glass doors of the hospital walks a casually dressed, but still, none the less, ready-to-be-bodyguard Sawyer. He's not in a big hurry but not watching where he's going and clumsily bumps into someone. "Oh, God I sorry! Are you alright?"

There is an immediate attraction between these two people. They're thrown off-guard and stare at each other awkwardly. "Oh, y-yeah. I-I'm fine, t-thank you." _God he's handsome!_

"Good. I-I'm glad." _God she's pretty. What do I do now? _"I'm Luke." He stutters like a schoolboy offering his hand. "I-I'm here v-visiting a friend. She's sick." _Nice going fool. Of course Ana's sick or she wouldn't be here._

"Lucky her. Oh, my name is Avalon. Avalon Jenkins. See?" She giggles shyly and points to her nametag. "It's very nice to meet you, Luke." _He's so cute too!_

"Yeah, same here. Oh, and my last name is Sawyer." Poor Luke doesn't know what to do next. His whole world has turned upside down. He's goofy and tongue-tied. "Uh, well… I better get going. I hope we bump, I mean get to see…" _I wonder if she has a boyfriend?_

Avalon flashes him a huge smile showing off her pearly white teeth. "I hope so too." _Gosh he's nice._ "Well, I, uh, I should be getting back to work too. Uh, bye Luke." She turns toward one of the hallways but looks back first to give Luke a deadly wink. _What a hunk! I hope he doesn't have a girlfriend._

That did it! Our smitten fool is hooked. A giddy love-struck Luke is no good to anyone right now…or probably will be for the rest of the day!

…

Five excited souls look on as Ana gets to touch her daughter for the very first time. She takes instruction gladly from Nurse Mindy how to put her hands into the incubator a certain way and to touch, not rub the baby's tender skin. Ana readily obeys; she can feel the joy in her heart explode as she and child finally make the blessed connection. Tears automatically well in her eyes. "Oh my sweet little Phoebe," whispers Ana to her sleeping angel. "Your mommy's here at last." A bigger surprise causes gasps from all when a teeny hand strokes her mother's finger and a wee smile appears in recognition of their bond. _Oh Christian my love look what we made. Isn't she beautiful?_

"You can stay for as long as you'd like Mrs. Grey. It's good for her to have you near. Your husband's here everyday for this dear little one. That's been a tremendous aid in her growth and recovery."

Ana's animosity toward Christian seems to temporarily melt. "He has?"

"Yes. And does she love her daddy!"

"_She knows me Ana! She knows I'm her daddy!"_

_Of course she does,_ Ana stares lovingly at her daughter and her debate mechanism goes into overdrive. She begins to reflect, _he's been with her every day, that's why. Does this mean she feels closer to him than she does with me? I mean, come on, I'm the one who carried her in my womb for the last six months! 'She knows her daddy'. Ha! She doesn't know the real Christian like I do! If she only knew that her daddy is really… Wait. Have I been so blinded by hatred that I can no longer think of him as anything other than a cheater? Don't I want to see the goodness in him anymore?_

_Oh, just admit it Ana, you do. He's good and kind and sweet and caring and the one you're hopelessly in love with but don't have the guts to talk to or want anything to do with because…_

… _I know, I know because I'm too stubborn and unwilling to give him a second chance like Mom told me to do, okay? He's also overbearing and overprotective and a control freak and fifty shades fucked up! Yeah, yeah, yeah I know, I still fell head-over-heels in love with him despite all those faults! But dammit, he broke our wedding vows, which honestly in my book is a pretty darn despicable act so why-should-I-forgive-him!_

_Because, Ana, deep down inside you want to! You want to help that pathetic jackass find his way out of the darkness. You did it once you can do it again. Face it. Christian needs you as much you need him. You want the two of you to work on rebuilding your marriage because there's nobody else in the world you'd rather or even fathom being married to. Look, can't you see he's remorseful and regretful for his crime of infidelity?_

_But how am I going to be able to trust him? How do I know he's not gonna stick his cock where it don't belong again? _

_You don't. You have to give him the benefit of the doubt though. Either that or threaten the weak son-of-a-bitch! Tell him if he dares have another affair or even thinks about fucking some other woman, his impressive dick ain't gonna be so impressive anymore! That's right, say goodbye to Mister Member! Not to mention the Testicle Twins. And then you go slap him with a D-I-V-O-R-C-E! Yeah! That ought to do it! High-five!_

_What? A divorce? No, no, no, no divorce! I don't want a divorce! I don't even want to think about getting one. That's the last thing I'd ever want to consider! Besides, I don't want Teddy and Phoebe going through the agony of having to choose between their mother and their father._

_What DO you want then, Ana? _

_I don't know! I do know I don't want to be a coward like I was when I threw him out of my hospital room because I couldn't find the nerve to face him. _

_Then for God sakes do yourself a favor and talk to the jerk! Get this ugly matter out in the open. Clear the air and start anew! _

_Yeah, I guess that is the best solution. But still, I…_

A soft, soothing voice brings Ana out of her trance. It is Mindy. "Mrs. Grey, are you alright?"

"Huh?" answers a shaken Ana, "Uh, yes, I'm fine. Thank you. Why?"

"Uh, because you looked so distant, so far away. Like you were somewhere else. I was starting to worry. You've been like that for quite awhile."

"Oh. How long?"

"Almost an hour."

"You're kidding. I guess it's time I left then." Ana gingerly removes her hands from the incubator/baby bedchamber. "I can't wait to take her home and hold her in my arms."

Mindy giggled, "That's a perfectly normal request Mrs. Grey. We hear it all time from the parents."

With Mindy's help, Ana rose up from the chair and groaned from pain before sitting back in her wheelchair ready to make her departure. Her 'audience' has diminished by three leaving the two grandmothers behind. They're gabbing between the two of them and beam when Ana exits. Carla, just out of motherly instinct, immediately gets behind the chair and starts pushing her daughter down the hospital's wide corridor. Her motherly action aggravates Ana but she doesn't resist; just grimaces like a stubborn child all the way back to her room.

After being helped into bed and made comfortable Ana looks at Grace and Carla and makes a requests that not only floors them but pleases them no end. "Can I ask the two of you a favor? When you see Christian, tell him I'd like to see him, okay?"

…

Two hours later and trying his best to throw this horrible episode with Cassie over his shoulder, a tense Christian and Taylor arrive at the hospital. As if scripted his presence alone grabs the attention of every female in the room. He's still got it; he makes them swoon. Fortunately, he was able to miss the 'wrath of Ray Steele'. _"I'll kill the bastard!"_ First off he notices his mom. She smiles and relays the message that gives him the first smile he's had on his face all day…but petrifies him just the same. He nods and rushes like his levis were on fire toward Ana's room.

He stills at the door, swallows hard and timidly peeks his head in. His heart races as if on a treadmill. "You wanted to see me, Ana?"

She's just as nervous but refuses to let it show. _I am in control, I am_ _in control, I am in con…_ "Yes. Come on in Christian. Don't worry, I'm not going to bite."_ I hope._

Christian responds like a teenager on a first date. Taking a deep breath he cautiously enters and stands by the foot of the bed instantly beguiled by the sight of his beloved. _Get a grip man!_ But this internally trembling puppydog can only manage a weak "Hi."

Not surprising that Ana too becomes charmed by his beauty. _Hold strong!_ _Do not succumb to him! _So much so she can only respond with a weak "Hi." _Come on, come on, keep it together girl!_

"How are you feeling?" he asks anxiously.

"Better, much better. Thank you." _Get to the point!_ "Look, before we can even begin to try and fix our marriage, Christian, we have to have a talk. We have to bring out into the open and discuss this whole entire mess. There's no use moving forward until we do. Agree?"

"Absolutely, Baby."

Ana cringes at the reference. "I prefer you not call me that. Not yet anyway."

A stunned Christian mouths a silent "Oh."

"But not here and not now. I don't want to discuss our future until I'm feeling better, and Phoebe's out of the hospital. That won't be for a few weeks though."

Christian tilts his head in wonderment. "Who's Phoebe?"

"Our daughter. Phoebe Grace. That's her name."

Though disappointed he wasn't included in the naming of their child he sighs, "Pretty name."

Ana simply nods in regards to his approval. "So is that plan good for you?"

_Not really! I don't want to wait god dammit! I want to get this off my chest now. I want to be able to sleep at night._ "Uh, perfect. Where?"

"I haven't decided that yet. I do know we'll need a mediator. I'm sure you've been discussing this with John so since he's familiar with all this shit he would be the perfect choice. Because of the circumstances I'm sure he'll be happy to oblige."

"I agree ba…" He stops himself from saying the force-of-habit word that will put a frown on her face. "Just tell me where and when."

"I will. I'll be sure and call you to let you know. Well, that's all."

Christian feels crushed… and subduedly pissed. "That's all? That's all you wanted to talk to me about?"

_No it's not… baby. I want…_ She feels herself crumbling so Ana forces to keep her guard up. "Yes. That's everything."

"Well then, I-I guess I'll be going." A forlorn Christian slowly turns to walk away hoping she'll stop and reconsider. But Ana doesn't. He leaves with a hard lump in his throat and a feeling of rejection.

Ana watches him trod off with tears welling in her eyes. She rolls on her side and cries into her pillow._ Are you proud of yourself you bitch? Did you have to treat_ _him like dogshit again? You haven't change at all. You're still the same coward like you were before._

Taylor waits in the corridor chatting with Sawyer and sees his woeful boss exit his wife's room. He rushes to his side, "How did it go Boss?"

"Not good." replies Christian, "Not at all like I hoped. She wants to have a talk with me soon. About everything."

"I see. When?"

"Let's just say, in a few weeks my world might comes to an end."

**AA/N: Next chapter, expect fireworks. I hope to get it done in a few days so bear with me. To all you readers, reviewers and fans: I think you guys are awesome for loving and sticking with the story. **


	20. Chapter 20

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 20

Fireworks

**A/N: I'm sorry this update is so late. This chapter is a long one I know and was difficult for me to write. I just hope it makes sense, isn't confusing and answers a few questions. **

**Three weeks later**

A beautiful Saturday morning finds Ana, sitting at home in a rocking chair holding her tiny angel close to her heart and humming a sweet little tune. It seemed like forever until she was allowed to hold baby Phoebe and now she never wants to let her go. Teddy adores being a big brother; is very attentive; calls her his 'Fweebie girl'. Ana herself feels completely healed, walks every day on the beach; loves the cool salty air against her skin, the relaxing sound of gulls and the waves crashing and rippling to shore. She's feeling well enough even to work at the flower shop one or two times a week while Mrs. Nelson the babysitter (and Luke's aunt) watches over the kids. Yes, Ana's life is back to being peaceful and serene.

But the pleasant repose of the house is bound to change; Ana's calm mood will give way to nervous anxiety. This afternoon will be one of revelation for all parties concerned. Will their lives move forward into reconciliation or fall backward into obscurity. Only time will solve that mystery and the time is very near. In a few hours Christian and Dr. John Flynn are due to arrive for a meeting of utmost importance. Let the games begin.

…

The house is empty except for Ana and Sawyer. Teddy and Phoebe are staying with Mrs. Nelson at her place not far away. Every few minutes Ana is either smoothing her white leggings, straightening out her light floral print blouse, checking her makeup, brushing her hair or all of the above out of pure anticipation. Sawyer comes walking toward the pacing bundle of hand wringing nerves. "Ana, they're here."

Her breath hitches; she tries to control her inner trembling._ Get it together Ana and keep it together!_ She so wants to make a good impression. _See, I'm_ _doing fine without you Christian…kind of._ Men's voices fill the foyer and it's time she plays the gracious hostess. Gulp!

Luke welcomes Christian, John and Taylor at the front door and shows them inside. All three gentlemen and are indeed awed by the comfortable warm ambiance not to mention one fantastic view. This may not be the Escala or the Sound but it is pretty darn impressive… even more so.

And then, time stands still; no one else in the room matters; two hearts beat rapidly when aqua blue orbs catch sight of smoky gray and an undeniable longing burns within. From them both came a silent plea:

"_If only we could relive the past, mend what we broke, righted what we wronged so this day would never have happened." _

"Ana, I must say you've quite a lovely home."

Flynn's praise breaks her trance and the hostess takes over, "Oh, thank you John. We like it." Should she dare say the glory goes to Luke? That out of the goodness of his heart she, Teddy and Phoebe have a place to reside? Or should she keep up the charade and protect his secret? Luke must have read her mind. He gives a slight nod of his head and the charade lives on. More accolades follow from a casually dressed Taylor and Christian (his is the one she cherishes the most). "May I get anyone some ice tea?"

Is this plain courtesy on her part or a pausing mechanism?

A unanimous "Yes" rings free and drinks are on the house. Ana passes out large frosty glasses filled with cubes and liquid refreshment for all to enjoy. Jason and Luke take their leave probably to play cards, read, watch TV, etc. Anything to pass the time while the 'inquisition' is in session.

Heaven help us all.

…

An awkward silence ensues as Ana takes her seat on the brown denim couch facing opposite of Christian. She didn't look at him; she couldn't. _Why not?_ _You're not his Goddamn submissive, you never were._ Her eyes focus in John's direction only. Ditto for Christian. He centers on the wise, gentle soul sitting in the chair between them. John begins the discussion: it's the only way to break the tenaciousness. "Why don't we begin by disclosing feelings pertaining to the decline of your marriage? Ana, would you start?"

_No! I don't want to start! Not with that topic. I want to scream "WHY?" to the top of the rafters. I want some answers!_ Ana gives a reluctant, "Sure." She sits up straight, breathes deep and clears her throat, "Well, I've had a lot of time to think our situation over and my opinion is we started ignoring each other. We got so caught up in our work and raising Teddy that we never allowed time to be together. There was no communication. Screaming, yelling and fighting are not communicating. And that's all we seemed to end up doing. We grew farther and farther apart. We had very little intimacy. Sex was for the most part nonexistent. There just wasn't that magic spark anymore. I blame myself for not recognizing the signs earlier, for being oblivious that our marriage was in trouble. If only I hadn't been so blind maybe this mess could have been avoided. I'm the first to admit I'm guilty of the crimes of ignorance and denial. But unfortunately, too little too late."

Christian tries his best to shows little emotion; just sits nervously chewing on the inside of his cheek.

"Christian, how about you? What are your feelings?"

"The same as Ana's. I agree with everything she said. All of it's true. Every word. What she failed to mention was her jackass of a husband is guilty of those crimes as well not to mention being inconsiderate, selfish, jealous, self-centered. You name it. I'm at fault. Look Ana, I'm sorry. I should have come straight to you when I first sensed there was tension in our marriage but I foolishly chose to dismiss it. And for the life of me I don't know why."

Ana feels leery of his acknowledgements. Are they for Flynn's benefit or is he really sincere? "You're being quite the martyr today, Christian, aren't you?"

"No Ana. For once I'm being realistic."

Flynn clears his throat, "Okay, now that's out of the way. Ana, I know you have many question for Christian. Go ahead and address them."

Christian stiffens for he knows exactly what those questions will be. _Must I_ _answer honestly? I don't want to hurt her any more than I already have. But if I don't I'll never regain her trust._

"Okay. Christian, for God sakes why?! Why did you have the affair? Was Elena right? Wasn't I enough for you after all? Were you bored, finished with me? Is that why you went and picked up some slut whore? Please, I think I deserve an honest answer."

This will be hard. Very hard. No matter what he says it will be painful. He closes his eyes, grits his teeth and hopes for the best. "It's not what you think. I didn't go looking for it. I didn't mean for it to happen. Things were going bad at the office. We had lost several large contracts and deals were going awry left and right. It felt disheartening for me to find out the control I yielded over each one had slipped through my fingers. As a result I'd come home depressed only to find the same thing was happening at home. What I fought so hard to hold on to was what I was losing the most of. Control. Not only GEH but of my family and of you and of myself. I was a mess. Things for me were falling apart and my stupid ego kept me from burdening my problems with anyone, even John."

"Oh Christian, why didn't you tell me all this?"

"As you pointed out before we were not communicating. We barely said two words to each other without it turning into a fighting match. So I kept all my headaches bottled inside and dealt with them on my own. Not the smartest of ways to handle the situation."

"What did you do?"

"I'm sure you already know, Ana. You probably smelled the liquor on my breath when I'd returned home. I drank. I'd go to my favorite bar after work and down a few glasses of Scotch. It was an escape. I didn't want to feel anything but numb. I wanted to forget all my troubles, make everything and everybody go away."

Memories of him coming home in that disgusting condition come flooding through Ana's mind, and how horribly she had treated him. If only she had known the pain he was suffering it might have made a difference. She steadies herself for the hardest revelations to come. "Is that where you met her?"

He hangs his head in shame, "Yes. One night I was sitting at the bar drowning my sorrows when this woman came and sat on the stool next to me. I was annoyed at her at first for invading my space. I turned to tell her so but all I saw was you. My Ana. My brown hair, blue- eyed angel was by my side and that made it okay. I ignored her introduction. It didn't matter her name. All that did was that she looked like you. I returned to the bar two nights later and she sat next to me again but this time I wasn't as drunk. The only reason I didn't ask her to leave was because she looked so much like you. She introduced herself again, this time I caught her name: Cassandra."

Ana scowls. Just the sound of the slut-whores name sends prickles up and down her skin.

"At first all we did was talk. She would listen as the tons of workday shit lifted off my shoulders and I'd relax. In my half tipsy state of mind, you were the one I was talking to, not her. We got into a conversation one time about our interests. Knocked the shit out of me when she mentioned one of hers was in BDSM. Had a real serious curiosity about it too. Wanted to pursue the lifestyle. I played dumb. Tried to dissuade her from going in that direction. Told her it didn't sound like something she should get mixed up in. Then she told me there's something about my character that would make a bitchin' Dom. _Oh if she only knew!_ I laughed, told her nothing could be farther from the truth and called it a night. Couldn't get out of that bar fast enough and into the SUV.

These are new admissions that surprises Dr. Flynn. He looks curiously at Christian who sits nervously rubbing his forehead. "What's the matter Christian?"

"Oh, I know this sounds silly but that remark of Cassie's sparked a feeling in me I thought had long gone away. But fuck, I was wrong."

"And what was that?"

He looks sheepishly at Flynn and Ana embarrassed to make his confession. "A strong yearning to satisfy those old BDSM needs, the ones I positively thought I'd buried six-feet under. I ignored the craving under the mislead guise it would disappear like before but no such luck. The urge only got worse. It began to taunt me. I'd have this recurring nightmare where I'd be giving myself an interview. I'd ask, "What's lacking in your life now that you used to have?" And I'd answer, "Control. I need to feel in control and when I'm not it's the fucking shits." Then I asked if I'd "love to have some in your grasp again?" And I answered, "Yes, of course!" The third and last question was one I'm ashamed of the answer because it's true. "When did you feel you had the most control?" "When I was in the playroom with a sub."

With a myriad of emotions at foot Ana stutters, "B-but Christian, that-that was part…"

"Yes I know. Part of my darkness before you, Ana helped me see the light, weaned me away from my dependency for that dark lifestyle and made me face my demons for which I'm eternally grateful. So why would I want to go back? Drove me fucking crazy."

Flynn strokes his chin. "Interesting. You've never mentioned this before. Why not?"

"I don't know, some things, disturbing things you want to keep to yourself. You don't want to share them with anyone until you have to. Like now."

"What are your feelings regarding this Ana?"

"I-I don't know. There's so many. Mostly anger, with myself for being so oblivious to what was happening with him and in our lives. And upset because he felt he couldn't tell me."

"Maybe he wanted to but like you mentioned before the communication between the two of you was nil." He motions for Christian to continue.

He takes a deep breath. "One night I arrived at the bar later than normal but just as depressed and looking forward to my whiskey and chat with Cassandra. I looked around and found her standing at the bar talking with the bartender. From my viewpoint, she seemed practically drunk. I went over anyway and ordered my usual scotch. She saw me and smiled. I almost dropped my glass when out of nowhere she propositioned me. I was never so irritated in my life. She'd never shown any interest before plus she knew I was a married man."

"That bitch!" Ana curses, "But why are you so shocked over that Christian? Women want to come on to you all the time. And stop being so naïve. She's a young, pretty slut-whore of a woman who was no doubt on the prowl. And you were her target. I'm just surprised it took her that long."

Christian feels like an embarrassed puppy just been caught peeing on the kitchen floor because like always, Ana is right. He clears his throat and reluctantly goes on. "Among other 'physical actions' she had a desire to be dominated. Wanted to know what it felt like to be submissive. And wanted me to show her! I was stunned and insulted but at the same time, and I'm ashamed to admit it, flattered. I hadn't mentioned my past life to her, not even once so I asked her why me? She answered, because in her mind I looked like the dominating type.

"I couldn't believe what she said to me. Naturally I declined her offer, finished my drink and got the hell out of there. I ran to the SUV and sat in the backseat dumbfounded at what had occurred. Then I felt that urge return. This time the desire had intensified. I found my resistance weakening and began considering the options: 'Here's my chance. She wants to be dominated and I wanted to feel in control again'. Foolish me came to a decision, one I wish I'd never made. The feeling took me over like I was possessed. Nothing was going to stop me from getting out of the car and walking back into the bar. Even Taylor tried to stop me from couldn't. Now I wish he had. I went over to Cassandra and told her if she wanted to know what it feels like to be a submissive then I'd show her. I'd told her to meet me there in front of the bar the next day after work and by God she better be sober or the deals off. I've never regretted anything more in my life."

He glanced over at two perplexed faces one silent and one in a state of perpetual shock. "Oh my God I don't believe it," Ana mumbled, "Sounds to me like I wasn't enough for you after all!"

Flynn speaks up to give her his professional opinion, "No Ana, I don't think that's what he means at all."

"Ana, I was her teacher. She wanted to learn submission so I taught her. She was a quick learner and damn good at it. And I won't lie to you it felt great to have that control back. It was euphoric, like a drug. I didn't want to lose that feeling so I hired Cassie as my submissive so I wouldn't have to. It felt wonderful to be the Master of the Universe again."

She shudders at his choice of words. "You mean it felt wonderful to be the Dominant again! John, it sounds like we have a hypocrite here. First he tells us he hated the lifestyle, never wanted to have a thing to do with it again. Now he's saying he embraced it and didn't want to let it go? Which was it Christian, Did you or did you not want to play the Dom?"

"I did not and still don't care to play the Dom but I wanted to feel like I had some control of my life again and if that's what I had to do to get some then so be it! Call it a desperate sacrifice."

"Or an excuse to fuck the slut-whore for two months… Professor Grey!"

The tension in the room is getting far too heated. Flynn feels the need to intercede before tempers go awry. "I think we all need a time out. This is a good opportunity to have a little break, collect our thoughts and as my daughter would say, chill out. I want you two to calm down. Can't you see that getting upset won't help the situation? Yelling and miscommunication is what got you to this point in the first place. Lets say, ten minutes?"

Without any argument, they agreed. Ana rose from the couch and trotted off to her bedroom for a bit of meditation. Christian got up to stretch his legs, walked out on the terrace to look out upon the serenity of the sand and surf. Before standing up to stretch his own legs Flynn writes in his yellow tablet: _These two people are more in love than they realize. That alone is hope._

…

Ten minutes fly by too quickly, the much-needed intermission has become history. Our favorite duo return all refreshed, composed and ready to restart the forum. They sit down in the same spots as before; sorrowful blue eyes stare across at sorrowful gray. _Why did we let it get this bad?_ Flynn takes the reigns as before. "Now I think we should all keep an open mind from now on. So Christian, you were teaching Cassie the ways of a sub. Where did your instructions take place? In your playroom?

"Not at first. I taught her the basics at this discreet hotel on the outskirts of town. I'd get a room, show her the sub position, told her what was expected of her. I'd bring toys from my playroom: handcuffs, riding crop, rope, blindfolds, a flogger and we'd play a scene. Not hard scenes but enough to teach her about pain, pleasure and punishment."

She looks down at her knotted fingers. Her next question she hated but needed to ask for Ana might despise the answer. "Did you sleep with her there? Did you spend the night?"

"You mean was there vanilla? No. And we never spent the night together. We did our scenes and left."

"What about Escala and the Red Room of Pain?"

"I took her to the playroom when I thought she was ready. Like advancing to high school. And no, there was no vanilla there either."

Ana appears wary of his veracity. "So for a graduation present you hired her as your sub?" she snorts.

"I explained my reasoning for that. It was the need for power and control."

"And I'm sure you enjoyed the fucking aspect of it too, Professor Grey."

Oh, there's that smart mouth again causing certain areas on Christian's body to twitch. He keeps calm; sizes up his answer carefully. "As a matter of fact I did enjoy it but not for the reason you think. Every time I fucked her I imagined I was fucking you. It was you in the playroom suspended or handcuffed to the bed or the cross. You I whipped or flogged or spanked and who sucked my cock. Not her. And she knew it too. Because every time I'd find my release I'd yell out your name. Not hers! At least the times with Cassie in the playroom allotted me the occasional chance to feel I had some control over you. Maybe if I felt I possessed a marginal bit at home I wouldn't have been so depressed and resorted to drowning my sorrows at a bar hence I wouldn't have met Cassandra Zane!"

She sits like a stone pained by his malefic accusation. "So, you're putting the blame on me?"

A frustrated Christian runs fingers through his copper color hair. "No! Not entirely. A small portion maybe! But the majority belongs to me because I'm a weak, self-centered, fifty shades of fucked up asshole who thought he could really get away with something! How moronic is that? Look, you have every right to despise me because I despise myself. You have every right not to forgive me but baby, I'm begging for it. I want to fix our broken marriage. I want to spend my life with the only woman who's ever mattered to me and who's love I don't deserve. I've stomped on your heart I know, but trust me, it will never happen again.

"I can't apologize enough for my atrocious actions. I've bared my soul, I've told you everything. Now it's up to you to decide whether I'm worthy of your mercy. And I had no idea Cassie took those pictures and sent them to you but I'm so fucking glad she did. Your leaving taught me the biggest lesson of my life."

"Wait. Cassie took those pictures? But, how do you know this?"

_Shit! Shit! Shit!_ Christian could kill himself for having such a loose tongue. He feels absolution slipping through his fingers like beach sand. "Uh, Taylor and I found this out."

"How? When?"

Panic wells in his chest; he fidgets in his seat. This is not good, not good at all… but the situation's going to get worse. "Uh, well Cassie showed up at Grey House three weeks ago. Had something very important to tell me."

Ana's going to be sorry for her suspicious curiosity. "Like what?"

He winces from the stabbing of the final nail in his coffin. "It appears that Cassie is er, pregnant."

That did it. The information no wife wants to hear. Wide-eyed and nauseous Ana put a hand over her mouth and quickly runs out the sliding glass door, down the stairs toward the beach. _Shit! Shit! And double shit!_

…

**Ana**

Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! I didn't think things could get any worse but boy, was I wrong! I have to get away! Can't get down the stairs fast enough. I've got to barf, I mean really blow chunks. _Blegh!_ Great! There goes my lunch all over the sand. How disgusting! I guess better there than all over my shoes. Yuck! How could that son-of-a-bitch do that to me?

"Ana, wait!"

Oh, God, wouldn't you know it. The jerk followed me. Why couldn't he have just left me alone? I wish I were a sand crab right now escaping across the shore.

"Ana, are you okay?"

What did he just ask me? If I'm okay? Does that fucking jackass really think I'd be okay after hearing that news? Ohhh, he better not come any closer or he's going wish he hadn't. But no, he couldn't stay away. He right behind me. One, two, three, _Whaack!_ There! I hope that hurt the side of his face as much as it hurt my hand! "YOU BASTARD! YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" Yeah, by the color of pink his cheek is turning I sure it did. And the best part is he didn't see it coming! "HOW DARE YOU! Wasn't it bad enough she was your secret student sub? Did you have to go and knock the slut-whore up too?"

"Ana, please, calm down."

He's telling me to calm down? How the hell am I supposed to calm down when I'm absolutely livid! "Don't tell me to calm down! And don't you dare try to touch me either! So, I suppose congratulations are in order? You must be real proud of yourself huh, Christian? So tell me, how far along is the little slut-whore?"

"Almost five months but…"

"FIVE MONTHS? Are you shitting me?" I hope he'sshitting me!

"I swear to you, that's not my baby!"

Unbelievable! But so typical! And I thought I was the one in denial! "And where have I heard that before? Oh yes. You said the same thing about Teddy! Guess who was wrong!"

If I don't turn around right now and walk down that beach there's going to be some serious damage… and he'll be the punching bag! No, wait. Before I do, I'm going to need a few answers. "Do you love her Christian?"

"What? No! Never!" _Liar!_

"Never? Because I find that very hard to believe! Want to try again? But this time try telling the truth." _Please don't say yes!_

"Fine! You want the truth? Well here it is. Yes, I had affection for Cassie, but it wasn't what you call love, not like I have for you. And you want to know why? Because I could talk to her! We could sit down and have a nice conversation without it turning into a yelling match. And even if it was only in the playroom at least someone was letting me fuck her!"

Wow! Two low albeit deserving blows. Who knew honesty could hurt so much. I glance over and notice nosy Mrs. Capshaw walking her labradoodle. Better tell the loud-mouthed dummy to lower his voice. "Speaking of the fucking slut-whore, tell me Christian, was she better than me?"

Hmp. My inquiry leaves him exasperated. He heaves a sigh. _Oh my God I love it when his chest heaves._ "What do you mean, Ana? In what way?"

"You know, more willing? Was she always wetter? Were her nipples harder? Did she taste sweeter? Did she 'come for me baby' faster? Were her orgasms deeper? When she came did she scream your name out louder? Did her ass get pinker when you spanked her? And how many inches of your foot-long was she able to take in her mouth? Please Christian, an inquiring mind such as my own has the right to know!"

"Will you give it a rest, Ana? You want an answer? Well, there's only one I can give you: I. Have. No. Fucking. Idea! I wasn't keeping a fucking journal because I didn't fucking give a shit! Believe me Ana, there's nobody's better than you. No one even comes close."

Sweet. But I hope he's not saying that just for my benefit! I accept his words as gospel and don't give them a second thought… and then I do. "Whoa, let me get this straight. You just said there's nobody better than me right? That no one even comes close? But you also said that every time you fucked the slut-whore that I'm the one you thought of. Sorry, but that sounds like she must have been just as good as me to make you think that way. So that makes your excuse pretty darn pathetic and full of crap."

He's frustrated now. I know because he's running his fingers through his copper color hair. _The copper color hair that's blowing so freely in the wind_ _and you love to grasp while having sex._ Stop it!

"Christ Ana, only you would take it apart and make it sound like a damn competition! Either that or you're jealous it wasn't you in the playroom I was fucking."

_Shit!_ Another round goes to him! " Okay, let's talk about the pictures."

"What about the pictures?"

"I want you to explain them."

"Explain them how? They're black and white pictures that were taken without my knowledge by Cassie. There. You know as much as I do."

"Well, they obviously weren't taken in the playroom which means they must have been taken at that hotel! And the two of you looking pretty darn intimate in some of them which would leave one with the impression there was more being taught in the classroom besides the three P's: pain, pleasure and punishment. I think there was a fourth P being taught called passion. Please explain if you can, Professor Grey."

"First, quit calling me Professor Grey. Second, you forget, I saw the pictures too and not one of them screamed 'passion' or had anyone in the throes of passion. Playful agony maybe but not passion! There's only been one person I've ever felt passionate about in the playroom or any other room. You! And third, let me introduce a fifth P to the group: paranoia! Because that's what you are Ana, you're paranoid!"

_Shit!_ He wins again! "Fine, have it your own way but that still doesn't make up for the fact got that slut-whore pregnant! I was ready to forgive your sorry ass until you hit me with this bombshell! I mean how would you feel if I were to tell you I was having another man's baby? Like a trash bin load of crap, huh? But don't worry that's not going to happen because I've always been faithful to you… except for one time." Oh my God, the look on his face is priceless. The veins in his neck are bulging. He's furious enough to strangle me with seaweed. "Yes Christian, I _did_ have a liaison, but hardly worth mentioning. You see when I saw the pictures your slut-whore was gracious to send me a second time all I wanted to do was go out and wasted. Very wasted because I couldn't believe you'd be that cold hearted. So I did. While I was sitting at one of the hotel bars drowning my sorrows this nice, handsome, suave, gentleman came over and sat next to me, and boy we hit it off. I mean we really hit it off! Does this story sound familiar to you? It's very 'Christian Greyish', isn't it?"

His response is a tense jaw, arms folded across his chest and a steel stare. Perturbed to the max are we?

"Well, he invited me up to his room and I jumped at the chance to go with him. It's mostly a blur now but I do remember getting to second base with him. I don't know about third because I passed out or I should say _we_ passed out. When I came to I saw that my dress and bra were off and my black lace panties were down around my knees. The poor sap whose name I can't even remember was still passed out cold on the floor near the other side of the bed with his boxer shorts still on so I doubt penetration occurred. That's right Christian, the valley remained untouched but the mountains up here had been explored! I don't know how but I got dressed again and the hell out of there. Since I was in no shape to drive I had to call Kate to come get me. Unlike a certain someone, I felt horrible I had done it and never did it again.

I stop to wipe away the few salty tears that had run down my suntanned cheek. "So, what do think of my cheating skills, huh? Not quite in the same league, pales in comparison to yours. I think it's time you went back to the bitch who's carrying your baby and leave me alone!"

Before I have an opportunity to walk back toward the house he grasp hold of my upper arm and squeezes it tightly. His eyes are coal black. "That. Is. Not. My. Baby!" He growls fiercely.

Who is this Christian? Not the one who followed me here. This one is cruel, intense, dangerous, dark, very dark. I've never seen him like this. Oh my God. What have I done? Pushed him too far? Unlocked the deepest, darkest Dominant side of Christian there is? I'm worried and trembling. _No Ana, just remain_ _calm_. "Christian, let go. You're hurting me! And scaring me too."

His reaction is slow relaxation. His facial features soften; his eyes become pools of liquid gray again and he releases his vice-like grip. I doubt he's aware he turned into such a beast.

"I'm going back to the house now and I don't want you to follow me."

He looked sorrowful and apologetic. The begging in his eyes is excruciating. "I'm sorry Ana. I'm trying to tell you, that baby, I'm being framed."

"You're always being framed aren't you Christian? The excuse is getting old. Excuse me. I'm going to go have a talk with John now. Alone." I turn to leave behind a remorseful soul. I'd be fooling myself if I say I don't care.

When is the hurt going to end.

**AA/N: Yes, I'm ready for the hate mail. But things are not what they appear. **


	21. Chapter 21

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 21

From bad to worse

**A/N: Oh God, I realize this is sooo late an update but I've been in mourning. I had to put one of my dogs down so I haven't felt much like writing. But hey, Here we go, better late than never! **

Well, that attempt at a reasonable meeting of the minds went terribly askew. What started as bad went very bad… maybe to the worse case scenario. Thoughts were expressed, demands heard, voices raised, emotions freed, secrets revealed, tears shed, tempers flared, regrets abound. No compromise, no mended fences, no new beginning. Just another obstacle to bare, mess to deal with, gap in the bridge across the sea of marital discord to a place called Happily Ever After. Will Christian and Ana be able to find that land again? Or will their marriage drown a watery death.

Does any hope remain?

…

John Flynn is not present when an emotionally spent, sand covered, red-eyed Ana bounds up the stairs and enters the house in search of some kind of solace. She stands frantic; eyes scanning about trying, but unsuccessfully able to discover his whereabouts. But he finds her. Rounding the hall corner, returning from a bathroom break (poor guy's been sitting for hours, drank ice tea, come on, he needed the relief!) he spots the distraught woman.

"Ana? What happened? What's wrong?"

She rushes to the good doctor, a pained expression on her face. "John, I need some advice. I don't know what to do now. This pregnancy… I… Maybe you can help me."

John could hear the hurt in Ana's voice, put his arms around her in comfort and led her over to the couch. He could only assume that what had transpired on the beach was a great big train wreck. "Of course I will, you know that. But first, I advise you not to do anything in haste you might regret later."

They sat down and she fiddled nervously in her seat. "John, may I ask what your first reaction was when he told you of the affair?"

"Naturally I was appalled. I wanted very much to cut ties with him, throw him from my office. I was very much tempted to refer Christian to one of my colleagues. I hate to brag but I've been told I'm a charitable man and here before me sat a pathetic shell of a man, a man I'd met several years ago who, needed guidance. I hope you realize I'm going against the code of ethics by informing you of this information, doctor/patient privacy and all but under the circumstances I feel it's necessary to do so. Has anyone ever told you what happened to him when he discovered you'd left and taken Teddy with you? He crumbled. Grace told me he'd reverted back into that scared little four-year old boy again.

"It took a month of recoupment before I saw him again. You see Christian hadn't seen me for months so his return came as a surprise. He had regressed, closed up, become angry. I imagined more with himself than anyone else. Just as I had suspected most of our sessions were in silence. He'd sit, withdrawn, sullen. And when he'd talk he said very little. I'm not making excuses for him, just stating facts.

"It took weeks before he had the nerve to admit the shame of the liaison. He'd break down and cry your name in remorse until the end of our sessions. I'd never seen him so weak before. When he finally came to terms with his infidelity he opened up and the visits ran freely. None of this makes up for the fact that he cheated though."

"I'm having a hard time accepting his reasoning for the affair. I just don't get it. It sounds so lame."

"I understand your difficulty comprehending the logic he's set forth, Ana. For many men, sex equals control. And as you're aware of that factor has always been a hard issue of Christian's. As with his past lifestyle, trust, control above anything else was paramount. There were no feelings on his part for his submissives. They were there to serve a purpose, satisfy his need for control and nothing more. There was never an emotional attachment to any of them not even Leila. He pitied her more than anything else."

"Than the slut whore Cassie must have been different. He admitted having affection for her."

"Affection wears many different faces, Ana. The affection he showed Cassie was in the form of gratitude. Not love, nor adoration. I've always harbored a suspicion regarding her true intentions though. Like how she knew to broach a subject connected to his past. And preying on him by constantly bringing it to his attention, weakening his resistance to the point the beast took over and he succumbed to the strong urge of satisfying a part of his life he thought was buried and didn't need nor want. See? How did she know to plant the seed? And cultivate so it would grow to consume him where the temptation was too great to ignore? Ana, you above all know his vulnerability for power and control."

… _Just goes to show you how weak a man he really is. And that's my fault. I made him weak…_

She knew in her heart Flynn was telling the truth. Christian's biological mother, Ella had told her the same. Her next question made her heart ache; she winced as the words left her mouth. "What about the pregnancy? The idea that slut whore is having my husband's baby makes me ill. How do you expect me to forgive him for that?"

"First, there's no validity to the assumption the baby is his. That fact has yet to be proven. She's had no future contact with him. Don't you think if the baby were truly his she'd try and keep in touch?"

"Look, I know he thinks this baby is a sham, that she's out to get him because he's Christian Grey. Well come on, if he hadn't fucked her in the first place he wouldn't be in this mess. But he did! I say suffer the fucking consequences, big man. Take the responsibility for having a twitchy dick. The one thing he really should have been in control of!"

Flynn scratches his chin in an inquisitive manner. "Let me, if I may, pose this question to you, Ana. What would be your course of action if indeed the baby turned out to be his?"

She looks down at her feet and knots her fingers, "I-I don't know." she mumbles. "I'd have to give that some thought."

"May I be nosy and ask what happened between you and Christian out on the beach?"

Ana sighs deeply wishing she could forget about the 'seaside squabble'. "Oh, we cleared the air, got everything out in the open, said some pretty hateful things to each other, many that were deserved and some that weren't. I let him know I was going to forgive him, which I was. But when he told me he'd knocked up the slut whore I changed my mind. I don't think he was too pleased about my decision because he attacked me! Really scared me."

"He attacked you how?"

"Grabbed my arm, squeezed it so tight I bet there's a bruise now! Shook me and growled like some monster had possessed him. I've never seen his eyes so wild! He's looked fierce before, forceful like in the playroom, but never mean or cruel like that. You'd think I'd unleashed the Dominant Hulk! I remember Grace mentioning he'd turned to his dark side for a while but that dark? Is this true, John? And why the sudden reappearance?"

"It occurs sporadically. He gets too provoked and well, you witnessed the result: like an uncorked champagne bottle. It happens during sessions at times. I can sometimes push his buttons a little too far. Never lasts long, a release of some sort. I'm surprised he held it in this long. He got pretty riled in here."

"Well then I riled him up three times as much out there. He exploded! Like some damn volcano! If that's the affect I have on him when we argue than no thank you. I don't want to live under the same roof with that, that powder keg, and I won't expose the children to his raging tantrums either. Tell him to control that dark anger _and_ his erection then maybe there's a chance for us. In the five years we've been married I've seen his temper flare and justifiably so like with Jack Hyde and Elena, but not with me! And it's not going to start now. See? There's another reason why I can't trust him."

"Can't or won't. Or don't want to try?"

Ana paused because thinking of a good comeback was hard! _Oh no! What if_ _it's true! Do I or do I?_ "Please stop with your psychobabble! You're just confusing me! Yes, I'm still in love with him if that's what you're thinking but I'm not going to put up with his lies, rampages and deceit any longer! What if I do take him back and he decides, "Hey, to hell with Ana, I want another slut whore and bastard baby." What am I suppose to do? Say, 'Oh, Christian, that's wonderful! I can't wait. The more the merrier?' Sorry, but I'm not Mormon, I'm not about to share my husband again! One Cassie in my marriage is one too many. I'd rather cut off his balls first!"

"Bravo!" Flynn begins clapping his hands and stands up. "Excellent Ana. I'm glad to see you're sticking up for yourself. Am I safe in assuming you're not opposed to salvaging your marital union?"

"You know John this may sound crazy but when I died in the OR I saw ghosts or maybe they were angels of Christians mother and my father. She assured me our marriage would be strong again, that he more than anything wants to make it up to me, wants us to be a family again. And I believe her. She also told me it wouldn't be immediately and there'd be bumps along the way. I just had no idea one of them would be a baby bump!"

Ana's amusing retort brings a soft chuckle and a wide grin to Flynn's face. "Sometimes our dearly departed loved ones have more insight than we the living give them credit for."

"So the answer to your question is yes, I'm more than ready to try. But only if he gets his shit together first! If he's truly earnest about starting over then call it an incentive." She sits up straight and breathes deeply looking more relaxed than half an hour ago. "Wow! I feel so much better! Thanks for the advice John… and the session!"

Flynn's chuckle turns into a full-blown belly laugh. "Any time!"

…

**Half an hour ago…**

He watches as the gulls cry and waves crash and his wife walk up the stairs. And feels his weight sink down upon the grainy shore. The dejected soul plays with the sand letting each tiny granule sift through his fingers the same way he's imagining Ana's slipping through them too. Christian isn't aware of Taylor's presence until a strong hand is felt upon his shoulder. He glance's up with watery gray eyes, "I've fucked up big time this go around. A bigger fuckin' jackass never lived."

Taylor let out a slight grunt as he sat on the beach next to him. "Ya ain't gettin' a argument out of me Boss."

"Damn fuckin' weak bastard I am. Never was good enough for Ana. Just a sick warp bastard for five year living a lie. Thinking I deserved a beautiful woman like her who made me feel like I was worth a shit when I really wasn't. Loved me, showed me love, taught me how to love and what do I do? I ruin it. I made it ugly. I brought darkness and evil to her life. Hell, I've done the same with everyone. Mom, Dad, Mia, Elliott, You, Gail, Sawyer. I've brought pain and sorrow to all of you including my crack whore mother. I should have never been born. I should have died in the ER and saved all of you the grief. Damn fifty shades of fucked up bastard."

Christian hangs his head and starts sobbing Ana's name uncontrollably. The sea wind picks up and blows through his copper hair, Children play in the sand, people walk by or lay on blankets soaking up the afternoon sun as this 'seashell' of a man continues to spire downward.

Taylor is fed up playing witness to such a disgusting sight. "Finished with your 'pity party' yet?"

His boss's head rises; eyes red and swollen with tears. "It's all true."

"No it ain't! Well, not most of it."

"Yes it is. I've lost her, Jason. And I don't know how to get her back."

Taylor shakes his head and goes about belittling him with encouragement. "So, you're just going to give up, wash your hands of it, throw in the towel? The Grey I know isn't defeated this easily."

"She just told me she doesn't want anything to do with me! To leave her alone, that she never wants to see me or talk to me again. She hate's me, Jason! She despises me! And she has every right to."

"Oh bullshit! What a load garbage that is! She loves you, Christian, just as much as you love her. Give her some slack will ya? Ana's an emotional wreck right now like you. Let her have some time to calm down."

"What if she doesn't change her mind?" he groans in despair, "What if she's had enough? Wants to call it quits? What am I suppose to do then?"

"Jeez, you are a pessimistic son-of-a-bitch aren't you! Ya keep fighting, that's what you're supposed to do. Earn her trust back any way ya can. Prove to her your determination. Show her how much ya care about her and the kids. How sincere ya are about fixing things, building your marriage, your family, your relationship back up to be stronger and better then new. 'Love never fades and is all eternal throughout the sands of time'."

"That's nice! Where'd you learn that?"

Taylor shrugs, "I read it off a Hallmark card. But hey, it fits this here situation to a tee."

"You know what?" Christian moaned, "Ana was ready to forgive me. She wanted me back regardless. And then stupid me had to go and spring that gem about Cassie on her. I'm gonna rue to my dying day I ever met that fuckin' bitch! The worst thing that's ever happened in my life has just costs me the best."

"Yeah, that broad's like a pimple on the nose of humanity, all right."

"Another Hallmark card?" smirks Christian.

"Nah. That's what my ma called my ex. Great hindsight that woman."

A few chuckles then silent reflection as the blue waves lap to shore, and surfers surf and the sun starts to dim from the clouds. Frustrated, Christian runs his slender fingers through his hair. "Do you really think I have a snowballs-chance-in-hell of winning her back?"

"Yep," Jason says, popping the 'p', "I do. Eventually. But until then you'll score better if you keep a lock on a few items like that temper of yours and 'mini-me' there between your legs."

"Good point, well taken."

"Can we get up now Boss? My ass is fallin' to sleep."

"Yeah, sure. Another good point, well taken. Because this ass's ass is too!"

As they groan to a standing position Christian and Taylor are unaware of a pair of sorrowful azure blue eyes watching from afar. They carefully dust off the sand making sure each and every granule stays behind (as we know that's never the case. Beach sand has a mind of its own). Taylor puts an encouraging arm around Christian's shoulder and assuming Ana might be finished with her discussion with Dr. Flynn, slowly leads him back to the house. He was right. She was.

With particles still falling from their clothing, a tromping sound is all that can be heard as they make it up the stairs to the glass door. They halt and wait until the kind doctor motions them a safe entrance. He, Luke and Ana stand, still quietly chatting. The room is enveloped in an awkward silence. She turns away not able to look Christian in the face. He wishes she hadn't. The angst between the two is strong; words are desperate to be spoken. But neither makes the effort to go first.

Flynn cannot take the uneasiness any longer. He clears his throat and speaks in hopes one of them will follow his lead. "Ana, Christian. Does one of you have anything they want to say to the other?"

_Yes! No. Maybe. Yes! No. Of course I do! Nothing. Uh, no thank you._

Good Lord, who invited the blizzard? Will one of them say something before an iceberg forms? Finally one did.

"Ana, I want you to know how much I want to make it up to you, how much I want us to be a family again, how much I miss you and need you."

She faces him oblivious to the fact she is biting her lip. Poor Christian. Her voice is warm instead of frostbitten. "I know. And I want that too."

He could not be more elated. "You do?"

"Of course. It's…it's just…"

Ana becomes pensive. Christian starts to impatiently bagger. Which isn't helping the situation. "It's just what?"

"It's just not the right time."

He raises a brow curiously. "I don't understand, Ana. What do you mean?"

"I mean," she answers, irritation brewing in her voice, "I don't feel now is the right time to discuss a reconciliation."

"Why not? When do you feel would be the right time?"

The annoyance reaches a dangerous level. "Oh, let's say four months from now after the bitch gives birth to your illegitimate baby, then we can talk!"

"Ana, I told you…"

Here we go again.

Flynn decides this is the perfect time to intercede. "I think it's time we left. Come, Christian, Taylor."

Yes, a hasty departure is indeed what the doctor ordered before things became too heated and out of hand. Leave the flames of a feud extinguished. The three men stroll to the front door giving cordial adieus. Luke notices how agitated Ana's become and stands by her side hoping to keep matters in tow. But she fumes and grabs Christian's arm. "A few questions before you go please? First: are you sorry you got caught?"

He's thrown for a loop but readily gives her his answer. "No, I'm not sorry! It's the best wake-up call I could have gotten."

She's satisfied with his reply, exactly what she wanted to hear. "Okay, if you hadn't gotten caught would you still be with her?"

Christian pauses, which might not be a good sign but he feels he needs to be truthful no matter the cost. "I don't know, Ana. I honestly don't know!" _Wrong answer Grey!_

Ana angrily crosses her arms across her chest, "Does that mean maybe you'd still be with the slut whore?"

"No, that means I don't have an answer because I can't see into the future! But as it stands right now, definitely not!"

"Good, because you better not! Now goodbye Christian! Laters, babe!"

Christian smirks, "Laters, Ana."

**AA/N: I have to say, I'm astounded at the number of the reviews I received for that last chapter! Over 70? Wow! You guys are amazing! Thank you all so much.**

**XOXO, Nan **


	22. Chapter 22

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 22

Daydream Believer

**A/N: Wow! A thousand review! I love you guys! You are all amazing! As always I take far too long to update but here you go. Advice: please read the last part carefully.**

Though circumstances were not at its brightest Christian couldn't help but grin… albeit a tiny one. Ana's last words, "Laters babe" gave him a little speck of hope that maybe things between them were not as bad as he'd thought. This distasteful situation might still have a way of resolution. This being for she never uses that expression in a mean or spiteful way. But hey, there's always a first time… isn't there! He wanted desperately to ask if he could visit with his children but in the knowledge of their absence it would just be a futile request. Or worse fuel their mother's simmered ire. _Maybe the next time you can you jackass. If there is one!_ Surely Christian doesn't believe that Ana would be so cold-hearted as to deny him the parental right of his children! Never let him give Teddy a great big hug or tussle his copper colored hair again or, give him the pleasure of cuddling his little daughter Phoebe in his arms close to his breast for the very first time. No, she'd never do that! But hey, there's always a first time… isn't there!

Still ridding their clothing and footwear the souvenir remains of the beach (as you recall beach sand has a mind of its own), Christian, Taylor and Flynn (John needn't the worry of that action but played witness to the gritty residue left behind of the car seats anyway,) depart for the half hour drive to San Luis Obispo airport and the waiting GEH jet. The ride in the car is spent conversing about the good, bad and promising results of the day. Quite different from the ride in the plane back to Seattle where except for the gentle hum of the engine the flight was draped in virtual silence: Taylor seemed to be napping off in his seat, Flynn quietly flipped through the latest edition of Time magazine, while Christian sat sulking in recollection of the 'beachhouse dispute' and the 'seaside incidence' and debating the 'woulda, shoulda and coulda' of both. Also on his mind was the disturbing issue of his loss of Ana's trust and the manner in which he should go about gaining it back. And like a flash it came to him: the probable first step. Christian couldn't have been more enthused to get the ball rolling on his strategy that he practically willed the plane a faster return.

Stimulated and eager, the second upon entering the foyer of Escala his plan is revealed: "First thing we do Taylor," he demanded sturdily, "is get rid of the playroom! Burn every item in there if you must but get them out of my sight! If I'm going to bury, no, make that destroy that fucking BDSM monster then I don't want or need the temptation. This whole mess happened because I was weak, vulnerable, at my lowest and easily lured back into that fucking lifestyle. All because I wanted control back! Well fuck control! Only good in the business world anyway! What I do need is my Ana, to have faith in me again and this just might be the best way to start."

…

**Back at the beach**

_Thank God they're finally gone!_ Ana breaths a deep sigh at the shutting of the front door. At last her guests have left. She deserves a drink to ease her tension…and wants one. Preferably, some hard liquor. Something that'll burns the throat while going down. But alas, she's nursing so that form of relief is out of the question. She chooses to slump down onto the family room couch instead. Shoulders slouched, at frown on her face, woebegone. Assessing the developments, concerned about others. Like why Christian didn't ask about the kids. _Oh come on Ana, you know the answer to that question. You could_ _tell that he wanted to. It was written all over his face. But he was just considerate enough not to broach the topic thus creating more of a scene. Or cause you any more irritation. And you know it would have. Because you're being a bitch! Damn you anyway!_

Luke comes and sits down next to her, as a form of comfort. Ana leans her forlorn self to his side and moans, "This whole day sucked."

"Why do you say that?" her consoler asks, "You stood your ground, you didn't falter or back down once. You were determined to make your side be heard. And you did! You were great against Christian. I'm very impressed."

"Big deal. Strong Ana. Independent Ana. Unwavering Ana. Does that mean I have to be cruel, hurtful and unfeeling too? I guess so because I was. I didn't care what I said or how it'd affect him, I just said them. Intentionally. I wanted him to know the pain I felt when I found out he betrayed me. The knife he stabbed in my back. How he crushed my soul. Took my heart and smashed it into a million tiny pieces. I…"

The rambling resident abruptly halts and blushes a pinkish hue. How embarrassing she feels for spouting a long-winded revenge. "Sorry. But

I'm pretty sure I got my point across!" She pauses to take in another deep breath. "You know what Luke? I would have forgiven Christian if it hadn't been for that pregnant shut whore."

"Do you really think it's Christian's baby?"

"Oh, maybe," she snorts, "Seventy, thirty I guess. But I'd never admit that to Christian. His reaction to me believing beyond a shadow of a doubt that it's his baby is priceless! I mean come on we both know she's a conniving little bitch who went out of her way to seduce him. But, he's twice the jackass because he let himself be seduced! So maybe he deserves what he gets. A bastard child and a di…" She catches herself before that ugly word escapes her lips. _No, never!_ There's another awkward pause and a slip into an unexpected melancholia. "Can we change the subject please? Maybe talk about your love-life instead?"

Luke rolls his eyes at her suggestion. "My love-life? It was great. Avalon was a perfect girlfriend: beautiful, smart, funny. The sex was out of this world! God, what stamina! But then her linebacker boyfriend whom I had no knowledge of was due to come back so we parted while I still have a spleen and can make coherent sentences. That's the extent of my love-life. Pretty sad huh?"

"I never did like her." she frowns, "Now I like her less."

"Don't we make a depressing team? With both our relationships floating in the bottom of a ceramic toilet bowl."

Ana nods in agreement and rises from the couch with Luke following to join the quest of standing on solid flooring. "Why don't you go pick up the kids and I'll start on din..."

Before she can finish making her demand the Blackberry in her pocket buzzes. There's a smile on her face as wide as a whales fin when she sees the number. She giggles and laughs then says goodbye with a smile on her face. Luke scowls with a slight inkling to the mystery caller's identity. In fact he's positive. For the relationship has grown immensely. "That was Greg wasn't it? Did you mention to Christian you're dating him? I thought you 'cleared the air'."

"Yes it was Greg and no I didn't mention him to Christian because it's none of his God damn business. And we're not dating. How can we be dating when we're always with Teddy? He's just a very close friend, that's all."

"Who'd like to get in your pants!" Luke mumbles, quietly to himself as he turns disgustedly toward the front door and swiftly leaves.

Ana pays him no mind; just walks into the kitchen ready to concentrate on the task at hand: preparing chicken enchiladas and homemade salsa for the evening meal. She delights in the chore; always has enjoyed cooking. A busy little bee slicing up the chicken, the tomatoes, peppers and cilantro and among the quiet and peace of the moment her mind starts to wander…

… _A sunny day, the gentle sea breeze rippling through her long chestnut hair and her white cotton blouse as she strolls down the pier to a waiting yacht, 'The Marilyn'. A familiar face welcomes her aboard. "Well, hello matey? Where's my little buddy?"_

"_Oh Christian decided he wanted Teddy to spend the weekend with him. Last minute and all so how could I say no? After all he is his dad. I'm sure he'd love to be here too. But even though he couldn't come I couldn't resist the invitation so here I am."_

"_And may I say you look beautiful. Sailor stripes suit you." _

_Ana pirouettes, modeling her blue and white striped top and dark navy shorts. "Thanks. I'm so glad you approve. So, Greg, this is your yacht? It's a nice one. Permission to climb aboard?"_

"_It's one of them, the smaller one. The other is moored up near San Francisco. And permission is so granted. Here, let me help." His shaggy blond hair blows with the wind as Greg holds on to her hand and pulls her up and into his waiting arms. He pulls her close and they kiss, tenderly, "God I've missed you, Ana." _

"_Oh I've missed you too. I'm glad it's just you and me today."_

"_Mmm," he growls, "You read my mind. How about we take this puppy out for a spin. Find out how seaworthy she is."_

"_By all means." She giggled, "You're the Captain."_

"_And you are a very sexy First Mate!"_

_And they're off upon the ocean blue! It's sweet sailing from here on. Nothing like a private outing with a friend: the fresh salty air, the bright warmth of the sun, the peaceful relaxing ambiance. Ah, just the perfect escape from the toils of the workweek. He secures his vessel a distance away from shore to enjoy the bliss of being at sea. Ana lays on a deck chair in her mini black bikini soaking the sun's rays; Greg comes back on deck carrying two glasses of Merlot and hands one to her. She accepts with pleasure. Wine and thine. What could be more wonderful…or romantic! And the small talk and whatever, begins. _

"_So, you named your boat Marilyn huh? A significance or are you a fan of Monroe's" _

"_Well yes I am a fan," he says sitting down in the chair next to her. "But no, I named her after my sister. She died of ALS two years ago. We were very close. It's kind of a tribute to her."_

"_Oh, I'm so sorry." _

_Greg pulls her onto his lap, "It's okay. She's happy now, in a better place. I figure she's my guardian angel, always looking over my shoulder." _

_Their soft, warm lips meet and they kiss, his mouth invades hers; she moans_ _in delight. He pulls Ana closer into a tight embrace. His hands caress hers suntanned shoulders, down her arms, her sides. He nips her earlobe and run kisses down her neck and chest, licking at her bosom. Ana purrs. Whispers of yearning come from them both. She grinds against his erection and without a hesitation removes her bra. Greg's hands cup her full supple breasts, her back bows forward inviting her pink, hard nipples to be pinched and sucked. How could he resist such and offer. His right hand runs down her belly to her hip and undoes the string of her bikini while she obliges with the other side. His finger explores her dripping 'bounty' and she falls over the edge in desire. The passion that burns in them both takes over. Greg lifts Ana up and lays her on the deck, spreads her legs apart and lets his tongue do the exploration now. Oh the licking and tickling, flicking her swollen numb over and over. Sucking and pushing his tongue further and further up her core. Ana pants and trembles; her body tightens and she ecstatically orgasms again. Greg climbs on top of her taking her mouths in his so she can taste for herself her sweet honey arousal. He sits up and pulls down his shorts and the rock hard 'beast' is set free. Ana admires its dimension and wonders what is it with rich billionaires that their 'weapons' are sooo large! She writhes in wanting as he positions the tip at the opening of her 'treasure chest' and eases in slowly filling her up, in and out creating a rhythm with the rocking of the boat. Her hands grab onto his buttocks urging him forward. Gradually he picks up speed: faster and deeper, with more fervor with every thrust. The only sounds to be heard are the waves lapping against the sides, heavy panting and increasing louder moans and grunts. His hips grind harder and tighter to hers; their bodies are covered in glorious sweat. Greg finds his release; Ana's orgasm ravishes her body and she screams…_

"HOLY FUCK!"

Oh my. The pain, the agony… the blood! That's what happens when you get carried away, you slice your finger!

Ow! Ow! Shit! Shit! Ouch! Ouch! God dammit to hell! What an incredibly stupid mistake! It hurts so bad and won't stop bleeding. Even holding her finger under the faucet doesn't help! Lord, this brought to Ana's mind an old SNL sketch where Julia Child cut her finger. It wouldn't stop bleeding either. And she bled to death. Shivers. Bon Appetite!

Oh thank goodness, just in time. Dr. Luke arrives with his two aides Teddy and baby Phoebe. They'll make her 'boo-boo' all better. Luke doesn't dawdle. He quickly runs to the bathroom and grabs the medical kit and bandages his patient up nice and secure. And his aides kiss away the ouchie. Her gratitude is indescribable.

Though his curiosity is piqued this medic decides against questioning the cause. He smirks instead assuming his suspicions to be right on the money. They are. Our daydreamer shies away from his silent accusation, takes a big breath and sheepishly goes back to her task.

Proof that even imaginary sex in the kitchen can be harmful!

…

**Later in Seattle**

Thanks to Gail and her extraordinarily delicious mac and cheese his tummy is full and he's in a calmer state of mind. Christian is in his office sat behind his desk catching up on some business transactions he's missed due to his absence. Taylor comes in with some news to share with his boss. "Just thought you'd like to know what's doing with this Cassie dame."

"Yeah? Anything new for me?"

"Well, we've been tailing her for the past three weeks and find out she goes to work part time, three days a week at this fancy, shmancy boutique. We ran a check on the shop, its legit. This woman texts more than anyone I've ever seen, even more so than my daughter Sophie. And that's a lot! She lives in this nicely kept up two-story house, white picket fence the whole shmear about five blocks away. Its owner is a Rue Benson. I know, nothin' ordinary about that but here's the thing, Rue Benson has been dead for three years. No other ownership papers exist. Nada. Doesn't list any kin either. Once a week she goes to the free clinic and is seen by the OB-GYN that works there. We checked the doc out and sorry boss, I know you were hopin' for a sham but her patient is most definitely preggers."

"Shit!"

"Yeah, no kidding. But there still ain't no proof it's yours."

"True. Point well taken. Anything else?"

"Cassie has a friend sharing the house with her, a blond by the name of Abby King. She's a dental assistant. Very plain-Jane kinda nondescript. Has a boyfriend though, a nerdy looking fellow, Alton Phillips. My question is this, why is Cassie hangin' around with folks like that? If I remember correctly, they don't seem like her type of crowd if you know what I mean. But I tell ya this whole thing don't seem right. Something's rotten in the state of Denmark and I'm gonna find out what! Well that's all for right now. I'll keep ya posted on any new developments."

"Thanks, Jason. You're doing a great job. I hope we get to the bottom of this soon. I've just got to get that damn bitch out of my life."

"Yeah Boss, me too."

…

Time passes far too quickly, like a blink of an eye, a flash of lightening, at unbelievable speed, not to be imagined. So fast it's hard to take the fleeting of days, weeks and months seriously. It's now December, the winter season. Christmas is upon us. A bright shiny Christmas tree that Ana, Teddy and Luke took great pride in decorating, stands in the corner of the beach house in Cayucos with a toy train chugging its way around the bottom and colorful presents abound. Four stocking are hung on the brick fireplace mantle, a wreath adorns above it where a large seascape usually hangs. Boats sail by in the ocean all decorated with bright multi-colored lights adding more to the holiday flair. Ana and Luke laugh because Teddy wants a puppy for Christmas. Hmm, maybe when he's older. And with Phoebe it doesn't matter, any present will do for her. All in all a cheery, happy feeling is definitely in the air: a very festive one for sure.

In Seattle at Escala, Gail has readied the apartment in as merry and joyful as can be: garland, wreaths, beautiful seasonal centerpieces with snowmen and candles placed on tables, a nativity scene sets in the corner (yes, even ex-Doms believe). Taylor brought up a big tall tree and he, Gail and Christian too, decorated it to the max: shiny balls of every shape size and color, popcorn garland, silver tinsel, candy canes and a golden angel on top. And of course more presents than you can shake a stick at. Even the black grand piano is deck out for the holiday with large red and green ribbon and bows, pinecones and silver bells. All this wonderful preparation is for Teddy and Phoebe's visit. They can't wait!

But alas work does not stop just because Saint Nick is coming to town. Neither does Christian. He's in his home office toiling away at his computer looking over the newest M and A's. His concentration is interrupted by a Skype message. It is Ana. And he is delighted. "Merry Christmas, Ana. How are you doing? How are the kids?"

She's matter-of-factly, kinda grumpy, certainly not jolly or in a 'Christmas' type of mood. "Merry Christmas, Christian. I'm fine and so are they."

He notices her testy behavior but decides to ignore it. "Well I'm so looking forward to their visit. So are Jason and Gail and all the family, Mom and Dad especially. They've got so many presents to open it isn't even funny!"

"That's why I called. They can't come. Not right now. Maybe after New Years."

Christian's face falls. He fights hard to not show his disappointment. "But why? You promised they could come. I haven't seen…"

"Because Teddy and Phoebe both have colds," she spat, "That's why! And I don't want them traveling. Surely you must understand!"

His shoulders sag and he looks glum. He so wanted to show his babies a good time. "Yes, I-I guess I do."

"Speaking of presents did you get mine?"

"I don't think so. No."

"Funny, I was told it was delivered yesterday."

He shakes his head negatively. "Sorry, no. The only thing that was delivered yesterday was…" He looks over at the manila envelope lying on the left hand side of his desk. He shudders as he assumes the contents.

"I want you to open it Christian."

His hand trembles as he picks up the envelope and opens the flap. He was right. "So," he says crestfallen, "You're going through with it. But why?"

"Because I want out Christian, I've had it. This situation, it's just not working so I want a divorce."

"What do you mean? If you mean me well I've changed. I've gotten rid of the playroom, I don't have those urges anymore I'm more in control of my emotions. Just ask anyone. Jason, Gail, John, any member of my family. Even Claude or Ros! Please baby, haven't I proven that to you yet?"

Ana snidely laughs, "Oh come on, be real. I know your exorbitant need for sex. If you want me to believe you've taken a vow of celibacy, then reindeer really do know how to fly. Besides, I've met someone."

_What did she say?_ Christian feels is fury flare. _Come on, Grey, don't lose it!_ "Who?"

"You know him. Greg."

His temper is seething and his fists are clenched so tightly his knuckles have turned white. "That… fucking playboy?"

"Yes, Christian, him. And we've fallen in love."

_No, that can't be! You're mine, Ana, and always will be!_ "So, I take it you've been fucking him?"

Another snide laugh can be heard. "No, we don't call it fucking, we call it making love. And we do it a lot!"

"Are you pregnant?" He asks, as he squirms in his brown leather chair, "Is that why you want the divorce?"

"No, I'm not pregnant! Greg and I use protection, which, is more than I can say about you and that little slut whore! Speaking of the bitch, she's due to pop out that spawn of yours soon isn't she?"

By now he's boiling. "I told you, Ana, that's not…"

"Ooo, watch it fella! Looks like you're losing control. Naughty, naughty! Mustn't do that! And you can deny all you want, "That's not my baby, boo, hoo, hoo," but you know the truth, don't you? And speaking of the truth, thanks for telling me the truth about your relationship with her, how she was more than just your pupil, she was your mistress! Those sudden extra weekend business trips, ones you should have been home spending time with Teddy and your family, you were really spending with her at Escala or that hotel or the condo you bought just for her. Yeah, Christian, didn't think I'd find out about that did you? Oh, I can just imagine all the humping and bumping and vanilla sex that went on, all the "Come for me Cassie's", all those screaming " Oh, oh, oh Christian!" orgasms. Really, can you honestly comprehend how utterly humiliated I felt when I found out I was being played a fool of? No, I bet you can't!"

He gulps and stares at the screen in blank silence.

"Sign the papers, Christian."

"And what if I don't?"

"Then you'll be sorry. I'll make it so you never see your children again."

"You can't do that and you know it! I'm their father! I have rights!"

"Just try me! Sure, sleeping with Greg may make me look like a 'tramp' in your eyes but better they live with me than an adulterous, lying sadist like you who cheats on his wife and neglects his children! Guess whom the courts would choose if it came down to suing me for custody! You, oh powerful CEO, may have a great attorney but I have an even better one thanks to Greg. And as far as you being their father, well Teddy will adapt. He adores Greg and visa versa. And Phoebe, she doesn't even know who you are. She thinks Luke is her father. That's right, she's calls him "Da-da"! So my advice is don't fight me, sign the papers!"

"But, Ana, you've got to give me another chance. Let me make it up to you. I know I can. Ana, baby, I love you."

"Can't you get it through that thick skull of yours that it's over? You may love me but I don't love you, not any more. Face it, we're done with, we're finished! And I don't want anything from you either, I never have. You ruined us Christian, not me, you. You're at fault here, all fifty shades of you! Sign the fucking papers so we can get on with our lives! Or you'll live to regret it. I've got to go now. Ho, ho, ho! Goodbye!"

And she was gone. The computer screen lay blank, as blank as the look on Christian's face. The reality sets in. It, their marriage, their life together has crumbled into dust. _No, no, it can't be! My Ana, my Ana wouldn't do this to me! She couldn't do this to me! This is a joke, a cruel joke, that's all! _

But it's not. This is real and the defeated ghost of a man knows it. Christian breaks down and sobs. Then, in a rage he slams the top of his computer down and tosses it against the wall. With one fell swoop of his arm the desk becomes void: objects and papers go flying even the D-I-V-O-R-C-E ones. He's a desperate, crying man this Christian is. The best thing in his life, his reason for living is no more. This broken man walks to the bookcase, pulls out a few volumes of great literature and retrieves a small box hidden behind them and takes it back to his desk. Inside lay something he terribly abhors but he doesn't care now. With shaky hands he picks it up and aims. Only one shot did the job. Christian topples on top of that beautiful mahogany desk, the smoking gun still in his hand. Blood oozes from his temple creating a deep rich puddle of red by his side.

Taylor's sharp senses heard the shot and he comes running in the office to find blood trickling down on the Oriental carpet and his boss laying still. He's frantic; tears come to his eyes because… he's too late.

Christian is dead.

**AA/N: Okay, go ahead with the hate mail! Gave you a lemon… and a piece of coal! **


	23. Chapter 23

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 23

Incomprehensible

**A/N: Seriously, when I posted that last chapter it never came into mind it was April Fools Day. Strange how timing works out! So I hurried and wrote the next chapter out. I mean come on guys, do you really think I would kill off our imaginary prom date? And thank you all for all those reviews. You fans are the best! So here you go. Enjoy. **

"Hello."

"Jason. Thank goodness. I was just about to call you."

"Oh. Uh, how's Ana."

"Better now. She woke up screaming to the top of her lungs, gasping for air. God, She almost hyperventilated. Took me forever to calm her down. And how's Christian?"

"Oh, Jesus. I was sure he was having a heart attack the way he was clenching his chest. He was at his desk here at home and I had some news to tell him and found him that way. Sap fell asleep at the computer again and must have had a nightmare. Bad one, too. Kept mumbling about Christmas and Ana, divorce, dead."

"Sounds like Ana's nightmare too. She had just gotten finished nursing Phoebe and she asked me to put her in her crib, which I love to do anyway because she was so tired. Well she curled up on the couch and fell asleep. A short while later she woke up screaming. Was sort of incoherent. Saying words like Christmas, divorce, I killed him, over and over again."

"Wow. Hey, is it possible for two people to have the same dream at the same time even though they're miles apart?"

"Beats me. Twins maybe? But there's always a first time, isn't there."

"I guess so. Kinda looks like our favorite duo is more connected than you'd think. I'm gonna go talk to the boss and find out the scoop."

"I'm going to talk to Ana too. Jeez, this is so weird, like something from the Twilight Zone maybe."

"I know. Well just thought I'd check on Ana. Tell him she's fine."

"Yeah. I'll go assure her that Christian is very much alive."

"God Luke, if this isn't a sign that these two love and belong together than I don't know what is."

I agree. I hope they see the light soon and stop all this nonsense. It's killing both of them. And driving me crazy!"

"Boy, do I know the feeling! Okay, well thanks Luke. I'm outta here."

"Thanks to you too Jason. Chow."

…

**Luke and Ana**

Hmm, umm, hmm, hmm, hmm. If this isn't the wildest situation ever! Even Jason thinks so. Weird, crazy. Two people, having the same dream at the same time. Ana's in such a zombie-like state over this I'm thinking maybe a good old cup of her favorite, _oh shit._ _Where is that Twinnings?_ tea just might do the trick and help bring her out of it so she'll talk to me about the nightmare she had. Lord, she screamed so loud I'm surprised it didn't wake Teddy up. But then again the guy sleeps like a rock. Except at Christmas time. Bounces around like he just drank a pot of coffee. Oh well, here goes. "Hey Ana, here. I made you some tea. Just like you like it too." _Yeah, hot_ _water with the essence of tea. Go figure!_ Oh, good she heard me. Lifted her head to acknowledge my presence. Maybe we're getting somewhere. Hmm, she must've been cold. Put that crochet blanket that Trudy for no apparent reason made for me around her shoulders. "Are you okay now? Can you tell me what happened?"

"It was awful Luke." _Please speak up will you? It's hard to hear you when_ _you whisper!_

"How awful?"

"It, it was Christmas time and…. and… Christian and I were talking to each other on the computer. He looked so happy but I was a bitch. Oh, Luke, I treated him so bad. I was an ogre, Cruella De Ville, the seahag from 'The Little Mermaid' all rolled up into one. Nasty and viscous! Good God, please don't tell me I'm really like that!"

"I guarantee you're not like that! Go on."

"I… I told him I didn't love him anymore, that I loved somebody else and that I wanted a d…d…di. Oh Luke, I can't even say the word."

"Divorce."

"Yes and I threatened him. I told him I'd take the kids away from him if he didn't sign the papers. I was so vile and disgusting. And, and those, those accusations. Oh, my God! Please don't tell me they're true! Please don't tell me that that slut whore was actually Christian's mistress and he went out and bought her a condo!"

"Relax, Ana. Neither one is true. She wasn't his mistress and Christian didn't buy her a condo." _And how do you know for sure that he didn't and she wasn't?_

" Oh, the look on his face. I mean, I ruined his whole Christmas telling him the kids couldn't come see him and the you know, and that I was in love with Greg and…"

"Wait. You told him you were in love with Greg? He hates the man!"

"I know! But I don't love him! He's just a friend."

_Who wants in your pants!_

"Oh no. You don't think I did that on purpose do you? Because I knew how he'd react? That is just so hurtful on so many levels!"

"I agree. What else?"

"I told him it was over. That we were finish, through, washed up. No more chances. That it was all…his…own…fault! And then I gave him a very snotty goodbye and left. The poor man started crying, I mean really sobbing. And then he took his computer and threw it against the wall, cleared off his desk and went over to the bookcase. He pulled out a box he had hidden. There was a gun inside. I thought Christian hated guns! Why would he have one hidden in the house and not tell me? I mean, he doesn't even know how to use one!"

"What did he do with the gun?"

"What do you think he did with it? He was so desperate and distraught he shot himself! Oh my God, the blood! And Jason was too late. He was already dead. And it was all, my fault! I was so horrible to him. I caused him to take his own life. How could have been sooo rotten."

You're not a rotten person, Ana, it's not your fault so please stop moaning! "I talked to Jason and Christian's fine. Just worried about you. Seems you both had identical nightmares."

"Really? That's strange huh!"

"Very. So see, everything's cool. Christian's not dead and you're not a bad person. Just frightened. Go on now just lay back and relax, okay?"

" 'Kay. Oh Luke. Believe it or not, I really do care about him."

"Good. But you didn't have to tell me, I already knew."

"I just can't forgive him!"

…

**Jason and Christian**

Holy shit! He's having a coronary! At least that's what I thought when I walked in to his office to give him the latest news on that bitch and found him clenching his chest tighter than a drum like he's about to meet his maker. Or walk into the Fade whatever the hell that means. Somethin' Sophie told me from these 'vigilante vampire' books she's reading. Got him calm now though. Finally! Breathin's' okay now, too. Still a little startled. Face is as blank as a sheet of glass and just as colorful. I bet nickels to dimes he's had a nightmare again. Sure as shootin' one about Ana. Poor sap's been doin' that for ages now. I'd rather eat manure than try and get him to talk about what happened inside his brain because he's just so closed mouth about anything that has to do with her but here goes. Wish me the luck of the Irish. And the Scottish, English, French, Italian and every other nation there is. I think I'm gonna need it! "Hey, Boss, care ta talk about it? Give me some info on that nightmare? I'm assuming that's what it was."

"It's none of your damn business, Taylor!"

See. "The hell it ain't! I find you near deaths door gasping for air and about to keel over like a snapped tree branch and mumbling nonsense so yeah, it's my business! Didn't you hire me ta watch over ya, ta keep your sorry ass safe? So come on Grey, spill the fuckin' beans!"

"Fine. Point well taken. It was about Ana."

"I figured as much. That and Saint Nick day."

Shit! By the sneer on his face I think I've pissed him off. "Who's telling the story?"

"Point well taken, Boss."

"Okay. Yeah, it was at Christmas time and we were getting ready for Teddy and Phoebe's visit. I'm sitting here at my desk and get a Skype message. It's Ana. But then it wasn't Ana. This one was snide and repulsive."

"Nope. Don't sound like our Ana at all."

"Yeah, Took me back some. I could have sworn I was talking to Elena only she was wearing a brown wig. Well Ana let me know the kids weren't coming and, and…she's suing me for divorce. And she didn't love me anymore. Said she and Greg…"

"You mean that playboy?"

"Yes God dammit, the fucking Playboy! Said they've fallen madly in love, wants to leave me for him. Well that son-of-a-bitch will never have her! She's my Ana, not his!"

"Whoa Boss, calm down! You're about to blow another gasket."

"She wanted out. Said our marriage was over, kaput. Wasn't even going to give me a second chance. Threatened to take the kids away if I didn't sign the divorce papers. And oh my God! She claimed I bought Cassie a condo and that she was my mistress! And, that I ignored Teddy on weekends to go fuck my brains out with that bitch. What in the hell ever gave her that idea! None of that's true and you know that Jason!"

"True. Whatever gave her the impression that broad was your fuckbuddy." I think he got the point of my sarcasm. He's redder than a beet.

"She wasn't my mistress, there was no condo or vanilla sex. I'll swear to it on a stack of bibles!"

"I was just kiddin' with ya Boss. Now back to the nightmare."

"You're a real fucking comedian aren't you, Jason. After she said goodbye and left I just sat there in front of the screen. I was a mess. I didn't know what to do but to cry. And I did. Buckets full. I don't know what I was thinking, but I took the computer and threw it across the wall, went to the bookcase and got out this hidden box. The box had a gun in it. A gun? Why would I have a fucking gun hidden in bookcase! I hate guns! Can't even use one. Or so I thought. Anyway, I took the gun and kapow. I shot myself. Right in the head. Proves what a weak bastard I am. Didn't even have the guts to face the fact Ana was leaving me so what do I do? I commit fucking suicide. You heard the gunshot and came in but not in time. Christian had already left the building."

"That was only a nightmare, Boss. Ain't none of it gonna happen."

"So you're a physic now too? You can predict the future?"

"You can be such a jackass at times, like now. Besides, I talked to Luke and Ana had the same nightmare. At the same you did. Strange twist of the old fatebox, huh?"

"Oh great. Terrific. She saw what kind of a weak bastard I am too."

"Will you quit feelin' sorry for yourself you arrogant SOB! Ana was in a bigger state of lala than you and only concerned about one person. And I'm standing right here talking to him."

"What makes you think I'm not concerned about her? I am! So how is she doing? Did Luke tell you? Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's doing fine. Ya know, Ana still cares about you an awful lot. In fact, I'd be willin to bet the lottery she's still crazy in love with you."

"You really think so? Now if only I could get her to forgive me."

"Don't we all."

**AA/N: Am I forgiven? **


	24. Chapter 24

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 24

Suspicions

**A/N: I apologize for the long space between updates. Sorry, but sometimes it can't be helped. So finally here's the next chapter. I hope you enjoy.**

The sight of aqua blue waves rolling onto shore; the gulls on wing; the cold December wind slowly moving the clouds along their way: A beautiful view to help Ana reflect on the past three months. As she stands gazing out the large plate glass window, sipping coffee, memories good and bad come into mind. Some bring smiles while others clench like a fist and bring a tear to the eye. That horrible nightmare of two weeks ago still haunts her; there are evils she has yet to come to terms with for as much as she'd like she still hasn't found the wherewithal to trust Christian again. Not that he hasn't done his God damn hardest to try it's just, well, her silly suspicions get in the way. For example: Was he really in Taiwan for the month of September on business, or banging a few pretty little Taiwanese for pleasure? And then of course that situation with the slut-whore Cassie hasn't helped matters either. Maybe he's right. Maybe Ana IS paranoid! She's beginning to wonder the same too.

Many subjects bring her warmth though like Halloween. Teddy dressed up as Woody from 'Toy Story': That big cowboy hat seemed to devour him. And Phoebe, in a little bumblebee outfit: No cuter bee ever lived. She was considerate enough to email photos to Christian, The Greys, Carla and Ray. All couldn't have been happier to receive them in fact Christian uses the picture as a screensaver for his laptop. Thanksgiving was a good memory too. Spending the day with Trudy and her family… and Greg. Trudy and Ana prepared a marvelous feast. She couldn't have been more proud of the turkey. It turned out perfect: just like the one in a Norman Rockwell painting. Luke did the carving and what an excellent job, too.

And speaking of Greg, Ana's relationship with him has grown stronger. They're much closer than before, deeply fond of each other. Which scares Ana to death. She's conflicted; "How can I have feelings for a man other than Christian?" she constantly argues with her conscience. "It's not right, I shouldn't, but I do. Does that make me a tramp too?" _"Only if you sleep_ _with him honey, and that hasn't happened yet. Not that you don't fantasize about it over and over again. You're safe right now with hugs and kisses."_

There's another reason why Ana is feeling a terrible uneasiness. In a few hours Kate and Mia are coming to visit, spend the day catching up on the happenings of this one and that one, share in the latest 'gossip', yamma, yamma, yamma. Not that she's particularly anxious to hear any of it that is. Then, after time has elapsed, there's nothing more to gab about and the refreshments have run dry the two aunts will take the children back to Seattle to stay a couple of days to spend a little holiday time with their father, grandparents, aunts and uncles. Ana's worried though because part of that atrocious nightmare has become reality.

…

"Oh my God Ana, this place is fabulous!" Oh how she carried on. Shrieks of delight, kisses and hugs, nods of approval and admiration for the beachfront living quarters which is quite a cue considering Mia's so critical about décor. "You must love it here. The view is to die for!"

"Yeah Steele, you've done yourself proud. Very nice."

"Auntie Kate! Auntie Mia!" screams an excited little Teddy upon setting sight of the duo.

Kate's the first to scoop him up in her arms. "Teddy my big man, how are you doing?"

He giggles from the endless tickles he's now mercilessly faced to endure. Mia, never one to be left out gallantly rescues him from his 'cruel' fate. "Hey, what about me? Aren't you happy to see me too?"

Teddy's answer is a big sloppy kiss on her cheek and an exuberant "Yes!"

Ana stands in the background watching her son's interaction with these two women. A huge grin appears on her face, _Hmm, quite the charmer I've_ _raised. Takes after his…_ Yes, quite similar indeed.

"Oh, Ana," asks Kate, straightening out her blue silk blouse, "Where's the baby? We haven't seen little Phoebe in ages."

"She's asleep in her crib. I just put her down not long ago and I don't want to wake her. You see, she's been awfully restless and cranky since yesterday and I checked her temp, it's up a bit so," And here is where nightmare becomes reality: "I'm afraid little Phoebe won't be going back to Seattle with you. Besides, I'm still breastfeeding…"

Kate smirks, and gives Ana a playful nudge. "So, the well ain't dried up yet, ay Steele?"

A childish pout comes to Mia's mouth; She seems the most disappointed. Then a flash of a 'solution' comes to her: "You're always welcome to come back with us. Everyone will love to see you. It'll feel just like a real family Christmas again."

On the surface that sounds like the perfect answer but down deep, no. Ana graciously declined her offer. "Sorry Mia, but that would feel too awkward. And as you say the family is willing accept me again, but I'd still feel like an outsider. I wouldn't enjoy myself. Especially around Christian."

Tiny fingers tug at her pant leg. Two inquisitive gray eyes stare up into her blue. "Mommy, Mommy. Am I still gonna go?"

Oh, does that young guy have a way of pulling at your heartstrings. Just like… "Of course you are my little Teddy Bear. I wouldn't dare think of keeping you away."

Clapping of small hands and a delightful squeal seal the deal. A grab of his Auntie Mia's hand, a request to come and entertain him. He was indeed one happy little camper. And how could Mia resist. Without hesitation they were off to the playroom.

"Oh God I'm glad she's gone." Sighs Kate. "Can we sit down, Ana? I've got something to tell you and I didn't want to say anything in front of Mia."

Confused but mostly perplexed, Ana motions her 'used-to-be-best friend over to the cozy family room, offers her a refreshment which Kate refuses…unless it was hard liquor and not a juice box or iced whatever. "So take a seat. Tell me, what's troubling you that's so secret?"

Kate pauses, admiring the soft blue denim couch. "Well, I'm afraid Elliot is following in his younger brother's footsteps."

Ana tilts her head and furrows her brow in deeper bewilderment. "I don't follow. What do you mean?"

"I'm pretty sure Elliot's having an affair."

…

**Meanwhile, in Seattle**

Mmm, the heavenly aroma of gingerbread: it fills the whole apartment and adds to the joyous ambiance of the holidays. As do the escalating amount of colorful presents under the tree! Gail is so anxious to see the children she's been baking all morning: pies, cupcakes, cookies, you name it. Treats are aplenty for to appease Teddy's sweet tooth.

And if you think 'Martha Stewart' is eager for the children's arrival, then you haven't seen their father. Christian is too excited for words. He's been driving Gail and Jason mad with anticipation since last week. Running, in the early morning hours with his bodyguard and the best friend he's ever had by his side; kickboxing with Claude; nothing can quell his nervous beast. Just imagine his elation: four whole days in which to spoil the kids rotten. If only Ana were to come with them too then his Christmas would truly be merry and bright. Just to see her face again would be enough of a gift. Maybe steal a kiss under some mistletoe. Oh, how he's missed the touch of those soft full lips, the smell of her sweet breath, the sensation of their tongues doing a tango. To hold her close to his body in a tight embrace would be perfection. Making love to her in his bed, being inside her once more, listening to her soft moans; their naked flesh entwined together in the throes of unspeakable passion. Hearing her scream his name as she comes into one mind-blowing climax after another. Waking up the next morning with his arms wrapped snuggly around his lovely wife's warm, smooth body: all too impossible to hope for. But he's never going to give up wishing what's now unfeasible might someday be a wonderful probability. Yes, indeed!

Jason dares to lean up against the kitchen counter, kiss his wife on the cheek and steal an ooey gooey just baked chocolate chip cookie? Scoundrel! Gail smirks at her husband's childlike thievery. "Jason Taylor, what ever am I going to do with you? Stealing cookies like that? Incorrigible!"

"If only you'd just given me one instead then I wouldn't have to resort to a life of crime."

"Ha, ha." she snickers, keeping a watchful eye on the next batch in the oven. "You know, I haven't seen Christian this happy in a long time."

"Yeah, well, that constant damn 'fa la la la la la la-ing' of his is driving me to the loony bin."

"Jason!"

"Hey, a man can only hear 'Jingle Bells' so many times before it starts to sound like fingernails across a chalkboard. And I'm about this close to that point."

"As long as he's in the holiday spirit. That's all that matters to me."

_Ping._ The oven bell goes off alarming Gail the next batch of delectable 'Toll House' are ready. Sneaky Taylor leans over to snatch another cool cookie. With her 'unspatulaed' hand she slaps his; he gives her a wink and slyly munches away which puts a grin on her face. "Any news about that horrible woman?"

"Nah." Taylor shares whipping crumbs from the corners of his mouth, "That Cassie dame is keeping quite the low profile. Ain't done anything out of the ordinary. We've been tailing her for five months and all she does is her normal routine: go to work, out to lunch at noon, then back to that house. And then, some days to that baby doc, but nothing suspicious. Must know those two fellows Martinez and Johnson have been tabbing her the whole time. What bugs the hell out of both the boss and me is we've never been able to keep a trace on her cell phone. Even with that guy Welch's high tech fancy shmancy equipment, and Barney's computer smarts can't seem to do it. When they finally manage to get a hold boom! The next thing ya know it's been blocked. I bet she's got a damn fine nerdy computer genius of her own helping her in that depo."

"That's a shame. Christian could really use some good news regarding that, that…"

"Ana calls her a slut whore."

"A good definition and sums her up perfectly."

The joyous sound of humming has Taylor cringing. Yes, 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer' has just entered the room, a wide smile on his face that touches the corner of his eyes and rubbing his hands in anticipation. "Ho, ho, ho you two! I hope everything is ready for when they get here. I can't wait to see Teddy Bear and my precious Phoebe Bee."

"Ditto Boss. Care for a cookie? Gail just baked them."

Christian forgoes the tasty treat savoring a tangy lemon bar instead. "Mm, mm, mm. The kids are going to love these! How much longer until they get here, Taylor?"

"Hmm, not for several hours."

"Oh." He heaves a heavy sigh, "That's a fucking eternity."

"Yeah, I know. But sorry Boss, you can grumble all you want but I can't speed up time. They get here when they get here."

…

**Back at the beach**

Ana is gob smacked by Kate's suspicion. "What? Elliot? An affair? How do you know? What makes you think so?"

"Well," Kate starts trying valiantly to keep her voice from cracking, "After a night of hot mind-blowing sex you wake up in the morning, fumble around to find your husband's white shirt so you can put it on only to discover it reeks of Ja Dior and not your perfume. Good indication, don't you think?"

"Have you confronted Elliot about it yet? Asked for an explanation?"

"No, not yet. Look, I knew when I met him he had already fucked half of Seattle but I never thought after four years of marriage and one child he'd want to go back and fuck the other half! I, I don't know what to do, Ana. I mean the evidence is there so how can he deny the fact that he's cheating! I'm a mess and you're the only one I can turn to. Please, I need your help and advice…"

Again, Ana is hit for a loop. "Advice? From me? Are you fucking serious! What am I going to advise you on? How to run away from an unfaithful husband? Please, I'm the last person who should give advise to anyone! Especially when it comes to saving relationships or marriages. I mean, look at the disaster mine turned out to be."

"Your and Christian's marriage was not a disaster. If two people were ever meant to be it's you two. You brought out the best in him and he completed you. Look, because of him you grew a backbone. Gone is the sad, wimpy doormat Anastasia that I went through college with. Being around Christian brought out your confidence. And you, you got him to face his insecurities, brought him out of his own personal hell, assured him he could be loved. Without the use of a whip or a cane!" That statement makes Ana blush and both she and Kate break out in giggles. "Believe me, Steele, that's quite a feat. Don't get me wrong though, I still think he's the biggest jackass that ever lived for the shit he put you through. But I've never seen a stronger, more loving union than yours. Not even my own parents. It's just this past year things went to crap." A quiet pause creates awkwardness. Then, in a soft tone so unlike her, Kate asked, "Do you still love Christian?"

A pie in the face: round three. Ana's heartbeat quickens; Her jaw gently falls open and blue eyes grow wide. "Of course I still love Christian! And I always will. Do you still love Elliot?"

"Yes."

"Then you want my advice, here goes: talk to him first, make him aware of what you know. Show him the evidence. Then decide what to do from there. Just don't use me as an example, I did it ass-backwards."

"You think you two will ever get back together?"

"I don't know. Maybe. We'll have to see. In a few weeks, a month. Who knows, maybe never."

"Maybe after the bitch gives birth?"

Ana turns silent; still as a stone statue. Any reference to that woman makes her skin prickle. "May we please change the subject? Let's talk about the weather, favorite books, TV shows, movies; anything besides her!"

Nosy Kate begrudgingly concedes to her friend's wishes and turns the conversation around: light and pleasant, not a bit depressing; enjoyable. About everything and anything. As long as it has nothing to do with lying, cheating husbands, slut whore mistresses, or bastard babies, all is good. Kate though, always the curious romantic, can't help but ask about a certain attractive, young billionaire. "So, what's going on with that blond fox Greg? Anything… you know, happening between the two of you?"

Ana scowls at Kate. That info is way too personal and none of her busybody of a friend's damn business. And certainly not up for discussion! "Nothing." She shrugs, "We're just friends."

The sly, strawberry-blond suspects differently. She's determined to get the truth out of Ana, even if it means wearing her down like a chocolate bar left out in the sun. And if Kate's anything it's persistent!

"Fine. We're just good friends, that's all. Just close friends, nothing more."

But Kavanagh isn't satisfied with this measly tidbit Ana volunteers and won't be until the poor girl's resistance cracks like a fragile egg and out spills the nitty-gritty dirt she assumes to be factual, straight from the filly's own lips. After trying her hardest to resist Ana can't help but fall victim. Out of frustration she throws her hands in the air and caves in. "Okay, okay! I give up! You win. We have very deep feelings for each other. Satisfied?"

You bet! From the smug grin on her face that exasperated acknowledgement is just what Kate was hoping to hear! "Ooo," she rubs her hands in glee, "Competition for the Seattle CEO, huh? So tell me Steele, have you two uh, done it between the sheets yet?"

A sock in the jaw wouldn't have left such an impact: stunner #four. "What? Kate, why would you…" A stern irritation forms in her whole manner of being. "The answer is a definite no! Despite the rumors, Greg is too much of a gentleman. He would never even think of taking advantage of me like that. Not that I haven't fantasized about it enough! Doing it on his boat, in his Bentley. Getting it on hot and heavy in his pl…" Ana immediately regrets her informative rambling. Her cheeks burn redder than a pomegranate. "Oh, my God," she groans, "I sound like a horny old tramp."

A mischievous smirk grows on her sister-in-laws lips. "No you don't. You sound like a woman who needs to be laid. And right now! And Greg sounds like just the man to make your fantasies come true. Go for it Steele, take that stud and ride him like there's no tomorrow! Shit, I bet he's a fantastic fuck!"

"Shut. Up. Kate!" Comes a defensive command. Mostly out of confusion and fright for if asked she might not be all that hesitant to comply. "I have principles. I have dignity. I will not lower myself to the same level as my cheating husband."

"It would be sweet revenge. Give the bastard a taste of his own medicine and see how he likes it."

"Fuck you, Kate!"

This friendly yet, sarcastic banter comes to a halt when a trio tired of playing X-box and Legos enters the room. Teddy runs to his aunt anxious to take her for a walk on the beach and how could she say no to those pleading gray eyes. Which couldn't make Mia happier. While Teddy, Kate and Luke head for the sandy shoreline, the younger Grey waits until after they're safely out of earshot to nervously approach her sister-in-law. "Ana, I need to talk to you and I didn't want to say this in front of Kate."

Oh Lord, what now. Who do these Grey women think she is? A priest? A psychiatrist? An advice columnist! She motions her to the couch and they sit. "Okay," she sighs, "Shoot."

"I'm pregnant."

Whoa! The fifth shocker of the day! "Uh, I guess, congratulations? Does Ethan know?"

"Why should he? It's not his."

"Excuse me?"

"Ethan and I broke up months ago. He, he let me know he didn't want a committed relationship and left me. I was devastated and fled to a place where I felt secure. I went back to France."

Ana takes a few minutes to soak up this scenario and realizes how fortunate she is to be far away from Seattle and oblivious to this Grey family soap opera. "Oh. And then what happened?"

"I was sitting in a little bistro, healing my wounded pride and accidentally bumped into an old boyfriend of mine, Pascal Beauchiarde. He was just what I needed, someone to hold me, put my arms around, tell me I'm that someone special, that he never stopped thinking of me. Coincidence I always felt the same about him. Needless to say, we rekindled our romance and became even closer than we were before. I gotta tell you that Pascal is one hot lover! What we did each time we made love, Lord, would put the Kamma Sutra to shame. Why, we even invented our own positions!"

Picturing Mia as a sweaty, naked contortionist in the throes of an orgasm is too much for Ana to bear. "Ewww, TMI Mia, TMI! I get it already. Just get to the point and by that I don't mean his penis. Which, by the way from what you're implying must be enormous."

From the mischievous grin on Mia's face Ana's assumption is correct. "Well, I didn't want to leave France and he didn't want me to leave. It was so sad at the airport when we had to say goodbye, just like an angsty movie scene. I left him with the promise I'd return and he told me he'd be waiting for me with open arms when I do. Anyway, imagine my surprise after a month of my return to discover I'm carrying Pascal's baby."

Funny, Ana can't help but recall mentally how Mia's situation has a few similarities to hers of seven months ago: Both had to leave a place they were comfortable in, then find out much later they've been knocked up by former lovers. "Have you told anyone else in the family your news like, oh, for instance your mother, Grace maybe? Or am I the first. What are your plans? Are you going to keep the baby? Move back to France? Tell the father to start stocking up on cigars and infant diapers? Surely you've thought about these things."

"The answers are nope, no one else, yes you are, don't know for sure, yes, I am because I'm anti abortion, I hope so, I should but I'm not quite sure of what his reaction might be. Parenthood was never in the picture for us, it never came up and I'm afraid he's gonna freak when he finds out."

"Hmp. Does that ever sound fifty shades familiar. Mia, what's the problem? If you and this Frenchman love each other the way you say you do then by all means, go back to France and be with him. Whether he likes it or not he's going to be expecting a little bundle of joy. But please, tell the family first that they're going to be grandparents, aunts and uncles. Hell, I bet Grace will go out of her way to find you the best OB/GYN there is."

The mother-to-be rolls her eyes, "Probably. That's so mother."

A soft disturbance is heard from the baby monitor sitting on the side table near the lamp. "Sounds like fussy Phoebe has awoken from her nap. Best go check on her. Want to come with me?"

There is no need to ask twice. Mia is more than willing to comply. She readily follows Ana to the nursery and the sight of the young one awake in the crib makes her shine. Tears of elation come to her eyes, "Ana, she's so beautiful!"

"Here hold her for me." Ana picks her daughter up and goes to place her carefully in Mia's arms. "Every expectant mother needs practice."

The timid aunt is rather reluctant to accept her niece but once safely held close to her heart Mia's whole attitude changes. She beams with pride and coos at the smiling, giggling child, whose tiny hand reaches out to touch in acknowledgement, her adoring relation. A sudden offensive odor becomes apparent which causes Mia's nose to crinkle and the infant quickly ends up back in her mother's arms. "I uh, I think little Phoebe here needs changing."

There's a chuckle and a smirk from Ana. "You want to come help me? Get acquainted with the procedure?"

Again she's apprehensive. "No thanks. I, uh, I… think I'll pass." Ana insistence has Mia thinking twice. "But I, I guess I should, huh."

So she observes with interest (and tries not to gag) as the dirty diaper becomes history and the nasty scent turns baby powder sweet. "Hmm. Not as difficult a process as I thought."

A wail of discontent comes forth from the wee one. "Sounds like our cranky princess is hungry. Now you can feed her, Mia."

Wide-eyed and petrified she quickly resists Ana's offer. "Uh, no. Nope, I think not." Even vigorous head shaking is not enough of a refusal for the tot's mother to accept. "I, I suppose I should try, huh."

A comfortable seat in a living room chair; a warm bottle in her hand and Mia begins the challenge. She gasps in surprise at how easily baby Phoebe takes hold and starts sucking. This wasn't as hard as she imagined. Ana grins at the sight of the duo. "Mia, you're a natural. Believe me, you're going to make a wonderful mother."

"I hope so." She whispers back.

The sound of boisterous chatter and gritty footsteps trudging up the stairs brings to awareness the three absent beach-bums have now returned from their seaside trek. No matter how hard she tries to brush them away stray particles of sand remain on Kate's clothes causing her a fit of irritability; grumbling to the point of language unsuitable for Teddy's innocent ears. She enters, her nephew's hand held tightly in hers followed by Luke bringing up the rear. The lively four-year-old shows no signs of weariness but she looks exhausted. Her attention focuses on the family room where her sister-in-law and niece sit absorbed in their own personal time and space, oblivious of the return. The charming scene brings a smile to Kate's face as well as a characteristic witty remark. "Well, looky at what we have here, Ana. It's Mamma Mia! Wow I'm impressed. She handles that baby well. I imagine it's good experience for when she has one of her own. I mean look at her. It's as if she's a mother already."

Ana resists a chuckle. This gal to her right has no idea how accurate her statement is. "Yes, I know. Amazing isn't it?"

Where, oh where has the afternoon gone? Time for departure comes too quickly for Ana, but for Teddy it's a trip he's looked forward to and can't wait to leave for Seattle and spend the next four festive days with his daddy and the others. Luke carries the youngster's items out to the rented Mercedes escaping the abundance of hugs, and kisses, and goodbye waves. Ana leans against the closed door and sighs. They're gone. Kate and Mia have left. Finally. But so has her baby boy. For that she feels a great emptiness not to mention unwarranted fret. Luke steps in hoping clear away her nervous tension. "Ana, there's no need to worry, you know Teddy's in safe hands. Besides, it does him good to be with his dad every now and then. Christmas is one of the best times for a visit. Sure, The Grey's are bound to spoil him rotten and he'll get his fill of sweet goodies courtesy of Gail and gifts galore. But that's par for the holiday season. So try to relax, will you? Chill out. Take the time to enjoy yourself a little. He'll be back before you know it."

"Oh, I'm not as worried about Teddy. I'm worried about the two adults accompanying him. Turns out their lives are just as fifty shades fucked up as mine! I still cannot believe they came to me wanting advice! That makes as much sense as a barber at a baldhead convention. Ri-dic-u-lous."

"Maybe they couldn't get appointments with Flynn," jokes Luke. "And you happened to be convenient."

"If that be the case I should have charged for my time. No, I thank my lucky stars every day that I'm clueless in California and not privy to the mess in Seattle. Thank you, Luke. I am eternally grateful."

…

**Somewhere in Seattle**

Colorful twinkling lights adorn the white picket fence. A lovely holiday wreath hangs on the door. Inside, a few decorations exist but not many. A small, decorated 'Charlie Brown' tree sits on a table near the family room window, a few presents underneath. A flat screen TV is turned to Project Runway by a flick of a receiver held in the hand of a very pregnant woman sitting on a white leather couch. "Hey, Where is Abby? Isn't she supposed to be home by now?"

"I don't know. Maybe had a late class or something. She'll show up. Here, have some cider."

"Did you get a hold of that gal?" asks Ms. Bun-in-the-oven as she accepts the hot drink from her sister.

"No, but I left a message. So, hopefully she calls back soon."

The woman on the couch squirms in her seat in an effort to find comfort. "Do you really think she'll go along with the plan? Give us the money?"

"Beats me. I haven't seen or spoken to her in over two years so I don't know. I do know she loves Master just as much as I do and hates that bitch he's married to. Has always wanted to see their marriage end. And thanks to us it almost is. She left him because of those pictures and hasn't been see around Seattle for months. Probably never will come back once the baby's born. I bet she divorces him so fast it'll make your head spin. Then he'll be all ours."

"You mean yours don't you? I hope so." She winches, "My back is killing me! I can't wait to push this brat out! This is when I regret being talked into your revenge plan, Sis. The next three weeks are going to be pure hell. They better fly by quickly because I can't wait to get back to New York and return to my normal life!"

**AA/N: Whoa! So what do you think? Hey, if anyone has a suggestion for the story I'd love to hear it. So send me a PM if you do. I always welcome my readers and fans opinions. I want to thank all of you too. You guys rock! **


	25. Chapter 25

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 25

Visits and Visitors

**A/N: I know it's been a lonnnnng time since I've updated so I've written a lonnnnng chapter to make up for it. I started writing and couldn't stop. So please, I hope you like it. **

**Teddy**

I've had the bestest time with Daddy! Better than super! We had so much fun! Daddy and me and Uncle Elliot and Uncle Jason and Granpa, we made a snowman. I got to put an old hat of Granpa's on top of the snowman's head. And when Aunt Mia came out she wasn't happy. She said it was not fair to just have a snowman so we made a snowlady too. She got an old apron from Aunt Gail, an old blue scarf of Aunt Kate's and a big floppy hat from Gramma. They looked so awesome! Then we had a snowball fight. Uncle Elliot won. And Daddy and I had fun making snow angels.

The food was awesome too. All the cookies and candy and stuff, wow. And Aunt Gail sure is a good cook. Her macaroni and cheese is the best in the world. Even better than Mommy's! But I'm not suppose to tell her that. She might get sad.

Each night we sat and drank apple cider. Daddy played the piano and sang Christmas carols too. Gramma looked so happy, too; kept mumbling about him having the voice of an angel. Do all angels sound like Daddy?

One night Daddy told me I had to go to bed early because Santa was going to come. I said no because it wasn't Christmas Eve. He only comes on Christmas Eve. But Daddy told me he had a talk with him and so Santa's gonna make a special trip just for me. And he did! I got so many presents that I had to leave some of them behind so when I visit next time.

This morning I got so many kisses and hugs goodbye and Christmas wishes too. Granpa and Gramma looked so unhappy that I was going. But I told them I'd be back soon and gave her a big sloppy kiss. She really liked that.

So Daddy, Uncle Jason and I are just about to land back home again. I love flying in Daddy's plane. Someday I wanna fly one too. I look out of the window can see Mommy and Uncle Luke waiting for me. I wave at them but I guess they can't see me 'cause they didn't wave back. But they know I'm on the plane.

I can't wait to see Mommy and Luke and tell them all about my trip. I wish someone would open the big plane door faster because…

"Mommee!"

…

**Waiting at the airport…**

"Teddy Bear!" Ana scoops her jolly little Christmas elf up high in the air and into her arms as if he weighed nothing at all. Even more hugs and more kisses. "God I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too."

"So have I." The sound of Christian's deep, smooth voice startles Ana; takes her aback. Thrills her even: Way deep down in her core. "Merry Christmas, Ana."

An unexpected vision in a deep green T shirt, dark blue denim Levys a matching windbreaker and designer sunglasses, and standing as sexy as a male runway model, is the one giving Ana holiday greetings… and making her heart twitter faster than a hummingbird's wings. She smiles coyly, and in a voice warm and friendly she responds back, "Merry Christmas, Christian."

He removes his sunglasses and swaggers over in a way that could make a woman swoon and possibly faint. Ana, too. He smiles back and eyes her up and down, "You, you look wonderful."

She sets Teddy down and starts to reply. Their eyes meet: iris blue to silver gray. That same old electric spark is still there, the wanting; the yearning… the angst. His smell: clean, fresh, manly with a hint of pumpkin spice and pine brings back such sensual longing. The desire to put her hands on his massive chest is strong… and her resistance is weakening. "So do you."

Little hands give a tug on their clothing, "Mommy, Daddy, will you do something for me?"

"Anything, Sweetie." Answers Ana.

"Kiss."

His request surprises them both but in an undeniably pleasant way. They can't let their child down, can they? So Ana and Christian bashfully grant the tikes wish: A quick, light kiss on the lips.

But the sly little matchmaker isn't satisfied. He shakes his head, "No, not like that! A Mommy and Daddy kiss."

What an unsuspected demand from the mouth of their babe. Wide eyes look stunned at each other, glance over at him, then at each other again. A big swallow; a deep breath; a slight shrug and a hesitant obey. Warm, soft lips meet in a kiss both have longed for: passionate, full of wanting. The urge to run her fingers through his shaggy copper hair is huge; the craving to crush her against his chest in a hard embrace and never let her go is such an irresistible temptation. They are lost in the moment and of times that seem like ages ago.

Teddy stands with a smile on his face joyfully witnessing his parents 'rekindled affection'.

Suddenly the harsh memories and images of her husband's infidelity flow like a tidal wave into her mind hence ruining what was so beautiful. She pulls back confused, terrified and regretful. How could she have surrendered her emotions to him so easily! She doesn't know whether to curse herself or slap him. "Come, Teddy," she says with embarrassment and a bit like she swallowed an ice cube, "We've got to go now. Say goodbye to your father."

Christian is bewildered at Ana's abrupt change of behavior. "Ana, what's wrong? What…"

But all he receives in return is the silent treatment. And wonders why. But deep down inside suspects the reason. Thus answering his self-query. What he considered a wonderful Christmas gift has been crushed to nothing. As is he: A crestfallen soul watching as the love he didn't mean to betray and hopes someday soon to win back walks away. With a heavy heart he hangs his head and retreats back to the plane. _What a fucking fool I am. Ho ho,_ _fucking ho. Tis the season. Yeah. Sure. Fucking right._

Ana herself with her son in tow walks briskly toward the car, shaking her head and detesting her actions. _What a fucking fool I was! Idiot! Why the fuck did I do that? Merry_ _Christmas? Yeah, fucking right!_

_Why are you in such denial Ana? You loved it! You fucking loved it!_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. Quit reminding me, okay? Fucking dumbass!_

…

**The next day: In Seattle**

At GEH the holiday season is very apparent. A huge, white and gold tree stands right in view as you walk through the front sliding glass doors; holly boughs with large red bows, pine cones and poinsettias decorate throughout the lobby and offices. Festive music plays in the background. The staff is all abuzz over the Christmas party taking place at the end of the day. Everyone is full of happiness and good cheer… except for the boss.

Grumpy Christian sits alone in his office, behind his desk, staring at his computer and totally engrossed in business at hand; couldn't care less about the Yule-time season. The sound of a buzz breaks through the depressing silence. "Mr. Grey," alerts Andrea in a voice joyous and bright, "There's someone here to see you."

"Who is it?" he growls.

"A Mrs. Thornton Robinson."

_Who?_ "Tell them I'm too busy."

"But she says it's very important. She must speak with you."

_Oh, for God… _"Fine," he grumbles, "Show her in."

His office door opens; the clipping of Louboutin heels and the scent of a familiar perfume are clues to the mystery woman's identity. Her voice is a giveaway too: smooth and sultry. "Merry Christmas, Christian."

"Well," he answers without looking up from the computer screen, "What brings you back into town after two years, Elena. Reno had enough of you and threw you out?"

"Hardly." She smirks, and tosses her long platinum blond hair over her shoulders.

"Thank God. So, what's with the new name?"

"You like it? Ironic I would end up marrying a man with the last name of 'Robinson'. Have been for almost a year now. Thor and I are very happy."

"Goody, goody. So how'd you end up trapping the poor shmuck?"

"I'll tell you if you start acting like a gentleman and ask me to sit down."

"Fine." He sneers and points to the black suede chair across from him, "Park your ass down and start talking."

"Christian, that's no way to speak to a lady!"

"True, but I don't see a lady in this room."

Elena laughs and sits down smoothing out the lap of her ivy green Prada dress. "You're such a charming kidder. Okay, since you're so fascinated to know how I met my husband here goes. After I left Seattle two years ago because I had finally had enough of being considered a long-suffering affection-starved thorn in your side I took whatever self-respect I had left and moved back to my real home, Reno. That's where I was raised. Also where I met and made the worst decision in my life which was to marry that shithead Linc. Anyway, I decided to start up a business and Thor went into partnership with me. Sound familiar? Turns out Reno, is the perfect place for a BDSM club. You wouldn't believe how many people enjoy the lifestyle there. I even named the club in honor of you, Christian, 'The Red Room'. "

"W-h-o-o-p-y." He remarks dourly, "I'm touched."

"Thank you. I knew you would be. So, we have a lot in common, Thor and I. For example, we're both Dominates and ours exes are assholes. Well, soon after staring the business, and by the way it's a tremendous success, he proposed and we got married. Ta da. End of story."

"Finally! So please tell me Elena, why are you here in my office and not using a tinsel flogger with your Sadist hubby."

"Because. Though I would rather be home with my own Santa Baby playing with his nice big set of 'Christmas' balls, I still care very much about your happiness." She watches as Christian roll of his eyes signifying he'd only believe that if porkers grew feathers. "So tell me, what happened between you and Ana?"

His long fingers grip the arms of his chair, "It's none of your Goddamn business!" He hisses.

"You got that right! It IS none of my frickin' business. But when I come home from a nice, peaceful vacation in the Cayman Islands with Thor and find twenty-four messages on my answering machine and seventeen emails all wanting me to go into a 'great plan' to keep you and Ana apart it tweaked my curiosity one hundred percent. So again, I want to know what the hell you did to cause Ana to leave?"

"Why are you assuming it's my fault?" he challenges indignantly.

A furrow of pencil thin brows, a smirk on ruby red painted lips and sarcasm dripping from these three little words, "Well, isn't it? True, I may not have liked her at the beginning but Ana's put up with a lot of crap from you and for that feat alone she's one of the strongest women I've ever known. In fact I admire her for her tenacity. And Lord knows she loved you too much to just take off without a good reason. So I'll ask again, and you better tell me the truth, what the fuck did you do?"

"Careful, Elena. That's no way for a lady to talk."

"So," she flutters her eyelashes, "You admit I am a lady after all?"

Christian scowls, writhing uneasy in his chair, glaring, gnashing his teeth and weighing the pros and cons of relaying to this nosy irritant the details of the mired landfill his private life has become. "Fine! But first tell me who it was that called you."

"Sounds fair enough. Leila."

"LEILA!"

"Exactly my reaction. I haven't seen or spoken to her for God knows how long. Then out of the blue she tries to contact me? Serves me right for not having the sense to change my cell phone number before I left. Hell, I bet that psycho lampshade wasn't even aware I _had_ left."

"What the fuck did she have to say, Elena?"

"I will tell you it had something to do with a half-ass crazy plan that she and her sister cooked up. But before I'll tell you more I want to know what caused you and Ana to go 'splitsville'. So, go on, Christian, it's your turn now. Because me thinks you got a lot of 'splainin' to do."

"Wait, her sister?"

"Yeah, someone named Cassie. Christian, I'm waiting, spill."

He pales at the name. And to think, the bitch is Leila's sister? That fact alone makes him feel even more of a jerk than before. He stares down at his desktop half in horror, half in shame. _Oh, Christ. I fucked Leila's sister. I'm __such a stupid dumbshit!_

"Christian?"

Exhaling a deep breath he gives in. "It's like this. Our marriage was going through a bad spell. We were fighting all the time. Intimacy was seldom if ever. We were growing apart instead of together. I guess I was jealous of her success and the attention she was giving our son. I felt left out. And Ana was in denial that anything was wrong. I tried to talk to her about it several times but the discussion always turned into an argument. No use getting angry, that only made matters worse. I felt I was losing control, Elena, of my marriage, of Ana…of my business. Yeah, GEH was in a rough spot too. So I tried to find solace in the bottom of a glass. I started drinking."

"Oh, Christian, no." she groans in disappointment, "You didn't."

"Yep, Each night after work I go and drown my sorrows which to be honest didn't help the situation one damn bit. That's where I met her."

"Leila's sister."

"Uh huh. Cassie. Cassandra Zane."

"Cassandra Zane?" The name piques her interest and she pauses in recollection. "Why does that name sound so familiar?" I know I've heard it before I… Never mind, please, go on. I'll think of it later."

"One night she came up to the bar and sat next to me. God she smelled good. And looked like a million bucks. Reminded me of Ana. We started talking and it felt great to have a nice quiet conversation with someone. In a way, it was cathartic. Well, each night she'd be there in the same spot and we'd talk, simply talk. And I won't lie to you the thought did occur to me but I resisted the temptation. No use putting my marriage into more jeopardy than it already was. Then one night while we were talking the subject of BDSM came up. From her, not by me."

"Didn't you think that was a might coincidental seeing as you used to be in the lifestyle?"

"Maybe," he shrugs, "A little. I don't know. I guess I was too buzzed at the time to even care. So anyway, turned out one of her best friends from work dabbled in the lifestyle and had always wanted her to try it out but she just wasn't interested. But now she changed her mind. Told me I seem perfect for the lifestyle too because I act so confidant and demanding. Even thought I'd make a good Dominant."

Elena's skepticism shows. "Whoa. Time out. Let me see if I've got this correct. This woman said you'd be perfect for the lifestyle and make a good Dominant even though she quotes she's never experienced BDSM, never even been interested in it before, knows nothing about it except what she's learned from her work buddy. Didn't you think it sounded a little suspicious for her to make such a knowledgeable statement if she hasn't a clue what she's talking about. And why would she say a thing like that? Because, of your confidence. Which I doubt she's never witnessed because she'd only seen you in a lamenting, self-worth-is-in-the-toilet drunken state of mind! Yeah, I can see how being that pitiful would exhume an aura of poise and assuredness. And sorry, Christian, just because you insisted the barkeep, keep 'em shots acomin isn't exactly proof you'd be a demanding force to be reckoned with. And how would she know what a good Dominant looked like anyway if she's never seen one before. Why, some of the best Doms in the business don't look anything like you! Polar opposites in fact! She's either a phony, or a fraud who took you for a ride. Knowing you like I do your ego probably slurped up that patty-assing like a glass full of Scotch. Did you end up admitting in your past participation?"

He did more fidgeting, more running nervous fingers though his hair, more cringing from Elena's accurate assessments. " Yes, I did." He confesses with disgust, a heavy sigh, "And she was delighted and relieved to hear it because she'd been wanting to learn the art of submission and hadn't found anyone yet who could teach her. Since I had the experience and know-how she wanted to know if I wouldn't mind being her instructor. And before you ask me, I said no, that it was a part of my past I didn't care to revisit again. Naturally she was disappointed by my refusal but understood. Then I excused myself and left. Went out to the car and sat in the backseat, which got me thinking about the playroom and how I was always in such control in there and how good it felt, and how I yearned to feel that way again: in control. The longer I sat there the stronger the desire grew. Those damn fucking urges started to resurface again, the ones I thought I had buried six feet under. It got to the point they consumed me until I couldn't resist any longer and I made Taylor turn the car around and drive me back to the bar. I went back in, found her and… accepted her proposal which now that I think about it was the worse, most contemptible act of weakest on my part. Ever."

"I can't believe that you, Christian Grey could be so gullible! So where'd you hold classroom. At Escala?"

"No, at a discreet out-of-the-way hotel that she knew of on the outskirts of town. I'd take items from my playroom and that's where for two, three times a week for two weeks I taught her Submission 101. Then, I… I… I made her my submissive."

Such a shocking revelation has Elena springing like a jack-in-the-box from her seat. Thank heaven the office is soundproof for Elena wasn't rendered speechless. Her booming exclamation: "WHAT!" could easily have shattered glass. "What the fuck got into you, Christian! Making that bitch your submissive and then keeping her a secret from Ana? You disgusting piece of shit you! How long did this arrangement go on for?"

Elena's wrath keeps pounding down causing him to feel like just what she said: a huge pile of cow manure. "Two months." He answers like a cowering schoolboy, "At Escala."

"You. Worm. I don't blame Ana for leaving your sorry ass then!" That smoldering glare; those perfectly, manicured fingernails are ready to shred his guilty gray eyes to bits. "I bet you had no intention of telling Ana either. So, how did she find out?"

"Someone send her incriminating photographs that were taken without my knowledge…"

"Probably taken at that out-of-the-way hotel she suggested no doubt. Smells like a setup to me! Jackass! So where did Ana run off to? Or do you know?"

"California. Of course we more than likely wouldn't have known her whereabouts if she hadn't have gone into premature labor three months later. That's right Elena, Ana was pregnant when she took off her wedding rings and said "adios" taking Teddy with her. In case you're wondering, I have a daughter now named Phoebe Grace."

"Well, at least that's one baby I can congratulate you on."

Christian grumbles wondering how many more disparaging remarks he's going to receive before he throws her out of his office. But he wants to hear what she knows of the plan first.

Just then the melody, 'I've Had the Time of my Life' is heard coming from Elena's purse. She rushes to grab her Blackberry and smiles when she see's the call is from her husband. "Hey, Thor. Yes, I'm still here talking with Christian. Uh, huh. I wonder if you can't do me a favor. Does the name Cassandra Zane sound familiar to you? It's been bugging me all day… what? Are you sure? Well, I'll be damn. Yeah, thanks. See you tonight. Bye." She slowly closes her Blackberry and sticks it back inside her purse, then folds her arms across her chest and stares. "Christian, this student of yours, Cassandra Zane, was she a quick learner?"

A wary question mark appears over his head, "Yeah, why? What are you trying to tell me Elena?"

"Just this, Christian. That Cassie gal of yours, she's not from the Seattle area, she's from New York. She's a notorious Manhattan dominatrix who goes by the name of Lady Caszee. Yep, I hate to say this my pet but it looks as if you've been duped. Duped and suckered and taken like Grant took Richmond."

There are no words to describe Christian's utter shock and humiliation. He can't think of a single one either. His eyes are blank; his face void of color. What sits behind the desk now is a mummified version of a powerful CEO. When he does retain the ability of speech there are only four words he can think to growl. "I'm gonna kill Welch!"

"Don't go murdering your staff yet. There's no way he could have found that kind of information out. It's not in the public records she's in to BDSM any more than in yours or in mine. And as far as her being related to that halfwit Leila, who knows if they even are."

Feeling like he'd been trampled on by reindeer and frustrated to boot he leans across his desk as Elena sits back down. "So, tell me about this plan those two cooked up and why they wanted to involve you."

She gets comfortable in her seat and crosses her legs. "That _was_ the plan, Christian. To have Cassie cozy up to you at the bar, be your friend and confidant then lure you back into a life of BDSM. Then, she'd have an affair with you. Ana would find out about it, leave you then file for divorce. I honestly didn't believe Leila when she told me that her scheme actually worked. Boy, was she elated that you fell for it hook, line, and sinker and that Ana had left. I still don't know how she found out your marriage was suffering but yet again, rumors do have a habit of flying." Elena pauses to catch a breath. "Did you know Leila the twit has never gotten over you? Still refers to you as 'Master'. Still detests Ana even more than I used to. Anyway, as thrilled she was with Ana's departure she was not so much for the fact you two were still married. So, she devised a second part of her plan. Which, quite frankly, makes no sense to me whatsoever and I doubt much concern or thought was given to the innocent little party that's soon to be involved. Leila's fruit basket of a mind came up with this little gem: what better way to get Ana permanently out of the picture _and_ your life would be if Cassie had your illegitimate child. When Ana found out you impregnated the last woman you shoved that dick of yours into she'd snap and say enough is enough, be unable to deal with the result of your infidelity and finally serve you with those divorce papers."

Christian can't fathom how effectively he'd let himself be conned. By of all people… Leila. "Well I've got to hand it to Leila the first part worked like a charm. Serves me right for being so fucking gullible. But the second part is… well, pretty damn incredulous. There's no way that baby could be mine. I made it a point to always use protection, especially in the playroom. Which by the way, was the only place I was ever with Cassie."

"I believe you. No vanilla. But I also know how hard you fuck and condoms don't last forever. But here's a little something Leila let slip out that you might want to consider very carefully before professing 'baby not mine'."

"And what is that?"

"Leila claims Cassie stole your sperm."

The poor befuddled bastard practically fell out of his chair. This seems too crazy to be true. Then so was Leila. "She did what? That's impossible. There's no way. Is there?"

"Actually… yes. I Googled it last night. Sperm can last twenty minutes up to an hour if taken under the right conditions. If it's true and Cassie did steal them she must have had herself inseminated. Then there is a fifty/fifty chance you might think about breaking out the cigars."

That poor hair of Christian's is sure taking a beating. He paces in anger and denial. "No, no. I don't believe it. It's a trick, a scam, a con-job. It's too incredible, too far-fetched too imagine. It's got to be someone else's sperm, not mine. That's it! It's some other schmucks sperm and they're trying to convince me that in mine. Well they're not going to get away…" He sinks back down in is chair in sad realization. "Shit. If it's true and that baby is mine there's no way Ana will come back to me. Leila will have won. Did she happen to mention how Cassie achieved this feat?"

"Sorry," she says shaking her head, "Loony Leila's lips weren't that loose. But hey, if it is factual and Cassie did actually steal your sperm, you can have her and Leila arrested."

Ah, a ray of light shines through that muddled mess of a mind. "You're right. I can. For theft."

"Not to mention fraud, aiding and abetting and… kidnapping."

Christian's curiosity becomes piqued. "Kidnapping?" Seriously? Are you sure about that?"

"Yep, very. Thor told me. Oh, did I not mention he's an ex-judge?"

"No." he says folding his arms across his chest, "Just like you haven't mention your involvement in this fiasco my life is turning into."

"That's because I'm not, Christian. I'm not involved one bit. All I did was answer my telephone yesterday and listen to Leila proudly boast about her accomplishments. She must have though I still carried a torch for you and would be ecstatic over the results. But I'm not. And that's why I'm here. I didn't know if you already knew, and it looks as if you didn't, so I felt I owed you the consideration, that you deserved to know the information I was privy to yesterday. This whole situation you've gotten yourself into was a set-up. Deliberate, intentional, premeditated, all to break you and Ana apart."

"I knew it!" he exclaims pounding his fists on his desk, "I had a feeling this has been nothing but a frame-up, so has Taylor. We've been following Cassie's whereabouts for five months but she never does anything what you'd call suspicious. We've tried to track her cellphone but that's been impossible. When we finally latch on to a signal it's like bam, we lose it. It's been a nightmare, a whole fucking pain-in-the-ass nightmare."

"But I'm sorry, there's just something about this work of revenge that doesn't seem quite kosher to me."

"Yeah? And what's that?"

"Why would a New York Domme come all the way out to the West Coast to be part of Leila's plan? And why would she volunteer to spend nine months out of her life incubating what might be your young? And just what is the connection between the two of them that would make her want to readily participate. That's what I don't understand. There's got to be other pieces of this puzzle, Christian. I only wish I knew. Maybe you pissed somebody off who lives back East?"

"Who the hell knows!" he heaves with exasperation, " Sure beats the shit out of me."

With the grace of a gazelle Elena rises and grabs ahold of her purse. "Well, I should get on my way. Sorry if I ruined your Christmas, Christian. That wasn't my intention. I just thought you should know this, that's all."

Even a man who now feels the thrill of liberation can act like a gentleman. And that is Christian. He too rises, ready to escort his visitor out. "I want you to know how much I appreciate your thoughtfulness, Elena. You can't imagine the relief it is to find out my suspicions have been justifiably correct. I also want to apologize for my behavior earlier. Can't help the doubting asshole in me anymore."

She chuckles the way to the elevator, "You have no need to apologize. I guess knowing our past history I sort of deserved it. But I've moved on. I'm not the 'bitch-troll' any longer." She glances down at the diamond watch her husband gave her for her birthday, "Oh, I really do have to get a move on. I have a date tonight to jingle Thor's balls and whip him with a candy cane. Take care now Christian. I do hope you and Ana can work it out. You really do belong together."

The elevator closes and Christian turns to meander back into his office, hands stuffed inside his pockets, ignoring the festive ambiance. "So do I," he mumbles, "So do I."

…

**That evening at the beach**

There's something about Christmas that's undeniably irresistible. Especially when young ones are around. One house that surely captures the holiday spirit is the beachhouse: Every square inch tells you 'Santa Clause is coming to town.' It may be a different kind of winter wonderland than in Seattle, but a holiday atmosphere just the same.

It's six thirty in the evening. Ana's in her bathroom finishing her makeup: simple, fresh, not overdone. Her natural beauty doesn't require much. She gives herself a once over in the mirror. Yes. Flawless. The dark maroon evening dress she bought for this occasion is perfect: short, hugs her figure in all the right places, dips down in the back exposing her beautiful creamy skin. In the front there's just a modest hint of cleavage. And the Jimmy Choos complete the ensemble to a tee. All in all, Ana looks smoking hot! She'll be the Belle of the Christmas Ball tonight.

Ah, from the sound in the family room her date has arrived: right on time, too. She grabs her shawl and clutch and heads out and no surprise: Even Luke can't help but to 'wolf whistle'. Neither can her date. And he looks absolutely breathtaking: an Adonis looking ever so gorgeous in his black Armani tuxedo.

"Ana, you look fabulous." He exclaims, with wide-eyed delight.

Blushing at the compliments, she tosses one back, "You're not so bad yourself, Greg." Ooo, what a flirt our Ana is.

Even Teddy gets into the act: "Mommee, you look aweswome!" which garners a kiss and hug for such appreciated praise.

After saying goodnight to Teddy and Luke (leaving instruction about bedtime for the younger), she grabs the arm that her charming companion holds out for her and they head off in the fresh night air toward the waiting horse-powered carriage: a silver Rolls Royce. "I am so glad you decided to accept my invitation. I hate going to these kinds of functions alone."

"Well I'm glad you invited me. It's nice to get out of the house once in awhile. And I think I know what you mean about showing up solo." Garrett, the chauffer, holds the car door open for her and as carefully as possible so none of her underneath secrets will accidentally be revealed, she slides onto the backseat next to Greg. Wow he smells good: fresh, aquatic, with a slight hint of citrus. She simply has to ask him the fragrance. Which he is very happy she finds pleasing: Dolce and Gabbana Light Blue. Mmm, she thinks she could definitely get use to waking up next to a man who smelled like that! Uh, oh. This _ping _of arousal she's feeling scares her to death. "So," she asks nervously, "Where are we going?"

"To my parents estate. They throw this fund-raiser every year. It's for a cause that's near and dear to our family: Hearts Sharing Hope. They started the charity in memory of my sister who died of ALS. The money raised goes for research and to help families with loved ones suffering from the decease. Especially those who haven't the financial resources available to afford the much needed medical care that's required."

"Sounds like a very worthwhile cause."

"Yes. A lot of money gets raised from this event. Marilyn would be proud."

The mood turns from melancholy to pleasurable with amusing conversation that brings laughter and smiles to their faces. Memories start to spring through Ana's mind though of the similar galas held at Bellevue and those pleasant times with Christian (not to mention the orgasmic trips to his childhood bedroom and the boathouse). But those recollections are leaving her with conflicted feelings. _Jeez stop it, will you! What's wrong with me?_ _Quit visiting the past. If I continue going down that path I'll only depress myself. Just keep focus on the now and the magnificent piece of eye candy to my left. That's right, Chris Hemsworth's twin. He certainly gives you-know-who a run for his money in every category I can think of so far. Who knows, some day I just might be lucky enough to discover those other categories too like… Oh shit, shit, shit! Have I lost my mind? For God sake don't go there either!_ _At least not yet! Have some champagne first. But, you never had to have one with Christian. He…Enough! I am so pathetic. Can't I just try to enjoy the evening already without it turning comparative? _

Distracted so by self-dispute she's unaware they've driven past the huge black rod-iron gate toward their point of destination. Oh. My. God! The well manicured grounds, the huge, white Victorian mansion secluded atop the hills of Morro Bay makes Carrick's and Grace's place look like a damn treehouse. The limos keep arriving and the crème de la crème of society keep appearing. Somehow Ana doubts her participation worthy. "Uh, Greg, those people. Just look at them. I don't think I belong here."

"Excuse me?" he asks, lending a helping hand to exit their luxurious ride, "You more than belong. Relax, some of those are just snoots with old money. They like to keep up appearances. But most of the people who attend this are down to earth and welcoming. You'll see. I can't wait for you meet my parents. You will love them and they are going to adore you."

"Yeah right. I doubt they're going to appreciate you bringing another man's wife to their elegant shindig."

"Who says a woman estranged from her husband can't have a little fun now and then? Tonight you are not Anastasia Grey. Tonight you are Ana Steele, my very lovely date." She blushes a deep rose and the light scent of jasmine tickles her nose. Her debonair escort's charismatic smile instantly puts her at ease. Like the gentleman he was raised to be, Greg holds out his arm for her. "Shall we?"

Ana giggles and gratefully accepts. Looks like our Cinderella is ready to be escorted inside by her very handsome prince. Upon first sight the interior blows her away: The floor of the lobby is tiled with the shape of a golden yellow sun; an enormous chandelier sparkles like hundreds of crystal raindrops; A long curved staircase grand enough one could just imagine Scarlett O'Hara sashaying her way downstairs to meet with her 'gentleman caller'. Eclectic works of art grace the walls and tables and gorgeous exotic plants are placed strategically in corners. A light soothing instrumental tune floats in the background. Quite a diversion to the noisy chatter of the vast crowd of people scattered about from room to room sipping on flutes of champagne and 'smoozing'.

It's hard for Ana to ignore the number of heads turn in her direction: men admiring the knockout in maroon who's just entered the room and quite a few of the women who plain want to knock her out in envy because she's the one who's arm in arm with Greg. He scans the sea of attendees searching for the two who gave him life but alas, to no avail. But not to worry: they find him. "Gregson." Comes a soft voice from behind, "I was wondering whether you'd show up or not."

Both Greg and Ana turn in surprise. "Mom. Hello." He says, giving the simply dressed in a satin LBD Sharon Stone lookalike a kiss on the cheek. "No, no I wouldn't miss this for the world. Where's dad?"

A waiter comes over with a tray of champagne. All three partake of the bubbly. "Over talking to Mr. and Mrs. Ivers." She answers, and nods her head to the right. "And who is this lovely young lady?"

"Her name is Ana Steele. Ana, this is my mom, Regina."

"It's Reggie. Everyone calls me Reggie. I'm so glad to meet you, Ana. You know, he's always shown up to these parties alone before. It's nice to finally see someone with him for a change. So how did the two of you meet?"

"Trudy. Well, actually Aunt Peta. If she hadn't have had a stroke and ended up in the hospital I doubt we would have met."

"Oh, do you work at French Hospital, Ana?"

"No. I work at a flower shop in Morro Bay. He came in to buy flowers to take to her. But I'm also a neighbor of Trudy's."

"You work at Vivian's? I buy flowers there all the time. What do you do there? Are you one of the arrangers? Well, no wonder my bouquets and arrangements always look fantastic!"

Poor Ana can't take a compliment without pink rushing to her cheeks. She's about to respond when a distinguished looking gentleman closely resembling Eric Dane comes over to join them. "Greg my boy. Good to see you. And who might the prettiest woman here other than my wife that is, be?"

And now her cheeks are even pinker.

"Dad this is Ana Steele. Ana, this is my dad, Dean."

This attractive man who looks even better in a tux than his son picks Ana's hand up and gently kisses it. "It's a pleasure. Come, shall we go sit down?"

As the four of them walked off toward the main ballroom Greg without thinking pressed his hand on Ana's smooth, bare back causing her to stifle a gasp from the sudden coolness of his touch. Damn those cold champagne glasses! But she doesn't mind one bit. They quickly found their table (the head one, duh) and took seats along with a few of the other family members all eagerly accepting of Ana. After a delicious dinner of chateaubriand, a heavenly béarnaise sauce, new fingerling potatoes, seasoned rainbow baby carrots and a fluffy chocolate mousse for dessert, the band starts to play again and Greg asks Ana to dance. Her heart flutters at his request and though she'd rather negate she takes his hand instead and is led out to the dance floor. _Ooo, he's just as_ _masterful a dancer as Christian, even better: quick, light, like a pro on_ _Dancing with the Stars… Shit! I'm doing it again: comparing the two._

A round of applause for the lively song that just ended then it's hands together time for the slow romantic one starting. He holds her close, gently swaying back and forth keeping time with the tempo. She get's lost in the aura of the moment; mesmerized by the melody and the strong, sexy allure of the fellow holding her tight. He noticed she seems far away from Morro Bay. "What are you thinking about Ana?"

_Should I really tell him how sensual my thoughts are? And how they regard him? No you fool!_ "Uh, how different my life has become from when I first graduated college"

"You mean marrying Christian, being a mother, having a successful business then moving to California instead of staying in Seattle?"

_Don't forget meeting you, being here with you and not having one single regret_. "Yes, not to mention having a premature baby and almost dying. I have no idea what's going to happen to me next, what choices I'll end up making. It's kinda scary. But I don't want to talk about that right now. Not here on the dance floor. Later."

Ana feels a yearning to lay her head on Greg's shoulder, the same she felt with Shane Miller at her high school Senior prom. _Oh what the hell._ _Just do it. He's not going to mind._ She gave into her desire and _mmm,_ the silky threads of his tuxedo jacket made the perfect pillow. How she purrs like a contented kitten. So at ease is Ana that she's oblivious to the fact the music has ended. Not even the sound of soft applause could bring it to mind. Greg lightly taps her shoulder hoping that will be enough to bring her out of this calm state without causing any undo embarrassment. Worked like a charm… sort of. She still couldn't stop the heat from rising to her cheeks for her part in such an awkward exhibition. He gently puts his arm around Her Royal Sereneness and guides her outside to a secluded out-of-the-way part of the terrace. "I thought you'd be more comfortable here where it's quiet and private, away from nosy earshot of others. So Ana, I'm curious, what's bothering you? Why are you so frightened of your future?"

"I don't know." She laments, her voice as frustrated as she, "Everything. Anything. Life in general. You name it. I wonder constantly if I've made the right decision regarding the kids and myself. Will I ever?"

"I think you will. But before making any rash decisions you'll no doubt regret later, you should try to get back together with Christian, work on your marriage, hopefully reconcile. You want to don't you?"

She leans against the railing and gazes at the spectacular view: the lights of the city, the ocean in the distance. Her eyes close and a deep sigh escapes "I guess so. Maybe. But there's a complication involved."

"Hmm. Complications. I've had my share of those. They can be rough."

"Tell me about it." she snorts, "Whatever the outcome of this particular 'complication' will determine whether I consider the possibility of unity with him again. But then who knows, I might not. I seriously don't have a clue. I do know one thing for certain: I've changed. Believe me, I'm not the same person I was before. I love my life here in California now. I don't think I want to go back to Seattle. Ever."

"I think you're fooling yourself, Ana. It's obvious you still love Christian very much. And he still loves you: unconditionally. You have two beautiful children together. Don't you think they are worth saving your marriage for?"

"Of course. Always. As far as my feelings for Christian…" She pauses, catching herself before mentioning any more of the info she deems too personal to reveal. "Call that another complication."

"You shouldn't let complications get in the way of your happiness, Ana."

"Point well taken." (Imagine, using a 'Christianism!) "That's very sound advice, too. I thank you. You know, that felt really good discussing a few of my troubles with you. Like I was talking with a psychologist."

"I'm glad. Nice to know I could put one of my college degrees to good use."

"You're kidding! Wow, that's quite impressive. So, did you end up getting your doctorate? Should I start calling you Dr. Greg?"

"Yes I did." He answers, humbly putting his hands in his pockets, "But please don't call me that. It's just a title I don't intend on using. Have never had the desire to start up a practice."

"Too bad, too. Because you'd make a great one."

He grins and appreciates her compliment. It's one he's heard several times before: mostly from his mother. A sudden chill causes the 'doctor and patient' to rejoin the others inside. And what luck: just in time for the auction. Greg whispers how boring these things are and suggests they skip this part; say their goodbyes. But stubborn Ana refuses, she'd rather stay with the argument it can't be as tedious as all that. They rejoin the group at their table and picks up the list of auction items. There are some pretty nice items including a seven- day stay at an Aspen chalet, a helicopter ride, a luxury tour of the Washington Sound all courtesy of… Grey Enterprises Holdings. Christian Grey, CEO? _Shit!_

_Shit, shit, shit!_ Ana is livid. Of all the deserving charities he could have donated to in the Seattle area why did he choose this particular one in California? Of course she knew the answer to that mystery: showing off his philanthropic side. Proving what a good and caring person he can be. And how foolish she must be not to forgive such a 'generous, and kind-hearted individual'. _Bastard._ She's being extremely careful not to let her fuming show; decides to make a one hundred and eighty degree turn around and tells Greg she's like to leave after all with the excuse of a headache. And of course we know who that headache is!

Except for the part about the headache (faux headache actually) he's relieved she's changed her mind. After hasty "thank you for comings", "Hope you feel betters" and "Please come backs", the duo hurries out of the dining room toward the lobby and out to the waiting Rolls. "Did you know about that?" Ana hisses.

"Hell, no! It was just as much a surprise to me. I only attend these things. I don't help organize them or gather the auction items. I'm not involved in any of that. But I don't see how you can be so angry?"

Ana halts when they get to the porch steps. With the moonlight framing her delicate but irate features, she shouts, "Because. It's so typically Christian!" She then turns sharply and huffs off leaving Greg very perplexed.

He follows her to the car and helps his riled companion inside. He slides in next to her, a question mark on top of his head. "I don't understand. What's so 'typically Christian'?"

"You don't know the man like I do, Greg. He didn't do all that because he felt benevolent. He did it out of jealousy. He's trying to make himself look like the bigger, better man. Ha! Tell me something, had he been involved the past two years? My guess is no. And he wouldn't have been involved this year either if I hadn't moved here, to Morro Bay, and gotten close to you. Sorry, but his little plan backfired because in my eyes he just looks desperate and pathetic."

"Ana, is it so wrong for a man to try and win the love of his life back? That act of generosity back there I assume was one of the ways he knew best to begin accomplishing that goal. Of course he's desperate. He's petrified of losing you forever. He's frantic to win you back. He's trying to prove he's worthy of you more to himself than anyone. From what I've read about him he's got a good heart and a giving soul."

_And a big cock he couldn't control._ "And a way of making some pretty unsavory decisions especially when it comes to his marriage. He should have thought twice before stick…" She catches herself again before TMI. "Before succumbing to weakness."

Greg starts to laugh. "All men are weak. It's in our DNA. And we've been known to make some very asinine decisions. I know from whence I speak."

She rolls those aqua blue orbs. "I doubt your worst decisions weren't half as bad as Christian's."

"Wanna bet?" he smirks, "Shall I start naming names? Believe me, I know it'll be tough on you but I'm sure the two of you can work it out. More so after the 'complication' has been resolved."

With a deep sigh Ana leans her head on Greg's shoulder for support. "I hope you're right."

Silence. Just plain silence: for the rest of the drive to the beach house. And for two people who respect, care yet have kept their true emotions for each other in check the entire night the hushed stillness can be a dangerous thing. To quote Greg, men are weak. But so are women. Sparks can ignite when you least expect and build to a dangerous level. So it is with admiration: Ana's for Greg and visa versa. It starts with an innocent gaze: blue eyes into blue. Long fingers softly graze her delicate cheek. There's a yearning that's been sequestered and longs to surface; Embers smolder within and begin to burn. Their lips almost meet in a tender kiss until Garrett announces they've arrived at the beach house. Both are embarrassed by their actions but say nothing. Greg helps Ana out of the car and walks her to the door. But even the salty chill in the night air cannot hinder the hunger they share deep inside. A simple little "goodnight" is all that's in plan but again the spark lights. Ana leans up and kisses him. He can't help but follow suit. They embrace and what was to be a friendly kiss turns passionate: tender, hard; intense. Her heart beats wildly and she flings her arms around his neck; he crushes her harder to his chest. Ana feels the desire down to her core and his growing erection against her thigh. They stop and stare into the other's eyes.

"What are you thinking about, Greg?"

"How wrong this is and how I'd love to rip that dress off your body and have my way with you."

She gives him a seductive grin. "And I wouldn't mind if you did."

A man weakened by lust finds the strength to resist temptation. He breaks from their tight hold. "No, we can't and we won't. What we're doing right now is wrong enough. You love Christian I know you do. And you belong with him. Please, take my advice: go back to him. Work with him. Make your marriage whole again, stronger than before. That's what's most important to you. It has to be. Now, goodnight Ana."

Greg turns to leave but halts to face her again. "But, if you've exhausted all your resources and you still can't make your relationship with him work, then by all means, please, please come back to me. Now goodnight my sweet Ana, goodnight."

**AA/N: Now before making assumptions, in my story Elena is one of the good guys. I was so sick and tired of her being the 'bitch troll' in every single FanFiction story so I decided to change her image. She is not in with the scheme at all. And she doesn't want to be. And just to clear things up Greg is a good guy too. Yes, he cares deeply for Ana but then again he does have morals. Okay. With that said….**

**HAPPY FATHER'S DAY! **


	26. Chapter 26

Fifty Shades at Fault

Chapter 26

Happy and then the alternative

**A/N: It's not as long a chapter as last time but I didn't wait as long to update it either. So here you go. **

**Ana**

Well, this evening didn't go exactly how I had planned. Not that I actually _would_ have slept with Greg that is. I guess I'll just have to appreciate the fact that he really did want to ravish my bones and probably would have fuck me senseless until I begged him to stop. I'm left perplexed though. What happened to the reprehensible playboy who has the reputation of screwing a countless array of women, from supermodels to foreign nobility and is said to be responsible for the break-up of about as many marriages? Who replaced him with a celebratory saint hell-bent on saving my own? He just took off in his Rolls. I have to admire his resolve because I could tell from the bulge in his pants he was ready to go. Just goes to show you Greg topped Christian again: in the category of willpower. At least _he_ knew how to put a reign on his carnal urges unlike a certain someone who had a hard enough time keeping control of his own cock. And is paying for it dearly. But now it seems I'm left with an achy throbbing core, soaked panties not to mention chock full of pent-up sexual tension. That hasn't a way of a release. Not the kind I would care for anyway: flesh with a sweaty, panting, naked human male attached grunting my name as he climaxes. Nope, instead of a 'Greg' or 'Christian' I must settle for BOB: an artificial clit tickler, orgasm inducer and G-spot finder. In every way a poor substitute for the real thing. You see, it's hard to find one the size of Christian's dick. But a desperate, horny woman as I can't afford to be choosy, can she? So excuse me while I go search my underwear drawer for my plastic pleasure machine and hope the batteries are still good all in prepare for my next uh, 'date'. Goodnight.

…

**The next morning, Christmas Eve**

Mmm, the tempting smells of bacon frying, scrambled eggs, delectable French toast, and perking coffee trickle through the house and are better than an alarm clock for rousing her sleeping brood from their beds. A bouncy four year-old comes bounding out of his room exclaiming boisterously his enthusiasm for breakfast. Next, in walks Luke dressed casually in gray sweat wear, his nose taking in the wonderful aromas. He was ready to take his morning run on the beach but with this delicious distraction, tromping on the sandy shore will just have to wait. Happy little Phoebe is sitting in her highchair watching her mommy busying herself in the kitchen. Yes! It's time. Ana's ready to serve the lip-licking twosome sitting anxiously at the table the offering she's prepared… and how welcomed the reception. Between chews of crispy bacon and sips of black coffee Luke asks Teddy what his plans are for the day. The tike answers in a voice that does little to mask his disappointment. "To get weady for Santa Cwaus. But, but he not gonna come."

His reply throws both Ana and Luke for a loop. "Why would you think that my man?"

Woeful grey eyes stare down at his plate, "Cwause he alweady saw me. At Daddy's house. He won't come again."

"But Honey, Sweetie, Teddy Bear, that was in Seattle. You're in California now. I mean, look, he hasn't visited me or Luke or Phoebe yet. Plus, I know for a fact he's coming."

That pitiful, inquisitive child's face could melt the heart of the meanest pirate. "How?"

"Well, your father's not the only one with connections to the North Pole. I got it from a very reliable source that Santa is indeed coming tonight. You see, I talked to Mrs. Clause. And she's never wrong."

He turned from a gloomy-puss, to brighter than a twinkling light. "Rwelly?"

His mother nods and grins. "Um hum. Now finish your breakfast 'cause we've got a lot to do before he gets here."

That gave Teddy the motivation to hurry with the rest of his French toast and drink the rest of his freshly squeezed orange juice. He wasn't sure what his responsibilities were going to be but he was more than willing to do them.

First job was going with Luke for a walk on the beach to collect seashells. "Santa likes seashells and because living at the North Pole, he never gets to the beach so it's your job to collect as many as you can for him." Teddy took the task boldly and collected quite a few, even found a starfish. The little guy beamed with pride when he showed them to his mom. "Well done." Ana praised, "Santa will be thrilled."

His next three jobs he took very seriously. Official Decider: on what kind of cookies to bake. He chose chocolate chip. Oven Bell Listener: so the cookies won't burn and Cookie Taster: so they'll be just right for you-know-who. Teddy did great. He got three gold stars for the cookies turned out perfect.

After a lunch of a peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich, apple slices and a big glass of milk he napped but afterwards his chore was to write two letters: one for himself and one for his little sister Phoebe. "Santa especially likes brothers who do favors for their sisters." Teddy didn't procrastinate one bit and the letters were better then Ana and Luke had imagined. So was the picture of he and Phoebe holding hands next to a Christmas tree. "Wow, is Santa going to be impressed!"

The last and most important of his duties was right before he went to bed: arrange the basket of seashells, a plate of cookies, a nice big glass of milk and the letters and picture on a table near the fireplace. Which he'd done a masterful job of! A kiss goodnight to his mommy, a hug for uncle Luke and Teddy rushed off to bed to let those 'Sugar plum faeries dance in his head'.

Now that the two kids were finally asleep the house turned peacefully quiet, nice and calm. With the cracking fire, the four stockings hung from the mantle and the brightly lite Christmas tree it was the perfect setting for the holiday eve. At last, it was time for Ana and Luke to sit down and relax. Luke leaned over and handed his worn out friend an envelope. "Merry Christmas, Ana. I wanted to give this to you now."

Naturally she was suspicious. She opened the bright red envelope and gasped upon reading the content. "You're giving me your beach house? I can't! This is way too generous, Luke."

"Yes, I am. The deed is already in your name. Besides, it's not nice to refuse a gift."

"But, but, I can't afford it. The taxes, the utilities…"

"Will all be paid by the family trust like they are now. It's called a big tax write-off for them. Look, I want you to have it for you, Teddy and Phoebe. Even if you do go back with Christian it's all yours without a tie to him. If for some reason you get angry with him or God forbid this type of situation should happen again which I pray it won't, call it a place to escape to. Go on, Ana. It's yours free and clear."

She couldn't believe her good fortune. _My own beach house? Without a tie to_ _Christian?_ _It's too good to be true but it is_. "Oh thank you Luke!" Her arms wrapped around him nearly smother Luke to death. "I'm embarrassed now. This sure doesn't measure up to the gift I have for you."

"Who cares," he shrugs. "It's the thought that counts."

He and the grateful new owner of a beach house started preparing for the next morning and Santa's arrival. And wouldn't you know an anxious little fellow came bouncing on top of his mother's bed yelling, "He came! He came! Look, Santa evwen left me a note. Wead it to me, Mommy."

**Dear Teddy,**

**Thank you for the cookies. They were the best I've ever eaten and the milk was just what I need to wash them down with. The shells were beautiful and very thoughtful, too. I took the letters and picture with me to show to the elves and Mrs. Claus. They will love them. Take care and see you next year.**

_**Santa Claus**_

"Wow, Teddy, wasn't that nice of him? Come on, let's go open presents and then I'll fix breakfast."

A more than happy little tike followed his mother out to the living room and the squeals and smiles and laughter heard from the opening of gifts was the official start of Christmas Day. Ana couldn't ask for anything more than to see her child so happy.

…

**In Seattle, Christmas Eve**

Inside one of Gail's grocery sacks is one of her favorite gossip mags. After she meticulously empties the bags and puts away what items she doesn't need for tonight's quiet dinner of pork tenderloin, scalloped potatoes and baby peas, there's finally a chance to put her feet up and enjoy a bit of relaxation. She takes a seat in one of the plushest chairs in the family room and makes herself comfortable; starts flipping the pages of the sorry excuse for serious journalism and gasps. Gail can't believe what she's just seen. "Oh my Lord! Should I show Christian this or not?" she softly mumbles.

Jason nonchalantly wanders in, takes an oatmeal cookie out of the cookie jar sitting on the kitchen counter and notices his beautiful wife looking a bit in disarray. He walks over chomping on the tasty treat, "Tell him what?" Gail shows him the article and his response is precisely as expected. "Holy shit! No Gail, you do not show this to the boss."

"Show me what?"

Double groans as the magazine gets passed to Christian who suddenly shows up out of the blue. His face turns ridged at the sight of the bold lettering.

**Is she billionaire playboy's new ladylove? **

Billionaire playboy Gregson Christiansen was seen at the Hearts Sharing Hope fundraiser last night arm in arm with this beautiful, sexy but yet unidentified young woman. Is she the eligible bachelor's new sweetheart? They were seen…

Pictures sure are worth a thousand words but who knew it would only be one said over and over again. Christian's blood boiled with rage. He wanted to shred that rag to bits. It was clearly a picture of that _motherfucker_ and Ana so close together they could be joined at the hip and looking so Goddamn happy! "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…" he rants and paces rapidly running his fingers through his hair until his scalp no doubt bled. "Ana's dating that playboy motherfucker? Son-of-a-bitch!" His anger turns into fatigue. He sinks down in the couch, his head in his hands. "That bastard's managed to take my Ana from me. He's won. I've lost. I guess Ana's moved on without me. But did it have to be with him. I wonder if he's fucked her yet."

"Will you shut your trap you pathetic piece of shit! Quit assuming the worst." Jason's harsh words made Gail's eyes bug out and Christian cease his moaning. "This could very well be very innocent. Besides, you can't believe what they write in these good-for-nothing-but ass-wiping pieces of crap. I don't even know why Gail buys them. Look you wimp, Ana still loves you and I bet, no, I guarantee she wants you back just as much as you want her. And no matter how much she might be tempted, Ana's got more class than to go hopping from bed to bed while she's still married! Now stop with this all 'boo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooing' baby whining. You look ridiculous. Grow some balls why don't ya cause the ones ya got ain't worth a plug nickel. Why you should…"

"Jason!"

Gail stops her husband before another ego-deflating remark can escape his lips, one he might end up regretting later. He looks away genuinely ashamed for his rash outbursts. "Sorry Boss. Forgive me. It's the Marine sergeant in me ya know. It just slips out when I get too overly pissed."

"You don't owe me an apology since everything you told me was spot on. You're right. I _am_ jumping to conclusions. Ana's got more integrity than that. She's always been the strong one of the family. I've no reason to give up hope yet, do I. Besides, like you say it's just a silly picture above a stupid article in an insipid piece of trash publication. I don't know why I let myself get so work up over it." He chuckles lightly then a frown appears after he stares down at the photo again. "Yeah, I do know why. Because she's just so damn beautiful and looks like she's having a great time. With him. I'm jealous. Because, he's there with her and I'm here without. All he's been is good to her and I broke her heart."

Jason folds his arms across his chest in a disgusted manner. "Care for a little Johnny Walker with your lamenting? Or, how about a microscopic violin? Come on. Chase the greenies from yer grays, Boss. Ana will be fine. She probably finished reading that scrap of garbage and had a WTF whatever was I thinking moment. Cheer up will ya? 'Cause yer depressing the hell out of Gail and me and it's Christmas Eve."

"You know, Mr. Grey, I'm canceling dinner. I'll call your parents. You should really be with them tonight. Or else they can come over here. There's going to be plenty."

"Gail's got a great idea. I can get on the horn right now and give 'em a buzz. What would you like? Them here? Or you there?"

"There. If I stay in this house I'll go batshit crazy. No offence." Christian rose from the couch a bit tautly and groaned, took a few butterscotch toffee out of the dish on the coffee table and disappeared back into his study.

Gail turned to her husband and slapped him across the arm. "Jason Taylor, how could you talk to him like that?"

"Ow! I just told him what he needed to hear. He's got enough to worry about with that damn Cassie dame. Have you ever told him about the info you remembered? What you told me two days ago?"

"You mean, about finding a ripped condom in the trash one day and then none on another? Why haven't you? Seems like something as important as that would sound better coming from you?"

"Buckpassing scardycat." He mutters as he rubs his arm. "It hasn't seemed like the right time with the holidays and all. And I didn't want to put a damper with Teddy here. But I will after Christmas. No use messin' with his holidays any more than they already are."

**Three weeks later**

It was a great start of the new year for Ana. She went back to work at the flower shop two days a week right after New Years Day. The feeling of accomplishment she receives from creating a thing of beauty (other than her two wonderful children) plus the social contact is something she's dearly missed. She desperately needed a change from dirty diapers and baby bottles. Arranging irises, roses, carnations et al gives her triumphal joy. Though simply platonic her relationship with Greg is stronger than ever. They enjoy each other immensely with the kids and without: like an occasional casual dinner out or accompanying him to a formal event. How they resist temptation is amazing for there is definitely a solid attraction. I suppose BOB must get quite a workout.

Ana decided it would be a good choice to start Teddy in preschool. He adores the time he spend being around other children and likes the teacher, Miss Winters. She realized flying back and forth to Seattle is hard on the child so much to her chagrin she brought back Skype. That way Teddy can visit with his father whenever possible and Christian gets to see his daughter.

And as for Phoebe, she's one happy and healthy little sweetiepie and growing like a weed. The darling has her father wrapped around her teeny tiny baby finger. Has even said her first word which amazingly was 'Teddy". Her vocalism brought a gleam to her brother's face and made him prouder than punch.

Luke well, he's busy being his 'nephew's' chauffeur and guard when he attends preschool. He enjoys that job since he gets to see more of a pretty, young, blond haired, blue-eyed Miss Cecilia Winters. With which he's beginning to develop quite a nice personal relationship.

In Seattle many things have changed in the Grey family but some not for the best: Kate and Elliott reconciled but that didn't last for long. They are now separated after Kate found out he was still seeing the other woman. He claims they weren't having a sexual relationship that it was just business; That they were only ever discussing the plans for her and her husband's new house and nothing more. Sorry, but that was a fact Kate couldn't buy not when he'd comes home occasionally with 'just fucked' hair. Both still live in the Seattle area, she at their home with their three year-old daughter, Ava. He temporarily resides with Grace and Carrick.

Everyone was shocked when Mia told the family of her pregnancy. Carrick was furious, Christian wanted to ring her neck, but as for Grace, she is understanding and vows to help her daughter in any way she can. Mia left for France on January 8th. All the family: her parents, her brothers and Kate too came to see her off. There were tears at the airport even from her father and Christian who have soon come around to accept her joy. This reception has made her feel very secure in leaving. And waiting to welcome her with open arms at the Roissy Airport in Paris, France was Pascal who couldn't be more thrilled with the anticipation of becoming a _père__._

…

It's a Friday afternoon. Christian is sitting in his office behind his desk studiously looking over spreadsheets. Taylor, who is standing off to the side has just received a call from Ryan. He hangs up his cellphone and turns toward Christian, a dour look on his face. "Boss, it's time. The bitch, she just went into labor. They're taking her to the hospital now."

Christian's eyes grow wide; his heart seems to still; his breathing hitches. _Shit! _The day he's been dreading for months is here at last. He can't move; just stares blankly ahead, his mind a mass of incomprehension. _God, what do I do now?_ This once clear-thinking, levelheaded CEO finds himself completely lost. In relative silence a figure seemingly calm and confident slowly rises from his chair. But they are two very forced emotions for to quote a text… he's scared shitless. "Call my dad. Tell him to make sure a paternity test is ready. Alert my mom too."

He's as cognizant as a lead pipe; about as friendly as one too. He stiffly follows Taylor toward the elevator ignoring Andrea and others of his staff. What thoughts run through his mind on the ride down to the lobby: _It's not_ _my baby. It's not my baby. It's… Then why do I feel like I'm going to the gallows? It's not my baby. It's not my baby…_

Taylor opens the SUV door for a man as receptive as a store mannequin. _It's not my baby. It's not… Stop kidding myself. I know damn well there's a chance this might just be my baby. Especially since Jason gave me that information of Gail's. Double and triple shit! I can feel Ana's slipping through my fingers more and more now._

Grace meets a very nervous Christian at the emergency room of Harborview Hospital. She has no idea of the latest discoveries; that the chances of her becoming a grandmother again have grown considerably. His mother informs him the mother-to-be is in one of the birthing rooms cursing and screaming. "She hasn't given birth yet. She's not dilated enough. But hopefully it'll be shortly."

"Anyone in there with her?"

"Yes. Aside from the nurse there's a mousy-looking dishwater blond named Abby and a brunette named Leila."

_Hmm, _contemplates Christian_. So, Leila the instigator is here along with her accomplice? Should be interesting._

"How long will it take for paternity test results Mom?"

"Oh, usually 24-48 hours. A rush job maybe 10-14 even quicker depending on the lab. We'll see what we can do. We've got one ready to go as soon as she gives birth. It's just a waiting game right now, Honey. There's really nothing much you can do. Unless you want to make a grand appearance which I do not recommend."

"Why is that?" asks her perplexed son.

"Call it a bit of bedside psychology. Do you want to give those three the self-satisfaction that you care? That you actually believe that the baby is yours? That their insane plan actually worked? Yes, I know all about that silly plan. And who Leila is. I tell you later."

He heaves a sigh, about to regret telling this understanding soul these next words. "But I've found out there a larger coincidence the baby might be mine after all."

Of course Grace is stunned but manages to keep her emotions intact. "Son, may I speak to you in my office?"

**AA/N: Yes, I know, how dare I keep you all in suspense like this. Questions, questions, questions: like what did Grace talk to Christian about, is the baby his and what is the thing about this Cassie and is there actually a third person? Most will all be answered in the next chapter(s) to come.**

**By the way, about that plan. I got a lot of responses regarding it so I reread it again and got a "WTF I wrote that insensibly" moment. There were not two separate parts of the plan. All one plan. It should have been (because this is how I originally had it. Stupid me.) "Ana would leave him and file for divorce. And to make sure she never returns to Master we've got it worked out. Cassie is going to have his child. That way Ana will hate him forever." It's not a perfect plan but yet it wasn't meant to be: it's a Leila plan.**

**Again I thank you for all the great reviews and for you fans and readers. By the way I'd like you to check out the Pinterest I've created for this story. I'm interested in what you think of it. Just go to:**

** /nanvirden/at-fault/**

**Nan xo **


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